# Anyone else confused by the emotion over Queen Elizabeth's passing? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 9, 2022, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275 "2022-09-09T16:57:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/81 "2022-09-10T14:27:20Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > the real reason why I was saddened was how this would affect _me_. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/8QqD1_g2E4I/maxresdefault.jpg "Why Does This Always Happen to Me?") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QqD1_g2E4I) ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/82 "2022-09-10T14:50:54Z")
Think of British Kings and Queens as team mascots. The team is the UK and 14 Commonwealth realms. The players are His/Her Majesty’s Government. Instead of chicken costumes, royalty wears formal attire. Instead of prancing around doing silly antics to rally team spirit, royalty drives around in coaches doing silly things to rally national spirit. Mascots are loved (or hated) by team fans and onlookers. Royalty is loved (or hated) by their subjects and onlookers. Mascots are paid well to perform their duties for a team of dozens. Royalty should be paid even more to perform their duties for a team of millions. If your favorite team mascot was, say, squashed by a steamroller during a parade, no doubt there would be heartfelt tears shed by fans who didn’t know the mascot personally. Same goes for royalty. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/83 "2022-09-10T15:07:16Z")
I’m not sure how that fits with your snippet of my post. But how we feel about things are about how they affect _us_, that’s just human nature and a basic survival mechanism. About two people die every second, in the time it took you to read this, about a dozen or so people died. Do you feel any grief about them? If a family member or a friend die, they are just one of over a hundred that die in that minute, do you feel grief about _them_? Why is there a difference, if it’s not down to how it affects you? ---
**Author:** ![ASL\_v2.0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asl_v2.0/32/3525_2.png) [@ASL\_v2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASL_v2.0)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/84 "2022-09-10T16:32:02Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I just watched Netflix’s Explained about monarchys. The show claimed it was debatable as to whether or not they generate money for the UK. > > They do generate a lot of money for tourist type stuff. But I don’t think the new king will have that kind of pull that the queen did There’s two notable YouTube videos on the subject, the first of which many of you might already have seen, but the latter of which I believe is superior (because it not only convincingly undermines the economic argument, but makes a strong social-oriented argument as well): [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/bhyYgnhhKFw/maxresdefault.jpg "The True Cost of the Royal Family Explained") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhyYgnhhKFw) [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/yiE2DLqJB8U/hqdefault.jpg "Abolish the Monarchy! - A response to CGP Grey") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiE2DLqJB8U) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/85 "2022-09-10T17:05:32Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > If a family member or a friend die, they are just one of over a hundred that die in that minute, do you feel grief about _them_? I do, sometimes. I’ll be driving and hear about a fatal crash, and think about what a beautiful day it is and that this person is dead while we, the living, enjoy the sunshine. No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as any manner of thy friends or of thine own were; any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind. And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/86 "2022-09-10T22:30:09Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > I am sorry to see her go. I was hoping she was good for at least another ten years, to prevent the ascension of Charles the dingbat. On the other hand, Charles’ time as king may buy more time for William & Kate’s kids to grow up under a bit less scrutiny (admittedly, not much less). ---
**Author:** ![Skypist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skypist/32/169_2.png) [@Skypist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skypist)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2022, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/87 "2022-09-10T23:03:43Z")
Do the paparazzi come after the British royals as much as they used to? I used to hear a lot more about them in my 20s when you had to read physical magazines to get your celebrity news. Plus there was how bad the paparazzi looked after chasing Diana to her death. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/88 "2022-09-11T01:31:29Z")
The news media just keep pumping out big-time headline stories about the Queen’s death. From the ABC News website: “Queen Elizabeth live updates: Princes William, Harry view flowers with their wives” “King Charles proclaimed Canada’s new head of state” First it was maudlin anniversary remembrances (Diana’s death). This is getting to be a royal pain. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/89 "2022-09-11T01:48:25Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > First it was maudlin anniversary remembrances Tomorrow will be maudlin anniversary remembrances of 9-11. I hated the maudlin coverage in 2001. ---
**Author:** ![ASL\_v2.0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asl_v2.0/32/3525_2.png) [@ASL\_v2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASL_v2.0)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/90 "2022-09-11T01:51:53Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > First it was maudlin anniversary remembrances (Diana’s death). This is getting to be a royal pain. Too soon (about Diana, I mean 😉) ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/91 "2022-09-11T03:00:47Z")
I think she worked hard over many decades, and it’s notable that there aren’t any really bigs gaffs. Pretty impressive when she’s had cameras on her most of her life and societal values have changed so much in that time. That said, I didn’t feel anything. She had a good long life. Don’t get me wrong – ageing and mortality is sad, but given the reality of that, anything over 80 is bonus time, particularly if you’re still on your feet. Without knowing her personally, I can’t feel particularly sad about it. And I did find it weird hearing some of the tributes on TV and the radio, I couldn’t relate to the feelings at all. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/92 "2022-09-11T03:17:55Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > The news media just keep pumping out big-time headline stories about the Queen’s death. What about Generalissimo Francisco Franco—is he still dead? ---
**Author:** ![D\_Anconia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@D\_Anconia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Anconia)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/93 "2022-09-11T03:26:50Z")
I’m sure it’s confusing to some of you that anyone would express emotion about anything other than themselves. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/94 "2022-09-11T03:43:30Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > We form parasocial relationships with these people. We know what they want us to know about them, and also what the paparazzi wants us to know about them, but we don’t really know _them._ Not the way family or friends would. > > An example from recent times. One of my favorite youtube channels is “Camping with Steve” by Steve Wallis. It’s good and wholesome, and it’s just a guy camping in various odd places, as well as traditional places, I don’t know, it’s complicated, you’d have to watch it to understand, (and I recommend you do) but he did recently break the one million subscriber mark, so there are others who enjoy it too. > > Anyway, a couple weeks ago, I opened up youtube and saw a thumbnail that said “RIP Beautiful Wife.” He spent a few minutes talking about her loss and that he would probably take a hiatus. Now, I’ll admit that the room become awfully dusty for a minute there, as I joined with him in his grief. > > OTOH, the real reason why I was saddened was how this would affect _me_. I enjoyed coming home on Thursday nights to see what adventure he would be up to this week, it wasn’t _the_ high point of my week, but it was certainly one of them. And now, not only will he probably not be producing content for a while, it also probably will never be the same. As selfish as it sounds, that’s what _I_ grieve for, the loss of something that I enjoyed. > > So, roundabout way of saying that if the Queen produced original or enjoyable content, then I can understand being upset about no longer being able to enjoy that, but anything more than, as you say, a “twinge of loss” and maybe a few minutes of misty eyes seems excessive, IMHO. Well said. Stop and think about the last Doper tragedy each of you read about. Whether @so-and-so died, or was diagnosed with cancer, or reported that their spouse had just died, their kid was convicted of murder, or their parent was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, how did you feel? Did you think your feelings were real? Were they legit, or were you manipulated? Or did you simply not care a shit whatsoever, remarking to yourself that the reality of the human condition is continuous strife, toil, and tragedy followed all too soon by eternal oblivion? Some of us recognize that the only thing that keeps us warm & makes us human is the rest of humanity. Even if we experience much of that vicariously. Beyond that the universe is simply a tenuous and mildly radioactive gas. ---
**Author:** ![velomont](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/8491ac/32.png) [@velomont](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/velomont)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/95 "2022-09-11T03:45:58Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Princess Diana dying at 36, however, was a tragedy Interesting. At the time I and a few coworkers thought the opposite, that Diana was basically a royal version of a Kardashian who happened to get killed in a car crash. My office was a couple of blocks from the British High Commission in Ottawa; the monumental pile of flowers and plush toys was astonishing. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/96 "2022-09-11T04:17:28Z")
> [@D\_Anconia](#): > > I’m sure it’s confusing to some of you that anyone would express emotion about anything other than themselves. I’m sure you want that to be the answer but that isn’t it. I have a limited amount of genuine empathy. I care way more about a street kid from Mumbai getting killed because she didn’t want to fuck anyone anymore than I do about a rich old white lady who was given everything and lived a long full safe life. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/97 "2022-09-11T12:58:37Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > I have a limited amount of genuine empathy. I care way more about a street kid from Mumbai … So despite the fact that Queen Elizabeth lived a truly exemplary life unreservedly devoted to duty, including WW II military service that no one required her to do, you have no empathy for her because you apparently begrudge the fact that she was wealthy and you’re not? ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/98 "2022-09-11T13:14:36Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > you have no empathy for her because you apparently begrudge the fact that she was wealthy and you’re not? If that’s what you believe from what I said then go on and run with that. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/99 "2022-09-11T13:21:12Z")
I’m not sure I feel all that much about either, but for crying out loud - she was born into unimaginable wealth and power - due to nothing other than her good fortune of winning the birth lottery. With the aide of a huge staff, she succeeded in consistently presenting a largely unobjectionable image. Bully for her. Heck, she seems to have been an essentially decent person, but I really don’t know what she was like in private. She sure benefitted from a very unequal class system, and a history of colonial exploitation. I’m not a big Harry/Meaghan fan, but that sure would’ve been an opportunity for the family she headed to bend over backwards to remake themselves into something that MINIMALLY resembled the population they lorded over. I likely wasn’t paying attention, but if she made such efforts, I missed them. So I really can’t understand why someone would feel “empathy” for someone who enjoyed 96 years of privileged existence. I feel far more empathy for the billions of folk who never had a chance for even a decent middle class lifestyle. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2022, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275/100 "2022-09-11T13:27:40Z")
Gee, is it possible that when you described her as “a rich old white lady who was given everything” you meant something different? 🙄 Not to mention the self-sacrifice it takes to devote oneself to duty to the extent of almost literally having to live one’s life in a fishbowl, something that both Edward VIII and Harry and Meghan refused to do, and which reputedly had made Diana very unhappy. FWIW, I think King Charles is a twit, though I’m charitable enough to give him the benefit of the doubt for a while. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-confused-by-the-emotion-over-queen-elizabeths-passing/971275.md?page=6)