# Answering questions in songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 25, 2006, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256 "2006-05-25T23:40:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![bagkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ab992/32.png) [@bagkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bagkitty)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/81 "2006-05-30T03:09:33Z")
> [@Talon Karrde](#): > > To The Replacements: You say goodnight to an answering machine the same way you say it to anything else. Hopefully you’ve figured that out by now. Don’t dis The Replacements. mmmmmmmmmmK? ---
**Author:** ![H3Knuckles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ba8739/32.png) [@H3Knuckles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/H3Knuckles)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/82 "2006-05-30T07:43:48Z")
> [@Talon Karrde](#): > > \ > Another one that always bugs me: You’re So Vain by Carly Simone. Of course this song is about “me”, rrrgh! It really pisses me off when she goes “don’t you, don’t you, don’t you?” Stop pestering me about it! Why do people even like this song? > > \ > To New Order in response to Blue Monday: What do you mean? How am I treating you? I’ve never even met you? > > \ Umm, I might not get it because I wasn’t even alive when the Carly Simone song came out, but I always thought that was the point. It’s a big joke, of course the song is about who she’s singing it to. She’s being kind of sarcastic. Blue Monday: Obviously about an emotionally-abusive (possibly cheating) ex-girlfriend. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/83 "2006-05-30T08:14:40Z")
_Do you really want to hurt me?_ Yes. I really want to hurt you. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/84 "2006-05-30T08:24:42Z")
_Who are we?_ Well, you guys are Siniestro Total. You even have a song called “we are Siniestro Total”, so I would’a thought you’d know by now. _Where do we come from?_ Somewhere around Vigo. That was in Spain last time I looked at the map. _Where do we go?_ Hell, guys, wherever you wanna, it’s a free country. But if you intend to visit my bedroom let me know in advance or you might get hurt. ---
**Author:** ![Manatee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/50afbb/32.png) [@Manatee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manatee)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/85 "2006-05-30T08:41:55Z")
“Are we not men?” I dunno. Check in your pants. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/86 "2006-05-30T12:08:53Z")
Who let the dogs out? No one, unfortunately. Now we need a new couch. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/87 "2006-05-30T12:18:22Z")
Oh can’t you seeeeeeeee, you belong to meeeeeeeee…? In case you haven’t heard, slavery was outlawed in 1860. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/88 "2006-05-30T12:34:13Z")
**Hey Eddie, can you lend me a few bucks? Tonight can you get us a ride?** I don’t have shit and my name isn’t Eddie. Damn. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/89 "2006-05-30T14:01:38Z")
_Do you know the way to San Jose?_ Yeah. Go to work for IBM. It’s the only way you’ll afford the rent. ---
**Author:** ![Ian\_Rey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/77aa72/32.png) [@Ian\_Rey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ian_Rey)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/90 "2006-05-30T16:29:04Z")
\*Oh, say can you see, by the dawn’s early light, what so proudly we hailed at the twilight’s last gleaming, whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight, o’er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming? \* After sorting through the rather complex structure of your question, I gather you’re looking for the flag. Yeah, I still see it, right where it was, o’er the land of the free and the home of the brave. ---
**Author:** ![Diceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/91 "2006-05-30T16:57:54Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#): > > **Do you LOOOOVE me** > > What? > > **Do you LOOOOVE me** > > Og, not so _loud_! > > **Do you LOOOOVE me** > > You’ve ruined your hearing, haven’t you - what with all the screaming you do. > > **Now that I can dance?!?** > > Shut up, show me the dancing, let me _think_ again, and I might be able to answer… Look, dude. If she does love you now, then it’ll only last until the fickle slut spots someone who dances better than you do. Really, it’s best to just move on. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/92 "2006-05-30T17:03:55Z")
Hey, did you happen to see the most beautiful girl in the world? And if you did, was she crying? Nah, I don’t watch too many of those reality TV shows. ---
**Author:** ![BlackHeart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c77e96/32.png) [@BlackHeart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackHeart)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/93 "2006-05-30T18:00:48Z")
How do you solve a problem like Maria? How do you catch a clown and pin it down? How do you find a word that means Maria? Gah! I have no freaking clue. Have you tried posting these questions on the Straight Dope? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/94 "2006-05-30T18:12:09Z")
Two very very sick ones: I’m going to marry you will you marry me Uncle Ray? Please answer “no.” Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you. Timothy, Timothy God, what did we do? You ate the guy. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/95 "2006-05-30T19:11:35Z")
Why do you build me up, buttercup baby, just to let me down, and mess me around? Because I like messing with your head, loser! ---
**Author:** ![Bomzaway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e480ec/32.png) [@Bomzaway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bomzaway)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/96 "2006-05-30T20:32:18Z")
The Alarm: Where were you hiding, when the storm broke when the rain began to fall; when the lightning and the thunder crashed and the rain and the four winds did howl? I was with a few thousand others in the Superdome, wondering where my government was in our time of need. ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/97 "2006-05-30T21:02:13Z")
**How can I miss you when you won’t go away?** OK, OK, I get the hint already! **Should I stay or should I go?** Go … and take that lame two-chord riff with you! Just kidding … I love The Clash! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/98 "2006-05-30T21:35:38Z")
> [@BlackHeart](#): > > How do you solve a problem like Maria? > How do you catch a clown and pin it down? > How do you find a word that means Maria? The first one, I can’t help you. The second, I’d suggest buying a ticket to the circus, then pick out the clown with the biggest shoes. Those should interfere with his ability to outrun you. A word that means Maria? According to Mr. Bernstein, that would be “The Wind.” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2006, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/99 "2006-05-30T23:48:44Z")
> [@BlackHeart](#): > > How do you solve a problem like Maria? > How do you catch a clown and pin it down? > How do you find a word that means Maria? > Gah! I have no freaking clue. Have you tried posting these questions on the Straight Dope? psst . . . that’s “How do you catch a _cloud_ and pin it down?” Electric Six: Now who elected you judge and jury in the body of a beautiful girl? Dude, if you have a thing for Ruth Bader Ginsberg, I _so_ do not want to hear about it! ---
**Author:** ![LIT123](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5daacb/32.png) [@LIT123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LIT123)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2006, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256/100 "2006-05-31T00:28:46Z")
People, this should be in General Questions not Cafe Society. Where 's a Moderator when you need one? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/answering-questions-in-songs/358256.md?page=6)