# Any Straight Dopers in Assboink, Idaho? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 30, 1999, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759 "1999-10-30T03:53:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Dingus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Dingus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dingus)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/1 "1999-10-30T03:53:00Z")
We should all meet in my Uncle Jasper’s barn to drink ripple. Then we can flirt with the farm animals. Then we see if my cousin Ida Mae is on the rag or not. Woohoo! ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/2 "1999-10-30T04:34:00Z")
…and what the hell is the point of this, Dingy? * * * JMcC, San Francisco [http://members.tripod.com/~weirdstuff/index.html](http://members.tripod.com/~weirdstuff/index.html) “Hear the voices in my head, I swear to God it sounds like they’re snoring” ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/3 "1999-10-30T13:20:00Z")
Well, _this_ is impressive. You don’t want to be social? Fine. Have fun with your inflatable date. * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![Dingus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Dingus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dingus)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/4 "1999-10-30T14:35:00Z")
The day I’m so desperate for human contact that I troll Internet message boards to beg people to meet me would in fact be the same day I invest in an inflatable friend. Very perceptive of you, Sealemon. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/5 "1999-10-30T14:44:00Z")
So, instead, You’re so desperate for human contact that you troll message boards just to bitch about their content? See that little scroll tab on the side of your screen? It lets you skip topics you don’t like. There’s even a “back” button on the top of your screen that gets you out of a topic you fell into by mistake. Try posting a thread that somebody gives a shit about. * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/6 "1999-10-30T14:55:00Z")
Go Seale Go!!! * * * We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another ---
**Author:** ![Dingus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Dingus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dingus)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/7 "1999-10-30T16:55:00Z")
Don’t like them? I LOVE them! Where did I say I don’t like them? I need shit to make fun of. If nobody gives a shit about my threads, why did you post to this one? Posting to threads that you don’t give a shit about is the DEFINITION of “pretty fucking desperate for human contact”. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/8 "1999-10-31T05:09:00Z")
> [@](#): > > If nobody gives a shit about my threads, why did you post to this one? Posting to threads that you don’t give a shit about is the DEFINITION of “pretty fucking desperate for human contact”. What’s worse than a troll? A troll who joins a board simply to bitch about the content of the board, in an attempt to seem sophisticated and witty. “Hi. I have nothing meaningful to add to this forum, but you guys REALLY suck!” Now **that’s** desperate. As far as the seeking out human contact online argument goes, well, of _course_ I’d like to meet some of these posters. They’re smart, funny, and pretty damn cool. I’m sure that there are plenty of people on this board that feel the same way about your posts, dingle. Oh wait. That’s right. Your first post was _here_, bitching about the board. Piss off. * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![ChrisCTP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@ChrisCTP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisCTP)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 1999, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/9 "1999-10-30T19:24:00Z")
For the record, Dingus, we’re all interested in getting together IRL because we enjoy our MB conversations. There’s nothing “desperate” about meeting up with people who share common interests. I suppose you think it’s okay to pick up some hot chick at a bar (assuming you’re a male), even though you’ve never spoken to or seen her before. What part of that situation is more logical than a group like us wanting to meet? At least we’ve spent “time” together. It may not be the same as physical proximity, but it’s certainly no less “right”. Be gone with you, half-wit. Go a-trolling elsewhere. * * * “ChrisCTP-…the sweetheart of the SDMB…” --Diane Chris’ Homepage: [Domestic Bliss](http://www2.crosswinds.net/~domesticbliss/) ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/10 "1999-10-31T05:56:00Z")
Ok, so, my guess is that there aren’t Any Straight Dopers in Assboink, Idaho, else surely they would have flocked to the thread to meet the OP poster, right? Pity. \

Tris\ ---

**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/11 "1999-10-31T10:11:00Z")
I just wanna say that while Dingus is a shithead, that OP had me laughing my pubic hairs off. _Assboink, ID 89043_ premiering this week on the WB! ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/12 "1999-10-31T12:33:00Z")
Laughing your pubic hair off ? Hmmm, sounds like it beats shaving all to hell ! Oh Lion, honey ,come here and make me laugh ! If you do it right, I’ll have a nice surprise for you. 😉 * * * Ayesha - Lioness * * * You sound reasonable. Must be time to up my medication. ---
**Author:** ![RTA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b4bc9f/32.png) [@RTA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTA)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/13 "1999-10-31T15:00:00Z")
I am highly amused at the degree to which the OP raised the hackles of the “hey guys let’s meet in real life”-ers. “Gahh! He’s making fun of us! Gahh!” Dingus, thou art a marksman, and your arrows are sharp. ---
**Author:** ![Nickrz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@Nickrz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nickrz)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/14 "1999-10-31T15:05:00Z")
Cousin Ida Mae comes into heat the weekend of Nov. 20-21. Y’all better pick a different time. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/15 "1999-10-31T16:10:00Z")
I was rather amused, not offended, seeing as I skip over every single “let’s meet” thread except for the one I’m orchestrating. I’d imagine if someone didn’t live in any of the areas, they’d skip over all of them. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/16 "1999-10-31T17:02:00Z")
Idaho, Schmidaho. I really don’t care what you think about IRL-meeting threads. One thing though: " We should all meet in my Uncle Jasper’s barn to drink ripple. " I sure as fuckin’ hell don’t appreciate my IRL first name being abused like that ! ## Furthermore, as Sealemon stated, this might not have been a good idea for a FIRST posting. In my first few weeks, I didn’t even go NEAR the Pit. Now I come here quite often. Possibly to keep an eye on this thread to at least keep my own honours up… Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/17 "1999-10-31T19:31:00Z")
OK, first a big Fuck You! to the OP- if you don’t like it, don’t read it. Easy as pie. Some of these people have made great friendships here. ## Second, Assboink, Idaho had me rolling. Hilarious. Assboink. That’s going to be my new generic location word. Thanks. A friend is someone who likes you even though you’re as ugly as a hat full of assholes. [Zettecity](http://www.angelfire.com/ny3/zettecity/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![Dingus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Dingus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dingus)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/18 "1999-10-31T20:56:00Z")
Thanks RTA, there sure are some thin skins here! I’m gonna like the BBQ pit. I was particularly amused with ChrisCTP ordering me off the board, as if he wasn’t just some fuckwit member like the rest of us. To those of you who were amused and not offended, congrats on having a sense of humor. I’m hoping the EPA takes you guys off the Endangered Species list real soon. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/19 "1999-10-31T21:25:00Z")
Is it the EPA or the FWS (Fish And Wildlife Service) that decides if a species is endangered? Oh I forgot, this is the pit: Hey Buttlips! It’s the FWS, not the EPA! The EPA has an Endangered Species Protection Program, but they consult the FWS for pertinent information! Go felch yourself, ya flaming ass lizard! ---
**Author:** ![The\_LION](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e7dd6/32.png) [@The\_LION](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_LION)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 1999, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759/20 "1999-10-31T21:32:00Z")
If I did,I wouldn’t admit it [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/any-straight-dopers-in-assboink-idaho/2759.md?page=2)