# Another Stupid Baby Name thread
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [December 16, 2014, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347 "2014-12-16T02:08:59Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/1 "2014-12-16T02:08:59Z")
Don’t really want to start another one, but today, I prepared a baby’s first Christmas ornament for someone’s grandson. His name? Major Payne.
I weep for this child.
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### Author:  [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/2 "2014-12-16T02:15:48Z")
Better than Private Parts.
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### Author:  [@Flywheel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flywheel)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/3 "2014-12-16T02:35:09Z")
Will his parents use Corporal Punishment?
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### Author:  [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/4 "2014-12-16T02:50:59Z")
What about General Nuisance? :dubious:
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### Author:  [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/5 "2014-12-16T02:58:22Z")
Seaman Staynes
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### Author:  [@dada2fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dada2fish)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/6 "2014-12-16T03:03:35Z")
I just read an article about a name for girls that is very “unique” and is becoming more and more popular each year. The name, " ABCDE ". It’s pronounced, “Ab sid day”. ~sigh~
I’m waiting for her little sister, pronounced,“Ella mena pee”. Written out as, " LMNOP". ~sigh~
I could never be a grade school teacher. I’d end up storming out during roll call.
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### Author:  [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/7 "2014-12-16T03:03:56Z")
Roger Me.
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### Author:  [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/8 "2014-12-16T03:08:25Z")
At my previous bank one of the tellers was named Vageena. Or at least that’s what her name tag said.
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### Author:  [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/9 "2014-12-16T03:21:39Z")
One of my ESL students was a gorgeous Russian girl named Olesiya Vagina. When she handed me her registration slip, all I could think of to say was “Are you sure your name is spelled right?”
I found out later that her last name was pronounced “VA-gee-na” (hard “g,” as in “good”) and came from the Ukrainian word for “scales,” as in “Libra” (cognate with German “Waage.”)
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### Author:  [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/10 "2014-12-16T03:29:40Z")
> [@terentii](#):
>
> One of my ESL students was a gorgeous Russian girl named Olesiya Vagina. When she handed me her registration slip, all I could think of to say was “Are you sure your name is spelled right?”
>
> I found out later that her last name was pronounced “VA-gee-na” (hard “g,” as in “good”) and came from the Ukrainian word for “scales,” as in “Libra” (cognate with German “Waage.”)
Are you sure you want to post her name? It’s searcheable on Google…
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### Author:  [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/11 "2014-12-16T03:33:04Z")
> [@chiroptera](#):
>
> Are you sure you want to post her name? It’s searcheable on Google…
There are probably hundreds of Olesiya Vaginas around the world. 🆒
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### Author:  [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/12 "2014-12-16T03:37:35Z")
Have you checked? You might be surprised. We interviewed three guys for work last week: one was evidently unique, another shares a name which didn’t seem to us foreigners like it would be common with another hundred thousand, and the last has several sosias but we could still find his linkedin with relative ease.
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### Author:  [@dada2fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dada2fish)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/13 "2014-12-16T04:49:26Z")
Uh big mistake. DON’T copy and paste that unless you want to be bombarded with Russian porn. Duh! But there are a few Facebook profiles.
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/14 "2014-12-16T07:50:33Z")
Can we stop using the term “baby names”? Because I think that’s half the problem. They aren’t baby names - they’re \*people \*names. They’re names given future adults.
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### Author:  [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/15 "2014-12-16T13:49:34Z")
Moving thread from Cafe Society to MPSIMS.
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### Author:  [@JuliaSqueezer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JuliaSqueezer)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/16 "2014-12-16T15:33:49Z")
I stood in a checkout line recently, behind a young lady wearing a sports team jacket. Sort of a windbreaker thing, with her team name and her last name embroidered on the back. She turned to talk to someone, and I saw her first name embroidered on the front: “Sha’Love”.
Dear god.
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### Author:  [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/17 "2014-12-16T15:42:17Z")
> [@kittenblue](#):
>
> Don’t really want to start another one, but today, I prepared a baby’s first Christmas ornament for someone’s grandson. His name? Major Payne.
>
> I weep for this child.
Are you sure this wasn’t some sort of GWAR tribute? They did have Corporal Punishment and Private Parts as enemies back in the days of Granny and her Wheel-Chair-of-Death.
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### Author:  [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/18 "2014-12-16T15:52:38Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> Can we stop using the term “baby names”? Because I think that’s half the problem. They aren’t baby names - they’re \*people \*names. They’re names given future adults.
That is a remarkably astute observation.
I was helped at a Casey’s not too long ago by a young lady named “Celestrial.” She had her babies names tattooed on her neck; I didn’t get a chance to see if she had taken a similarly creative approach to their monikers.
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### Author:  [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/19 "2014-12-16T15:59:24Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> Can we stop using the term “baby names”? Because I think that’s half the problem. They aren’t baby names - they’re \*people \*names. They’re names given future adults.
One of my coworkers was built like a brickhouse. Talking about picking baby names, he said that his sister had proposed some cutie-sounding things which his wife had rejected, and the sister kept coming up with the cutie stuff, and by the third or fouth proposal he’d stepped in and said “you know, it’s my kid. Do I look like a CutiePinkyPie?” (or whatever the proposal had been). The sister thought about it and agreed that no, he definitely did not, and from then on her contributions were on more reasonable lines.
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### Author:  [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2014, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/another-stupid-baby-name-thread/707347/20 "2014-12-16T16:29:47Z")
My son has friends and classmates with names that sound like “hippy” names or trying to be “cre8ive”. Most of them turn out to be kids who were either born outside of Canada, or are first generation Canadians. One girl’s name (not exactly this) basically is “CuteandLucky” and her sister’s name is similar to “WealthyMother”. In English. I feel bad for the kids, but at his multi ethnic school it doesn’t really cause much concern.
Still, my son has a name that is uncommon, but known to be a name, going back 100s of years, and has had a few famous people with that name. Also we spell it the same as a noun in common usage in English. Teachers and other people want to change a letter to a more “Creative” spelling changing some vowels. It drives my son batty… he said “Mom, one of these days, a supply teacher is going to spell my name wrong and I am going to be rude about it. Not yet, but I can’t make promises for when I am 15! Please don’t be mad at me if it happens.”
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