# Anti-Humor **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 29, 2007, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595 "2007-12-29T15:40:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Captain\_Socks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a8b319/32.png) [@Captain\_Socks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Socks)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/1 "2007-12-29T15:40:27Z")
What are some examples of anti-humor? Jokes which aren’t supposed to be funny, but just are because of their lack of humor. Such as… Q:How do you stop a clown from smiling? A: Shoot him in the face. or… Q:A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew walk into a bar. What a great example of religious diversity! What are some more? ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/2 "2007-12-29T15:46:43Z")
Here’s a host of deliberately overly-PC jokes - [Bernard Righton](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svLyyzBC_qI). (To get the joke fully, you have to know that he’s based on the infamous racist/sexist/homophobic “comedian” [Bernard Manning](http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/3867363.stm).) There’s also a load of really unpleasant and dirty jokes that sadly I can’t repeat here, but you can find them if you google “sickipedia”. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/3 "2007-12-29T15:53:05Z")
Two pigs in a bath. One says “pass the soap”. The other replies “what do you think I am, a typewriter?” ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/4 "2007-12-29T16:03:46Z")
How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/5 "2007-12-29T16:04:21Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Socks] What are some examples of anti-humor? Jokes which aren’t supposed to be funny, but just are because of their lack of humor. Such as… Q:How do you stop a clown from smiling? A: Shoot him in the face. or… Q:A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew walk into a bar. What a great example of religious diversity! What are some more? [/QUOTE] Well, the whole thing seems a little funny (heh) to me. Of course there are jokes that are deliberately “unfunny” in intent. But just as some jokes that are meant to be funny can go over like a lead balloon, surely some “anti-jokes” would make some of the people laugh some of the time. And not just for the irony of a putative non-joke. For one thing, some people may simply be in the mood to laugh at something – ANYTHING! I think the assumption is that we all have the same sense of humor. # # Side question: Has anyone here laughed at something and then later asked themselves, “What in the world was funny about THAT?!” I sure have… # # I remember one friend-of-a-friend in 3D who had us thinking that he was relating a humorous made-up story, but by the conclusion it was a “real-life” tale that ended in tragedy. Funny thing :rolleyes: is, I found out later that it – a story of blindness induced by contact lenses and chemical mist – was nothing but an urban legend! And so the – I can’t even say it, it’s so obvious… * * * (Mr. “_That’s not funny_!” - himself) ---
**Author:** ![t-mobileguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@t-mobileguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-mobileguy)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/6 "2007-12-29T17:25:08Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler. [/QUOTE] That wasn’t anti-funny. That was funny-funny! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/7 "2007-12-29T17:35:38Z")
My friend’s favorite joke, which I think falls under the category the OP is looking for - Q: How do you get a nun pregnant? A: YOU FUCK HER. (It’s in the delivery, really. He’s a very mild-mannered looking guy, but when he growls out “YOU FUCK HER” as the punchline it never fails to make us fall over laughing.) ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/8 "2007-12-29T17:38:18Z")
The first one I ever remember hearing was when I was a kid. Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He was dead. I thought it was hysterical, even after the teacher explained to us it wasn’t funny. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/9 "2007-12-29T17:58:28Z")
Some of these are packaged as “Canadian Jokes”: Q. How do you get 25 Canadians out of a swimming pool? A. (cup hands around mouth) “OK. Everybody out of the pool.” Or “Lutheran Jokes”: Q. How many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb? A. One. ---
**Author:** ![tanstaafl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba8739/32.png) [@tanstaafl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanstaafl)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/10 "2007-12-29T18:15:05Z")
Q: How many (members of ethnic or other distinct group) does it take to change a light bulb? A: Some number n (where n \> 1); 1 to change the light bulb and (n - 1) to behave in some manner stereotypically attributed to said ethnic or other distinct group. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/11 "2007-12-29T18:23:22Z")
One joke my girlfriend always tells is: Q: Why didn’t Hitler drink whiskey? A: Because it made him mean. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/12 "2007-12-29T18:31:14Z")
[QUOTE=t-mobileguy] That wasn’t anti-funny. That was funny-funny! 😃 [/QUOTE] I thought so too! And that’s exactly my point. It’s a very thin line. * * * Here’s one: "A rabbi, a blonde, and a lawyer walk into a bar. Bartender just happens to look up as they enter. :dubious: Rather annoyed voice: “All right, what is this, some kind of joke?” * * * “No Joke, jus’ Jack!” ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/13 "2007-12-29T18:44:58Z")
A man walked into a bar. It hurt. ---
**Author:** ![Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superfluous_Parentheses)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/14 "2007-12-29T18:54:15Z")
I think [this comic](http://www.monkeydyne.com/rmcs/dbcomic.phtml?rowid=2703) is hilarious. Opinion is divided, though. ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/15 "2007-12-29T19:12:46Z")
From my father: A skeleton walks into a bar, goes up to the bartender, and says, “Give me a beer and a mop.” ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/16 "2007-12-29T19:22:50Z")
[QUOTE=Superfluous Parentheses] I think [this comic](http://www.monkeydyne.com/rmcs/dbcomic.phtml?rowid=2703) is hilarious. Opinion is divided, though. [/QUOTE] Funny yes, but not _Red Meat_ funny. _Red Meat_ funny is about 40% snicker and 60% cringe. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/17 "2007-12-29T19:27:53Z")
[QUOTE=Argent Towers] One joke my girlfriend always tells is: Q: Why didn’t Hitler drink whiskey? A: Because it made him mean. [/QUOTE] That reminds me of Q: Why was Helen Keller a shitty driver? A: Because she was a woman. ---
**Author:** ![Red1980](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@Red1980](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red1980)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/18 "2007-12-29T20:03:27Z")
Have someone ask you if you’re an orange. When they do, just say no. also… Q: What do you call an elephant the turns into a snake? A: A snake… moron. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Badger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dead\_Badger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Badger)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/19 "2007-12-29T20:18:25Z")
Okay, don’t crucify me; I just think this is exactly what the OP is after: What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anal rape. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2007, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595/20 "2007-12-29T20:39:51Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] The first one I ever remember hearing was when I was a kid. Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He was dead. I thought it was hysterical, even after the teacher explained to us it wasn’t funny. [/QUOTE] To me, that’s the classic example. [Here](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlT3lEiuYow) is a great video of Superbad’s Michael Cera and Clark Duke doing lame stand-up. The anti-joke is at the very end. Genius. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-humor/431595.md?page=2)