# Any ladies in Colorado? This man wants you to have his babies. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 11, 2004, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675 "2004-02-11T16:59:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![liirogue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dbc845/32.png) [@liirogue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/liirogue)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/21 "2004-02-11T21:21:44Z")
> [@](#): > > I would like to have 17 children. Why 17? I don’t know. It just seems like a good number to have. I didn’t say this earlier in the web-site because I didn’t want to scare you away right off the bat. Gee, I wasn’t scared until I heard how many kids he wanted… :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/22 "2004-02-11T21:37:30Z")
> [@](#): > > Notice that sometimes certain things might occur. For example, say out of a field of 6 ‘finalists’, one of our daughters liked 2 or 3 of them equally and couldn’t make up her mind about which to choose. If she simply could not decide, then she could have a child by each of them should she want to. However, such multiple choices would be gently discouraged because of the complicating effect upon kinship lines, custody concerns, visitation logistics, etc. “Now, sweetie, I know you can’t decide whether you’d rather go to the prom with John or Bob. Now, I gently discourage you from this, but if you want, you could have a child with each of them, and that might help you decide!” ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/23 "2004-02-11T21:42:08Z")
OMG I CLICKED **EROTICA**!!! must sanitize eyeballs… whimper, whimper My main question is who was the poor sucker to take the pics? eeeeeewwwwwwww! ---
**Author:** ![luluBahrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e5b9ba/32.png) [@luluBahrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/luluBahrain)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/24 "2004-02-11T21:49:45Z")
I am ashamed to admit I also clicked erotica. It was the morbidness that dwells inside me that made me do it. I was just so relieved that he kept the actual baby making equipment under wraps. ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/25 "2004-02-11T22:04:56Z")
My eyes! My EYES! Aieeeeeeeeeeee! ---
**Author:** ![RainGrowsBrite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@RainGrowsBrite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RainGrowsBrite)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/26 "2004-02-11T22:07:21Z")
How about when he is talking about the tractors: "Our tractor(s) would be big enough for our needs and no bigger. Our tractor would have an enclosed cab. On the farm, I would have to work on our machinery from time to time, and I can do this. However, I am not obsessed with machinery, and especially working on machinery. " Good to know, buddy… ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/27 "2004-02-11T22:19:47Z")
Why do guys who look like that wind up doing stuff like this? ---
**Author:** ![mlerose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@mlerose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlerose)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/28 "2004-02-11T22:32:32Z")
This guy really reminds me of that crazy lady’s website that was going around a few years ago - Mary something or other - and you had to jump through her five million hoops in order to be able to date her. She went on and on about her past experiences with some guy who took advantage of her, so she decided SHE had to be in charge for any future romantic situations. I wish I could remember the website, because damn, that was funny. ---
**Author:** ![luluBahrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e5b9ba/32.png) [@luluBahrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/luluBahrain)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/29 "2004-02-11T22:34:50Z")
> [@mlerose](#): > > This guy really reminds me of that crazy lady’s website that was going around a few years ago - Mary something or other - and you had to jump through her five million hoops in order to be able to date her. She went on and on about her past experiences with some guy who took advantage of her, so she decided SHE had to be in charge for any future romantic situations. > > I wish I could remember the website, because damn, that was funny. Try to find it. Then send the link to this guy and maybe they could have the pitter patter of crazy kids running around before you know it. ---
**Author:** ![mlerose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@mlerose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlerose)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/30 "2004-02-11T22:55:59Z")
[I found it!](http://members.aol.com/_ht_a/mary1777/needs.htm) And [here’s](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=41612&highlight=mary+date) a previous thread on the topic of this nutcase. ---
**Author:** ![mlerose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@mlerose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlerose)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/31 "2004-02-11T23:04:03Z")
Well, I guess she’s given up on that quest, because her site is all new-agey mumbo-jumbo now. But she’s still single, and if you’re a gentleman who wants to date her, all she requires now is an email. And that you be rail-thin. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/32 "2004-02-11T23:11:21Z")
> [@](#): > > While I’m not that experienced, I know from the experience that I have had, and I know myself well enough to know, that I have neither the desire to maintain, nor, indeed, the slightest capability of maintaining, any psychological or emotional barriers during sexual intimacy. Somehow I get the feeling that this manifested itself along the lines of involuntary shouts of “Be my mommeee! Be my _mommeeee!_” ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/33 "2004-02-11T23:23:22Z")
Ok, since I’m at work I’m really not clicking on that erotica link. And even once I’m home, I don’t think I will from the reactions it gets. ---
**Author:** ![Mizzkyttie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea5d25/32.png) [@Mizzkyttie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mizzkyttie)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/34 "2004-02-11T23:24:12Z")
Dear Lord, that man has me so utterly squicked. Okay, so he’s not very attractive at all, but it’s not so much that as the creepiness of his proposal, and the fact that he has **Crazy Eye**! You know what I mean, that totally insane gleam that only the truly looney get. It’s like a train wreck, I want to look away, yet I keep looking through the page. Nyyyuuurrgghh… ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/35 "2004-02-11T23:32:34Z")
Am I the only one who chose to click on the ‘Sexual Activity’ link?.. > [@](#): > > While I’m not that experienced,… _Well ah’ll be damned_ ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/36 "2004-02-11T23:33:56Z")
Dammit, **Larry Mudd** had beaten me to it. It’ll make you go blind, I was told 😛 ---
**Author:** ![somethingblue2u](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b19c9b/32.png) [@somethingblue2u](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/somethingblue2u)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2004, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/37 "2004-02-12T03:52:07Z")
That guy reminds me of the man who was making a suit of flesh on _the silence of the lambs_. I clicked on the Erotica page and that should be used in anti-drug ads cause that dude is cracked out. ---
**Author:** ![Dragonblink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Dragonblink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragonblink)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2004, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/38 "2004-02-12T05:05:20Z")
He’s 5’8" and 140 … dear Og, _I’m_ 5’8" and 140 – and I’m a chick. This guy’s chest looks like a toast rack in a wet paper bag. That thingum under his nose … what is it, a philtrum? … it looks like an access slot, like if you stick a screwdriver into it his head will pop open. And someone should really tell him that Nearsighted Parent + Farsighted Parent does not equal Kid With Normal Vision. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2004, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/39 "2004-02-12T06:19:33Z")
God, I had to look again. Worth it for [this](http://www.fypl.info/ideallyspeaking.html): [quote] [ul][li]Everyone in the household would keep a baseball bat under their bed to deal with possible burglars, intruders, and trespassers.[/ul][/li][/quote] …and unbalanced patriarchs, of course. Seriously, though. Can you imagine the meter-reader’s horror twenty-five years down the road, when senescent Bill, his drooling incubator bride, and seventeen unsocialized brats charge out the house with clubs, yelling “Hold it right there, _trespasser!_” Please let it be someone having a wheeze. > [@](#): > > The picture above probably flatters me a bit… [quote] Some of my strengths are -[ul][li]Have never had a cavity…[/ul] [/li][/quote] That’s just so sad, I almost feel bad for being bent double with laughter. ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2004, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675/40 "2004-02-12T08:55:26Z")
So…curiosity got the better of me. I had to wait until I was home to click on the naughty pictures section. I hardly know what to say. Stardust?? What the heck does “Being’s Curve” mean anyway? Which specific Being? And I think the face-down pose kind of makes him look like a corpse. Though not any less attractive than the others I guess. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-ladies-in-colorado-this-man-wants-you-to-have-his-babies/228675.md?page=3)