# Another "screaming kids in a restaurant" thread. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 7, 2012, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125 "2012-04-07T22:22:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/81 "2012-04-10T04:11:14Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > This post is pure genius. Concur. And the asshole server should have brought a dinner roll or soup or one of the 50 things in a restaurant that are ready to go at all times. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/82 "2012-04-10T04:33:54Z")
Waitress checking in to say there was absolutely no reason why they couldn’t have given those kids something to tide them over until the meal came. Hell, even low-end places have pieces of Wonder bread, cracker packets, veggies for burgers and usually some kinds of fruit for various things. Sounds like they were engaging in either a power play of some sort, being a dick in general or didn’t like children and wanted them to suffer. Otherwise, you certainly wouldn’t have effected your other tips by doing nothing. ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/83 "2012-04-10T05:20:12Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > This post is pure genius. +1 Hell, +20 ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/84 "2012-04-10T07:09:01Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Why did you not explain that is WAS a punishment and would continue until she learned to control herself? A preschool age child has a limited intellectual and physiological capacity to sit still and quiet in a stimulating environment. (Like a restaurant filled with sights, sounds, smells, people to watch, unusual things to look at, etc.) They have limited capacity for self-control and self-regulation, even when they “know” the rules or expectations for their behavior. Punishing a 3 - 5 year old in such a situation would be like punishing a 2 week old for not being able to sit up by herself. It would be punishing them for acting in a fashion that’s entirely consistent with their expected and normal stage of development. ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/85 "2012-04-10T08:03:18Z")
**kbear** , if you had a hotel, why not drop kids and one parent at the hotel and go get food? You ate in the room anyway. The children could have gotten into their jammies and watched TV while waiting to eat. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/86 "2012-04-10T11:45:29Z")
> [@shantih](#): > > I don’t pick up on any air of entitlement from **kbear** ’s post at all. I kind of did–sort of a vibe that it was primarily the restaurant’s fault the kids were melting down because they had to wait for their food. There were a lot of points where this situation could have been dealt with, and most of them were directly under the parents’ control. They could have left for dinner at a time more in keeping with how long it had been since the kids had eaten last. They could have grabbed some fast food instead of going to a sit-down restaurant to speed things up. They could have carried snacks with them as pretty much all parents of kids that age do (and they were travelling, so nobody else had secretly depleted the stash without them knowing–if they didn’t have snacks, it was all on them.) If there are 4 points where something can go wrong, and you screwed up three of them, it’s going to come across pretty bad if you call the person who screwed up #4 names while simply saying that you made a mistake. ---
**Author:** ![Corcaigh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Corcaigh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corcaigh)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/87 "2012-04-10T12:18:31Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > You know what I hate? Old people in restaurants. I shall print your post out and show it to my mother. Perhaps she’ll take heed of your words, because nothing I say has the slightest effect on her whatsoever. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/88 "2012-04-10T12:44:04Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Wow, just wow. First off, the kitchen staff doesn’t have to whip up shit out of turn for the cranky kid. all the _waittress_ had to do was go back there, grab a tomato wedge and mabe a cracker or two and hand it to the kid. TGI Fridays serves nachos. I doubt they make their own tortilla chips. If that’s true, they must have tortilla chips on hand. They could have brought out some chips for the kids, if nothing else. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/89 "2012-04-10T17:31:23Z")
> [@tumbleddown](#): > > A preschool age child has a limited intellectual and physiological capacity to sit still and quiet in a stimulating environment. (Like a restaurant filled with sights, sounds, smells, people to watch, unusual things to look at, etc.) They have limited capacity for self-control and self-regulation, even when they “know” the rules or expectations for their behavior. > > Punishing a 3 - 5 year old in such a situation would be like punishing a 2 week old for not being able to sit up by herself. It would be punishing them for acting in a fashion that’s entirely consistent with their expected and normal stage of development. This is exactly what I was going to say. It was not a punishment. She knew what we wanted but she was simply not capable of doing it yet. ---
**Author:** ![champkind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@champkind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/champkind)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/90 "2012-04-10T17:39:30Z")
I wonder if this sort of behaviour happened fifty years ago, and if so how was it dealt with ? I assume though, that this is a more modern phenomenon aided and abetted by liberal parenting. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/91 "2012-04-10T17:54:42Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > This post is pure genius. Oh, was she kidding? I was going to agree with her _and_ the baby-haters. ---
**Author:** ![shantih](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@shantih](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shantih)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/92 "2012-04-10T18:14:05Z")
> [@champkind](#): > > I wonder if this sort of behaviour happened fifty years ago, and if so how was it dealt with ? > I assume though, that this is a more modern phenomenon aided and abetted by liberal parenting. _sigh_ Yeah, yeah, no doubt about it. Or it’s a more common phenomenon now because 50 years ago families may have been closer together, traveling was rather less common, and people didn’t eat out as often. But by all means, let’s definitely drag politics into it. Maybe we can work religion and cat declawing into the matter as well. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/93 "2012-04-10T18:18:20Z")
> [@champkind](#): > > I wonder if this sort of behaviour happened fifty years ago, and if so how was it dealt with ? People ate in restaurants less often fifty years ago than they do now. It’s possible this kind of thing happened then, but people did not notice it as much because they weren’t eating out as often. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/94 "2012-04-10T18:19:32Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > You know what I hate? Old people in restaurants. > > They often smell bad. They hog tables with their chit-chat. We aren’t all retired, you know, some of us have real work to do. They take too long in the toilet. And the worst is if you are behind them in line or walking through the restaurant. COME ON FOLKS, MOVE. If you are too freaking old to walk without tying up traffic, you need to deal with the fact that you are only fit for the old folk’s home, and not make decent people like us have to deal with your disabilities. And for god’s sake, stop blocking the aisles while you deal with your walkers and wheelchairs. If you can’t sit down in a booth like a grown up, you are too old to be going to restaurants. Old people have perfectly fine nursing home dining halls and can order pizza. Why do they need to go to places that are clearly for young, able folks. > > I especially hate going out on Sundays and mother’s day, when everyone thinks it’s a great idea to bring their folks who are way too old to be outside of the nursing home to breakfast. These people are just not in a state to be out in public- especially if they are drooling or have dirty colonospocty bags- can you imagine, that stuff is right under the table where people eat! It’d disgusting. I’ve even seen people going out to brunch with people who clearly had Alzheimer’s. Imagine what could happen- they could run into traffic! They could mistake the waiter for their long-lost worst enemy and deck one of them. It’s a safety situation. > > And then they think they can just get the waiter to bring them water right away, because they “absolutely can’t live without taking their medicine.” Why don’t they plan ahead for that? What’s someone who needs medicine all the time doing in such a dangerous situation anyway? They have hospitals for that stuff. > > There are plenty of places that are appropriate for the elderly. But I don’t want to have to see one while I’m sipping my Mango-Passionfruit frozen Margarita at TGI Fridays. Yes, because growing old is a choice that only some people make, then inflict their choice on other people. It’s _completely_ the same thing as having kids. ---
**Author:** ![may\_be\_ignorant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@may\_be\_ignorant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/may_be_ignorant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/95 "2012-04-10T18:44:45Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Better yet, if you walk in and see and hear screaming, uncontrolled kids, let the staff know that you are chosing to eat elsewhere, and why, and then do so. > > Lost business tends to get their attention. This is, in many cases, so untrue. I used to work part time in retail while I was in high school, and any time someone got pissed off about something that happened in the store, they made sure to tell me that “They won’t be coming back here, this is bullshit.” Good asshole. I’d probably respond differently if you simply told me you didn’t like something about the store, but if you’re going to be a dick to me about it, I don’t want you to come back. I guess what I’m saying is, be selective in who you tell and how you tell it. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/96 "2012-04-10T19:27:41Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > You know what I hate? Old people in restaurants. > > They often smell bad. They hog tables with their chit-chat. We aren’t all retired, you know, some of us have real work to do. They take too long in the toilet. And the worst is if you are behind them in line or walking through the restaurant. COME ON FOLKS, MOVE. If you are too freaking old to walk without tying up traffic, you need to deal with the fact that you are only fit for the old folk’s home, and not make decent people like us have to deal with your disabilities. And for god’s sake, stop blocking the aisles while you deal with your walkers and wheelchairs. If you can’t sit down in a booth like a grown up, you are too old to be going to restaurants. Old people have perfectly fine nursing home dining halls and can order pizza. Why do they need to go to places that are clearly for young, able folks. > > I especially hate going out on Sundays and mother’s day, when everyone thinks it’s a great idea to bring their folks who are way too old to be outside of the nursing home to breakfast. These people are just not in a state to be out in public- especially if they are drooling or have dirty colonospocty bags- can you imagine, that stuff is right under the table where people eat! It’d disgusting. I’ve even seen people going out to brunch with people who clearly had Alzheimer’s. Imagine what could happen- they could run into traffic! They could mistake the waiter for their long-lost worst enemy and deck one of them. It’s a safety situation. > > And then they think they can just get the waiter to bring them water right away, because they “absolutely can’t live without taking their medicine.” Why don’t they plan ahead for that? What’s someone who needs medicine all the time doing in such a dangerous situation anyway? They have hospitals for that stuff. > > There are plenty of places that are appropriate for the elderly. But I don’t want to have to see one while I’m sipping my Mango-Passionfruit frozen Margarita at TGI Fridays. Heh, great post. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/97 "2012-04-10T19:32:09Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Yes, because growing old is a choice that only some people make, then inflict their choice on other people. It’s _completely_ the same thing as having kids. That’s the only difference between her posts and yours - that old folks didn’t have a choice? 😃 Sure they did - to be out in public or not. Same as parents with kids. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/98 "2012-04-10T20:15:54Z")
Except that old people don’t normally scream in your ear, stand up in the booth behind you and fuck with your head or thump, thump, thump on your back, or run around the restaurant endangering waitstaff that are carrying hot pots of coffee. At least, not in the restaurants I frequent. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/99 "2012-04-10T20:25:04Z")
They also generally aren’t allowed to let their wheelchairs and walkers block the aisles, nor to dine in nursing homes where they aren’t residents, nor can I recall (in several years of waiting tables) a single elderly customer demanding that I immediately bring them water with which to take their medicine. Not to pick nits from a great post that’s pure genius! ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125/100 "2012-04-10T20:25:22Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Except that old people don’t normally scream in your ear, stand up in the booth behind you and fuck with your head or thump, thump, thump on your back, or run around the restaurant endangering waitstaff that are carrying hot pots of coffee. At least, not in the restaurants I frequent. You’ve obviously never dined with my husband. We don’t go out much. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-screaming-kids-in-a-restaurant-thread/618125.md?page=6)