Anti retirement support

In My Humble Opinion
61

I used to be in search and rescue. Volunteer. I’m way way too old for that shit anymore.

My wife is thinking about volunteering at a horse rescue ‘ranch’ I guess it’s called. She was an equestrian in college doing whatever they do for jumping horses and stuff.

I told her I might also like to do that as I have also rescued horses when I was younger (horrific really).

My wife thinks though, that she may want this herself, not with me. And, I agree. We are both retired now. But we still need our own paths. I would be very good at a horse rescue ranch though…

I have my garage/workshop and an office. I ask my wife if she would like to cut out space just for her. She says “No, I have the rest of the house” :slight_smile:

62

I was invited to a “diploma study” (6 months) … some time last year … it was free so I took it …

didn’t enjoy it half as much as I thought I’d do, going back to university after 30 years … I enjoyed good openminded debates, but hated the book-learning (I don’t have any recollection on that, now 11 months later - your typical shitty “name the 6 principals of xyz” crap) … I also found it surprising to notice how much of an edge I have lost (concentration wise, problems recalling stupid details, like 6 principals of xyz… :wink: … etc… as I was really sharp in my teens/twens).

I did pretty good and was very respected for my perspective and such, but did not enjoy the process much and didn’t feel smarter after the 6 months of diploma …

YMMV

63

I see.

I don’t know. I’ve been unemployed for a few months and while I have no trouble finding stuff to do to occupy my time, I have to say I don’t really enjoy all this time off. Basically for all the reasons @DSeid mentioned - lack of purpose, keeping cognitively challenged, external validation. I try to stay somewhat socially active. But without employment there’s just something missing IMHO.

Maybe in 12 years when I’m 65 I’ll feel differently.

64

Ahh…the brain at retirement! But there’s another aspect to “losing the edge”, and it’s not all negative.

I’ve started to notice the same thing. I’m re-reading many of the books on my shelves, Some of them are still interesting, but others less so. And that’s the main issue, I think, in what you call “the edge I’ve lost” . It’s not so much the ability to concentrate, but it’s more how much you care about it.

I’m enjoying many of my old books. But I also have a few college textbooks–and ,well, let’s just say that at my age, I ain’t re-reading that shit. And one reason is that , being older, you know what in that book is important, and what was a waste of time.

Your example of the “6 principals of xxy CRAP”, is great. In college, we were all enthusiastic about everything,-- every word the prof said must be important, right? The prof says that there are 6 principals of xyz, so we paid attention, not just for the exam, but because , gee whiz, principals are important!

No 19 year old student will say “those principals are crap”. But now at retirement age, we know better.
In a formal college setting, there’s so much that is just theory and never has an practical use. Young people don’t know the difference , so they absorb it all. But at 70, I have less patience, and a whole lot less interest, and I am confident enough to know that it is crap.

So don’t feel bad about yourself for losing your edge, and your ability to concentrate, and recall stupid details. It’s not because you are old, it’s because now you know which details are stupid.

65

For what it’s worth, I’ve found a lot of edge-keeping value in actually working at my hobbies. For example, while I was still working I also tried to do some woodworking as a hobby in my spare time. TV shows and videos made it all look pretty straightforward, and I got discouraged when my results didn’t measure up, so I let it lapse for a while. After retiring, I got back into it, and of course I realized that I have to really focus on details to make a project good, and the focusing keeps up my edge. Another hobby, that I picked up after retiring, is bookbinding. The principle of focusing on the details is the same, but a lot of it is on a much smaller scale and you have to really pay attention every minute to what you’re doing.

For me the point is that these are now only hobbies in that I don’t get paid for them, but they are also now work requiring dedication and concentration. My supervisor (i.e. me) is much more demanding than any I ever had in the workplace. On the other hand, I can take breaks as often and as long as I want.

66

That’s kind of the point in my plan to pick up another degree - to stave off the loss of that thinking edge. Mind you, I did get my Engineering degree at the age of 45, so going to school as an older, non-trad student is “normal” for me.

67

While I didn’t necessarily pay close attention to much of the advice my grandfathers and father gave me, when all three of them aligned exactly on a subject, it was something that I should heed.

All three told me separately and years apart from each other that they all wished they’d all retired earlier than they did. And how much they enjoyed it.

So I’m trying to figure it out. I’m not able to or ready to quit working just yet, but there is potential to retire earlier than I had thought.
For me, it’s the freedom that I want. The idea that if I decide that I’m really digging a show and binge until 3am, I can just sleep as late and take as many naps to compensate. Or that if my wife and I discuss wanting to go do something, we can just go do it without having to ask permission or deal with some arbitrary bucket of hours that I can use.

We’re already at the point where vacation time and work responsibilities are more constraining than money, and let me tell you, it’s irritating to have to try to juggle going to scout camp with my kids, have a family vacation and take time off at the holidays. My thoughts keep coming back to “WTF does it matter? It’s not like I can’t effectively do my job and take all that time off” and then I get pissed off because it feels like an arbitrary way they put their boot on my neck just because they can.

68

You’re ready.

69

I keep waiting for this mysterious “readiness” to retire feeling but it continues to evade me.

Other than my body continuing to break down in spectacular fashion I have no reason/desire to face the looming reality.

I had to take my Part B Social Security application up to the local office yesterday since my work is requiring everyone over 65 to go on Medicare January 1st. I had to take a half of a Klonopin just to get through this miniature task. :rofl:

70

I loved my job. I would not go back for double my old wage.

I love not doing it and instead doing nothing or anything as the mood strikes far, far more.

I’m fortunate that my body isn’t breaking down yet, so the alternatives to work are more interesting than simply vegging in a chair.

I’m sorry you’re having so many body problems. That sucks hugely.

71

That was true for me starting with my very first job, which had woefully inadequate vacation time. But the time i approached retirement, i had more vacation time than i could afford to take, because taking it all would have meant not getting my job done.

72

I’ve always got some project going on. And my wife and I play about a dozen games of chess a week. We play darts as well as cribbage. So chess is strategic, the cribbage is numbers and strategy. Darts takes a certain amount of nimbleness, and a little strategy depending on the game.

73

I think it is easier to retire if you have someone to be with at your home. Someone to talk to and play games with makes life meaningful.

74

Yes, I suppose so. With a caveat.

You will both be home more now since not working. So, to make sure we have our own space, our new home is over twice the size of our old home. Gotta have your own space.

75

Yes I can understand that but on the whole much better than being totally alone in my perspective.

76

I think it’s rough on humans to not have a regular social life. You can get that from work. Or from your household. My mother considered that to be part of the appeal of a retirement community, a built in social network. But before she moved to one the covid shutdowns made them a lot less attractive, and she never made that move.

77

Sure. We also have two dogs that get walks every day. We meet people on those walks or at the dog park that I can see from my back porch.

We where pretty much separated when we first bought the new house. My Wife was still working 100 miles away. That was only for a couple of months, and we where so busy moving we would go back and forth every weekend.

78

I knew a lot more of my more distant neighbors when I had a dog. Technically I knew a lot more dogs. Like I’d know Skipper’s parents a little but not their names.

79

Neil dG T talks about getting old. I love him and feel like this is a good place to share his thoughts.

On Getting Older

sorry I don’t know how to embed - the video is 14:27 and I wouldn’t share if I didn’t think it was worth your time

80

In my humble opinion this video is (entertaining) but severely flawed by reckoning that he’s deteriorating physically but being completely oblivious to deteriorating cognitively.

he really thinks he wakes up every day smarter than the day before because he learned something new today and completely fails to account for the things he has forgotten.

By definition you cannot know what you have just forgotten.