# Anti-social distancing **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 28, 2020, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476 "2020-03-28T01:16:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/21 "2020-03-28T06:13:23Z")
Went to the store today. Some woman had her cart parked in front of the stuff I wanted to get at, talking on the phone to her guy (husband? boyfriend? son?), apparently discussing the purchase, to make sure she got exactly what he wanted. After waiting for her for too long, I went and got some other things and came back to find two other people waiting for her still trying to figure this shit out. So, sometimes you just have to anti-socially undistance and bolger your way right in there, because that damn phone is just a whole nother world to some people. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/22 "2020-03-28T07:01:27Z")
A friend of mine (who works in construction) has taken to carrying a tape-measure when shopping. Seems to be working for him thus far. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Rich\_Mann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@Rich\_Mann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rich_Mann)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/23 "2020-03-28T07:18:14Z")
My sister texted me a pic of an Italian man who had constructed a six-foot (2 meter) radius cardboard exclusion device which he wore about town to enforce distancing. It worked only to attract photographers to him. Not the best strategy. I like the tape measure. Much more subtle than my approach, I must admit. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/24 "2020-03-28T11:39:04Z")
Now Iā€™m picturing some other passive-aggressive asshole who starts to fake-cough back at O.P. until you wind up with two past-middle-age men barking hoarsely at each other in the freezer aisle, while other shoppers give 'em both an alarmed glance and increasingly wide berth. Bonus points if you also pictured the scene being narrated by Sir David Attenborough. ("The two males have challenged each other for territory, and neither is willing to back down. Although the chances that either one will mate successfully this season are slim, they continue the threat display ā€¦ ") ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/25 "2020-03-28T12:37:29Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > fart You are living in the past, man. Gone are the days where you used to be able to openly cough but had to shamefacedly cover your farts. Quite the opposite now. ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/26 "2020-03-28T12:40:45Z")
> [@Rich\_Mann](#): > > My sister texted me a pic of an Italian man who had constructed a six-foot (2 meter) . Aus is also metric, and weā€™ve gone with 4 sq meters, which is a 2x2 square (6ā€™6"). But only a 5ft circle (1.5m). Which means Iā€™m allowed to move 1ft either way in the centre of my 2m square šŸ™‚ Our supermarkets are ignoring it, which irritates me a little, mostly because I was already irritated by the way they stack display items out on the floor in order to narrow/pinch/slow traffic and encourage impulse buying. ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/27 "2020-03-28T12:48:20Z")
Heā€™s a Rich Mann and heā€™s gone too far But you know it donā€™t matter anyway You cannot cough on some old man, sonny! You cannot cough, just cause your nose ainā€™t runny! ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/28 "2020-03-28T12:53:31Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > Went to the store today. Some woman had her cart parked in front of the stuff I wanted to get at, talking on the phone to her guy (husband? boyfriend? son?), apparently discussing the purchase, to make sure she got exactly what he wanted. After waiting for her for too long, I went and got some other things and came back to find two other people waiting for her still trying to figure this shit out. So, sometimes you just have to anti-socially undistance and bolger your way right in there, because that damn phone is just a whole nother world to some people. Did you try using your words? "Excuse me, maā€™am, but Iā€™d like to buy some pasta. Could you please move out of the way? ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/29 "2020-03-28T12:53:44Z")
He didnā€™t say he was coughing _on_ the guy who was standing too close. Just that he was coughing, presumedly into his sleeve, or a handkerchief (maybe even hand-sanitizing afterwards). Itā€™s a little passive-aggressive, but if plain old aggressive isnā€™t workingā€¦ I dunno. I donā€™t think the story is cute either, and Iā€™m not sure what he was expecting when he posted it, but I donā€™t quite get the hate. ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/30 "2020-03-28T12:54:30Z")
Youā€™re not far Enoooough away! Itā€™s so Eeeasyyyy to cough on others when youā€™re insane! ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/31 "2020-03-28T14:17:27Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > He didnā€™t say he was coughing _on_ the guy who was standing too close. Just that he was coughing, presumedly into his sleeve, or a handkerchief (maybe even hand-sanitizing afterwards). Itā€™s a little passive-aggressive, but if plain old aggressive isnā€™t workingā€¦ I dunno. I donā€™t think the story is cute either, and Iā€™m not sure what he was expecting when he posted it, but I donā€™t quite get the hate. He said: > [@](#): > > After all, as far as I know, I might have IT and I could be infecting him. Thatā€“as people who have been arrested for this have found outā€“is called ā€œmaking a terroristic threat.ā€ And he really _could_ have it, and been asymptomatic. He deserves every ounce of the hate. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/32 "2020-03-28T15:11:32Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > Did you try using your words? "Excuse me, maā€™am, but Iā€™d like to buy some pasta. Could you please move out of the way? Yeah, this. No one is questioning the desire to have the person give you more space. But itā€™s a jerk move to use fear to achieve that. Why not just ask the person to step back a little? Why scare everyone around you? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/33 "2020-03-28T15:58:01Z")
> [@pool](#): > > Heā€™s a Rich Mann and heā€™s gone too far > But you know it donā€™t matter anyway > > You cannot cough on some old man, sonny! > You cannot cough, just cause your nose ainā€™t runny! Golf clap. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/34 "2020-03-28T16:00:41Z")
> [@Rich\_Mann](#): > > All the calls for ā€˜social distancingā€™ donā€™t seem to be working. Whenever Iā€™m forced to go out to where other people are, at least one person gets unnecessarily close. > > So I have pioneered ā€˜anti-social distancingā€™. > > I fake a coughing fit. > > That backs them right the hell off! Admit this wasnā€™t nearly half as clever as you thought it would be. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/35 "2020-03-28T16:34:17Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > He said: > Thatā€“as people who have been arrested for this have found outā€“is called ā€œmaking a terroristic threat.ā€ And he really _could_ have it, and been asymptomatic. He deserves every ounce of the hate. Probably more importantly, if he DOES have it, he is spreading it by coughing. Coughing spreads germs around much more efficiently than just breathing, even if you put your mouth in your elbow. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/36 "2020-03-28T17:04:05Z")
> [@Rich\_Mann](#): > > My sister texted me a pic of an Italian man who had constructed a six-foot (2 meter) radius cardboard exclusion device which he wore about town to enforce distancing. It worked only to attract photographers to him. > > Not the best strategy. > > I like the tape measure. Much more subtle than my approach, I must admit. Reminds me of a scene from Newsradio. The office went non-smoking, but Bill (Phil Hartman) pointed out that they were required to have a smoking area, to which Dave agrees. When he asks Bill where the smoking are should be, his response is ā€œA mobile six foot radius around meā€. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/37 "2020-03-28T17:13:16Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > Did you try using your words? "Excuse me, maā€™am, but Iā€™d like to buy some pasta. Could you please move out of the way? Problem is, I waited too long, built up too much testosterone in my system. Experience has taught me to go away, because otherwise there will be a scene. If I allow myself to get started, there is a serious risk of escalation. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/38 "2020-03-28T17:24:16Z")
> [@Rich\_Mann](#): > > My sister texted me a pic of an Italian man who had constructed a six-foot (2 meter) radius cardboard exclusion device which he wore about town to enforce distancing. It worked only to attract photographers to him. > > Not the best strategy. > > I like the tape measure. Much more subtle than my approach, I must admit. [Hoop skirts](https://www.thevintagenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/BeFunky-Collage49.jpg) may come back into style. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/39 "2020-03-28T17:25:39Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Youā€™re dealing with at best someone who forgot, and at worst a home rible asshole. Yeah, well, I say down with home rible assholes, whatever they are. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2020, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476/40 "2020-03-28T18:20:44Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > I donā€™t see why a cough is such a bad thing. Meh, I kinda do. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anti-social-distancing/850476.md?page=3)