# Ants! Ants! ANTS!!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 16, 2002, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964 "2002-04-16T15:56:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Drastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Drastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drastic)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/1 "2002-04-16T15:56:12Z")
[We’re doomed.](http://www.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science/04/15/super.antcolonies.ap/index.html) That’s the only way I can see it. Sure, the fellow tries to put a positive spin on the end of the article–yeah, the giant European Ant Union will self-destruct. Sure. That’s just a transparent attempt to try to calm the rightful panic in the populace about the ants evolving into a single cooperative meganation. After they annex the Catalonian splitters, just who do you think the Them will come at next? The ants are coming, and I think we all know who’s to blame. Damn those atomic scientists, they’ve doomed us all! ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/2 "2002-04-16T16:04:37Z")
More (limited) discussion [Here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=109777). ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/3 "2002-04-16T16:25:51Z")
HAIL ANTS ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/4 "2002-04-16T17:14:45Z")
When I was living in Florida, I removed a lighting fixture and the ants just poured down On the table, on the floor, on my head. Down my shirt, in my eyes, in my mouth! EE-YIKES! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![CaptMurdock](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/captmurdock/32/11736_2.png) [@CaptMurdock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptMurdock)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/5 "2002-04-16T17:32:16Z")
_“I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.”_ I’m sure that’s from something, and somebody has it for a tagline. :biggrin: ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/6 "2002-04-19T04:20:32Z")
That is one disturbing graphic. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/7 "2002-04-19T04:23:30Z")
Also, is anyone else thinking of **Watership Down**? Has **Hazel-rah** been in here? ---
**Author:** ![jazzmine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/8 "2002-04-19T04:36:04Z")
Even more [_discussion_](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=110034) going on here. heh. Maybe one of you will save me from being a thread killer. You know, good deeds, charity and all that. ---
**Author:** ![SpaceGhostofArrakis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc348/32.png) [@SpaceGhostofArrakis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpaceGhostofArrakis)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/9 "2002-04-19T04:41:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CaptMurdock \* > \*\*_“I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.”_ > > I’m sure that’s from something, and somebody has it for a tagline. > > :biggrin: \*\* The Simpsons, Kent Brockman. _Hail Ants!_ ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/10 "2002-04-19T05:29:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SpaceGhostofArrakis \* > \*\*Hail Ants!.. \*\* …[without the exclamation point](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=110218), is a member. Heehee! ---
**Author:** ![heresiarch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/11 "2002-04-19T07:02:53Z")
I _knew_ the Euro would bring nothing but trouble! We must find a way to stop all the different colonies from cooperating and get them back to killing each other on sight. But how? Eureka! We’ll give them **religion**! But not just one religion. We’ll convert one colony to Christianity, another to Islam, another to Invisible Pink Unicornism, etc. They’ll be crusading and jihadding and flaming eact other on their little ant message boards in no time. Thankfully, the Straight Dope Research Foundation has already done some [impressive work](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=65105) on inducing religion in lower life forms. ---
**Author:** ![LolaBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@LolaBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaBaby)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/12 "2002-04-19T07:26:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor \* > \*\*When I was living in Florida, I removed a lighting fixture and the ants just poured down > > On the table, on the floor, on my head. > > Down my shirt, in my eyes, in my mouth! > > EE-YIKES! :eek: \*\* OMG I would just have a heart attack. For some strange reason, I can crush a juicy fat cockroach with my bare hands, but get me near a colony of oozing ants everywhere and I will have a nervous breakdown. Just looking at that picture gave me the heebie-jeebies. :eek: :eek: ---
**Author:** ![DAVEW0071](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e19b73/32.png) [@DAVEW0071](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAVEW0071)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/13 "2002-04-19T12:00:13Z")
Heh. What a great time to be the **Official SDMB Hired Killer[sup]TM[/sup]**. Looks like I’ll be farting through silk before the summer’s out. Actually, the best way to control or eliminate a colony of any size, but especially a supercolony, would be the introduction of bait. See, they’re social insects, so they share their food. It spreads like a virus throughout the colony, and they may never recognize the source, so they never develop an aversion to the bait. I like it because it’s sneaky and perverse, using the instincts that ensure their survival to bring about their demise. But then, I’m a pest control geek. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/14 "2002-04-19T12:15:45Z")
Yes, I had to use a syrup bait once. It was oddly fascinating to watch the solid line of black between the hole and the syrup, and the way the syrup had a ring of supplicants. Then they disappeared and never came back! ---
**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/15 "2002-04-19T12:32:26Z")
SHHH! They’re Here! In my kitchen. I thought it was a harbinger of Spring…could it be an advance party for the Invasion? ---
**Author:** ![booklover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@booklover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/booklover)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/16 "2002-04-19T17:15:00Z")
Okay, that graphic is damned creepy!! Sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/17 "2002-04-19T18:42:18Z")
> [@](#): > > We must find a way to stop all the different colonies from cooperating and get them back to killing each other on sight. But how? Don’t worry. I’m sure that soon enough the German ants will decide that they should be in control of the whole super colony, start invading the others and we’ll have to start sending American ants over to help the French ants. ---
**Author:** ![Plavacek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f05b48/32.png) [@Plavacek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plavacek)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2002, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/18 "2002-04-20T03:43:54Z")
And sons-of-b’tching “carpenter” types have invaded my apartment at a rate of 8 per day. Provided urban legend is somewhat correct, I see no reason why my hardwood floors should be tastier/make better building supplies that the 5 story tree out front. -grumbles, then goes back to swatting- ---
**Author:** ![Lux\_Fiat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lux\_Fiat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lux_Fiat)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2002, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ants-ants-ants/103964/19 "2002-04-20T08:28:00Z")
[Ant supercolony](http://www.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science/04/15/super.antcolonies.ap/index.html). [Lamprey cyborg](http://www.cnn.com/2001/TECH/science/05/08/brains.robots/?related). [Child-sized, stair-climbing robot](http://world.honda.com/news/2002/c020215.html). These news items have utterly nothing in common, except for the abject fear of Things To Come that they inspire in me.