It was a game-changer when those projectors started using random letters and numbers.
Otherwise … FZBD4, EGNU5, DEFPOTEC.
Ah. Good times…
I’ve worn glass since my early 20s. I’ve only been to optometrists. I don’t love the eye puff but I can handle it. The one that bothers me is the one where you put your face in the viewing thing and have to stare straight ahead and you have to click whenever you see a flash in your peripheral vision. I panic because when I stare for too long without blinking everything goes blurry!
And if/when you ask for your prescription, make sure it includes the pupillary distance (PD). It’s not always included and you’ll need it if you’re ordering glasses online. You could just use a ruler and a mirror, but it’s easier if you get a professional to do it.
During my annual visit back in May, the doc found the start of a detached retina. He told me it’s a simple procedure to fix. My thinking has always been, mess around with your eyes they never work the same again. My wife and SIL both have vision issues due to procedures they had in the past. Went in a month later to see another doctor, she found nothing wrong with that eye. I am showing the beginnings of cataracts but they don’t need anything done to them yet.
I really like eye exams, but I find haircuts really stressful because I can’t wear my glasses. Not only do I have a stranger wielding invisible sharp and buzzy thing around my face and head, but they keep asking me impossible questions about how it looks. I don’t know why “I can’t see without my glasses” is so difficult to understand!
The eye doctor understands that, at least.
Eye exams still give me test anxiety, and I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve had hundreds of them. (And 13 eye surgeries so far.) I want to do well on tests, and with my vision issues, I never do. I’m happy to report that after years of navigating a very blurry world, I now have contacts that get me to 20/25! (I can’t wear glasses.)
The field of vision test–the one with the blinks of light–always makes me nervous because I know I’ll miss some of them when I blink, and being nervous makes me blink more.
Luckily, the two tests I hate the most I’ve only had to have a few times. One is the Clockwork Orange test. (My name for it.) They scrub the hell out of one earlobe, attach a sensor, then stick a gigantic, thick contact lens kind of device on one that forces it to stay wide open. Then they have you stare–like you have a choice–at this screen that looks like static. Repeat with other eye. It tests your retina.
The other one is a test where they inject some sort of dye via IV. They have a nurse come in during that one because some people pass out or puke. Luckily, I haven’t done either, but the possibility makes me nervous. It tests blood flow in your retina, I think.
Definitely get it in person, but I just wanted to check how accurate it was online, and using Zenni’s digital ruler, it nailed my distance (63.0 mm). So another option in case you forget and don’t want to go back to the optometrist. A lot of times it will be left off the prescription, but it should be on there, so you have to ask.
I have opthalmological (sp?) exams frequently because I have preglaucoma. Optometry exams are not part of that, although I’ve had a number of those too. Optometry doesn’t bother me, and I’m fine saying “those two look the same”. The visual field test is more stressful for me. “Press a button when you see a light blink, but don’t move your eyes.” If I see a sudden flash of light off to the side, I really can’t stop my eyes from zipping over to look at it. The worst exam is one I’ve had a few times where they dilate your eyes, then shine an EXTREMELY bright light into them while pressing on your eyeball with a pencil-like tool. That’s really uncomfortable, and afterwards I’m basically blind for a couple of minutes.
There are phone apps to measure pupillary distance. I used one that seemed quite accurate. I think it was GlassesOn.
Yeah. I’ve been wearing glasses since I was 6; which was back in the 1950’s and I don’t think contacts were even an option. But when they did become an option my reaction was ‘Oh hell no’.
Don’t know whether it’s related, but my gag reflexes are similar. By the time I was 6 or sooner I could hold my tongue where desired using the tongue’s own muscles so a doctor could see my throat – which they couldn’t see through the gagging anyway if they insisted on sticking that tongue depressor into my mouth.
Ah. That would definitely explain it.
Your post otherwise sounded a bit like they were trying to upsell you so I wondered whether their recommended frequency was an upsell; but if they’re specifically worried about high glaucoma risk it makes sense.
I’ve never had either of those. Maybe there’s something specific about your retinas that makes them want to take an extra hard look.
Another person who finds the “which is better? A? or B?” part of the exam stressful. Sometimes I can’t tell the difference, and I worry that if I give the wrong answer I’m going to screw up my prescription.
A number of years back I was diagnosed as “borderline diabetic” so my ophthalmologist did a series of tests to establish a “baseline” to monitor possible changes in various eye conditions. So every few years in addition to my “do I need new glasses” exams I get to have follow-up exams for these tests. I just had to go in twice for this particular test, because apparently the results of the first one were “inconclusive”. I had the same problem with this one as markn_1 did, so having todo it twice was definitely stressful.
+100 on air puff terror.
I bet they could sell action photos, like you see exiting roller coasters, water slides, or ski slopes. Some ruler grids/hashes digitally overlaid to show jump heights in the chair. Perhaps an inset showing the facial contorsion in closeup.
Sign here and we’ll start recording. Chin on the ledge, please, and sit up.
Chiming in to say that I also get stressed about almost all of the process! I stumbled into a doctor’s office I really like. A friend told me he ophthalmologist was really good. I’m very bad at remembering names, so I went online, found the location, and called for an appointment. When I got there, I discovered there were two ophthalmology practices in the building, and I’d called the other one.
Test anxiety seems to be a lot of my problem; having people get really close to my eyes with various instruments is the rest. I’m not a huge fan of paying hundreds of dollars for glasses, either, but that’s the way of the world. I just always hope I won’t need glasses and a new crown in the same year.
I didn’t realize about the retinal melanoma thing, but did you know that your retinas can get wrinkly? Everything I look at with my left eye is wavy, and they can’t correct that eye all the way with lenses. I’m also told that I have the beginnings of cataracts, but they’re not bothersome enough for surgery yet. I remember my grandfather trying to see around his cataracts well enough to drive (and not doing well with it) for years because he was scared of the operation, and I’m not going to make that mistake!
Ain’t THAT the truth! 
Yeah - that’s a good description.
So, how do you guys approach it? I found myself varying between getting an overall “sense” of the bottom line, of cuing in on a specific feature - say the gap in the “c”. And I pretty generally go with my immediate reaction. If I don’t quickly feel one is better, I say they are about the same.
Prescription changed a tad for the worse. Got new lenses for my regular frames, new lenses and frames for my sunglasses. Will be 3 months before I’m able to see if they work better on the golf course!
Would you like to indulge in a slow burn? Check out the “Adam Ruins Everything,” episode about eyeglasses and fume.
Oh, I have glaucoma, but it’s pretty stable now. Once when I was at the John Moran eye clinic in Salt Lake, the corneal specialist called in a retinal specialist, who saw something he didn’t like, and that was the first time had the Clockwork Orange test. And then a few years later, I lost the vision in one eye. It turned out to be endophthalmitis, an infection inside the eyeball. Luckily, with treatment, I was able to get back the vision I had before it.
Anyway, I think the reason for all the tests is that I’ve had so many vision issues and surgeries. I’m really happy now because I’m down to semi-annual visits to the corneal and retinal specialists and annual visits to the optometrist. And I know this sounds cheesy, but every day I stop what I’m doing and really look at one thing–tree bark, the moon, a sink full of suds–and realize I’m seeing it for three people, myself and the cornea donors. I’m very, very lucky.
I don’t mind optometrists, but…
I have great difficulty with the ophthalmologist and his slit-lamp machine. Even for a simple routine checkup.
I put my head in the frame, pressing my forehead and chin against the metal bars…and. well,…it don’t go good! The doctor moves the bright light up close, and then pushes the suction-cup thing even closer till it touches my eyeball…and I jump out of my skin. My lizard brain kicks in, and I involuntarily and instinctively jump backwards. There’s a foreign object about to smash into my sensitive spot!!! Run away!!!
(The ladies may not empathize so much, but all you gentlemen have felt this instinct: that horrible moment of terror when you see a fast moving object about to hit you hard in the balls. You don’t just flinch a little bit–you jump faster than you have ever moved before, your whole body breaking the speed of sound. Whether it’s a toddler running full speed at your crotch, or a baseball flying in the wrong direction…you MOVE, and you move fast.)
So the ophthalmologist gets angry at me.
I get angry at me, too.
I know rationally that it’s nothing to be afraid of. But the rational part of my brain ain’t involved here, folks. So I try again…I move my chair back into position, press my face back into the frame of the machine, hold my breath, squeeze a death grip with my fingers around the table legs to brace myself…and, on the second try, the doctor succeeds in doing the checkup. Well, most of the time. Sometimes, it takes a third try before I calm myself down and act like a rational adult.
So now, after all that background, here is my question:
What are the “distraction techniques” you mention?
I will soon need cataract surgery…HOW THE HELL WILL I SURVIVE?
I am scared of the surgery, absolutely terrified. I doubt that I can lay quietly without moving when I see the doctor sticking his razor blade into my eye. I’m terrified that I will move, jerk involuntarily, bump the surgeon’s hand, and destroy my eyes.
Can the operation be done under full anesthesia, so I never know it took place? (like when I’ve done colonoscopy exams).
also…I have cataracts in both eyes. Should I do two separate operations, on different days?
I am afraid of have an operation on both of them at once. Not just because of all my fears I’ve described above…
But for a different reason: shit happens. Human beings make mistakes.
If I happen to have the surgery on a morning when the doctor is having a bad day, mistakes could happen. And a mistake means I could go blind. If the doctor is not fully concentrating, ( maybe he’s going thru a divorce and the judge notified him today that all his money is going to his ex; Maybe a traffic accident on the way to work ruined his car, etc…) . He is doing very delicate work, and a mistake of a half millimeter would result in a very,very bad life for me. I know the chances are very small…but I would rather only lose sight in one eye, and leave the other one working.
I haven’t had cataract surgery but I’ve talked to a surgeon about it. They anaesthetize your eye and eye muscles, so the procedure doesn’t depend on you voluntarily holding still. You won’t really have a choice. I think they usually use propofol or some other “twilight” sedation drug like they use in colonoscopies. It certainly won’t be the first time the surgeon has had a patient who’s nervous about the procedure.
not really but I don’t like two things about it.
I only broke down & got reading glasses about 6 or 7 years ago. While I’m still on the same prescription as the first pair, it’s quite obviously I’m getting more & more bat like if I try & read my phone w/o them. I also don’t need bifocals…yet, but they’ll be coming at some point. So every visit is a sad reminder I’m on the wrong side of aging & I won’t ever be as good again as I used to be.
I don’t do well with things touching my eye, like them trying to put in the dilation drops where I need to keep by eye wide open & that bottle coming in & touching it with drop. I have to push my head back against the wall, hold my eye open & even then I have problems with it. Needles? Pfft, no problem; an eyedrop? Full on flight or fight mode.
I can’t answer for all eventualities, but my experience was that (a) a cloth was put over my face with a cut-out to expose only the eye to be operated on, (b) the anaesthetist put some numbing drops into the eye, chatted about this and that for a while (to let them take effect), got me to look up and into the corners of the ceiling, and injected the anaesthetic before I was aware of it (c) once that had taken effect, the surgeon took over, and because of the cataract I couldn’t see anything of what she was doing, all I was aware of was the bright light from her headlight and the sound of the ultrasound machine she was using to break up the cataract and whatever was washing the debris away. Oh, and the conversation other staff in the room were having about their holiday plans.
Genuinely, it did not hurt, and was over in 15-20 minutes. The worst bit was not being able to move - even just a wiggle of my toes made her tell me off. And some people might squirm (but I was fascinated) that at one point towards the end I saw my eyelashes in perfect definition.
Tea and biscuits in the recovery room, then a taxi home. I had to be at the hospital for 9:00 am and was home for lunch. I was told I could take the dressing off later that afternoon, but I should use the plastic eye guard overnight for a couple of weeks, and there was a whole regime of eyedrops for several weeks more.