# Anyone else find sex toys too funny/awkward to be useful? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 27, 2013, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288 "2013-08-27T11:40:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/41 "2013-08-29T05:33:27Z")
> [@Green\_Bean](#): > > Why would you buy a toy that you found ridiculous? Why would you buy a toy that looks too awkward to use? > > Advice for sex-toy beginners: If something makes you laugh, DON’T BUY THAT ONE. And try something simple first. and a recent court case suggests that bets on Wii games involving sex toys are not a good idea: [Sex Bet on Wii Game Ends With Mountie Shooting His Wife](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=697111) ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/42 "2013-08-29T05:56:11Z")
My girlfriend and I have a nice collection of toys, but we’re up for trying anything we find lying around the house, too. I’m reminded of the tangerine fiasco… ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/43 "2013-08-29T16:53:02Z")
> [@Arrendajo](#): > > I’m reminded of the tangerine fiasco… Now **there’s** a sentence that you don’t read every day…😃 ---
**Author:** ![ducati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cc9497/32.png) [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/44 "2013-08-29T17:18:18Z")
> [@Arrendajo](#): > > the tangerine fiasco… Pretty sure that’s by [Robert Ludlum](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Ludlum#Selected_bibliography), though I don’t see it listed. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/45 "2013-08-29T18:07:36Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Clearly the porn version of Mrs. Pigglewiggle. OK where’s the brain bleach? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/46 "2013-08-29T18:18:40Z")
> [@Arrendajo](#): > > My girlfriend and I have a nice collection of toys, but we’re up for trying anything we find lying around the house, too. I’m reminded of the tangerine fiasco… I’ve also heard of mayonnaise jar fiascos, wine bottle fiascos, tool box fiascos (with the tools still inside), etc. :eek: You can’t make this stuff up. ---
**Author:** ![standingwave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@standingwave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/standingwave)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/47 "2013-08-29T18:36:51Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I’ve also heard of mayonnaise jar fiascos, wine bottle fiascos, tool box fiascos (with the tools still inside), etc. :eek: You can’t make this stuff up. And fiascos with the [canvas drive-belt](http://www.snopes.com/medical/emergent/stapled.asp) of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. Now _that’s_ a sex toy! ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/48 "2013-08-29T19:02:23Z")
> [@standingwave](#): > > And fiascos with the [canvas drive-belt](http://www.snopes.com/medical/emergent/stapled.asp) of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. > > Now _that’s_ a sex toy! dude’s got ball ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/49 "2013-08-29T20:24:22Z")
> [@simster](#): > > dude’s got ball At least he still has _one_. Could’ve been worse. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Girlundone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/919ad9/32.png) [@Girlundone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girlundone)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2013, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/50 "2013-08-29T21:55:23Z")
[QUOTE=panache45] We have a dungeon in the attic, with lots of equipment and lots of toys [/QUOTE] Personally I’ve found the best toys for bondage and discipline can be found right at the nearest Home Depot. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/51 "2013-09-04T03:08:16Z")
> [@Lucky\_13](#): > > You know, I remember a scene in the movie “Stripes” where this item was allegedly used. I didn’t understand how when I first saw it as a teenager, and now, many years later and with much experience under my belt (so to speak), I still don’t.😕 Can someone please explain, or at least point me toward some relevant links? (Seriously though, I never understood how that worked.) Not _Stripes_ - [_Bachelor Party_](http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=D5Llfql8Qc4#t=62) And, of course, it didn’t work - it was a funny character making a joke about being sexually depraved. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/52 "2013-09-04T03:30:07Z")
> [@Lucky\_13](#): > > You know, I remember a scene in the movie “Stripes” where this item was allegedly used. I didn’t understand how when I first saw it as a teenager, and now, many years later and with much experience under my belt (so to speak), I still don’t.😕 Can someone please explain, or at least point me toward some relevant links? (Seriously though, I never understood how that worked.) > [@Nametag](#): > > Not _Stripes_ - [_Bachelor Party_](http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=D5Llfql8Qc4#t=62) > > And, of course, it didn’t work - it was a funny character making a joke about being sexually depraved. _Stripes_ too. I remember the scene well. Bill Murray suggested using it. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/53 "2013-09-04T03:35:29Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > wine bottle fiascos In Italy, a [fiasco](https://www.google.com/search?q=fiasco+di+chianti&safe=off&tbm=isch&biw=1056&bih=530) _is_ a [wine bottle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fiasco_(bottle)), exactly. > [@](#): > > :eek: You can’t make this stuff up. _[Davvero](http://www.wordreference.com/iten/davvero)_. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/54 "2013-09-04T03:47:38Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > _Stripes_ too. I remember the scene well. Bill Murray suggested using it. Your memory is skewed. Bill used a metal spatula, a rolling pin, and then an ice cream scoop. But not a hand held mixer. [HERE](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYq75Gm4UdI) is the clip. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/55 "2013-09-04T05:19:44Z")
I guess it is. Could have sworn he used a handheld mixer. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2013, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/56 "2013-09-04T06:34:18Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I guess it is. Could have sworn he used a handheld mixer. Yeah? To tell you the truth, me too. Which is why I looked it up. It’s weird how memory can screw with you big time. I can remember conversations I had with kids in grade school in 1966, but forget shit I really needed to buy while I was at the store yesterday! Fuck! ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/57 "2013-09-07T18:29:04Z")
Like someone said upthread: if it gives you the giggles, or if it makes you scratch your head and wonder WTF is it you do with it, better not buy it. > [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I always wondered what people carry around in briefcases. There is an exciting career for you with the TSA. (And I’m sure there’s any number of people who pack these implements in their carry-ons just to mess with the screeners) ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/58 "2013-09-08T01:17:26Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > There is an exciting career for you with the TSA. > (And I’m sure there’s any number of people who pack these implements in their carry-ons just to mess with the screeners) I can’t find it now, but awhile back a Thai lady wrote an amusing article on sex toys and interviewed one lady who she’d bought one in Hong Kong and had it in her carry-on for the return trip to Bangkok. Once the inspector at the airport there realized what it was, his amusement matched her embarrassment. ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/59 "2013-09-08T15:34:06Z")
The chin-strap thing is goofy looking, but I don’t think you’re supposed to look at it. > [@RTFirefly](#): > > You’ve mentioned this in other threads, and each time, my first thought is: your house is upside down. 😃 > [@Green\_Bean](#): > > The house is inverted too! If it’s upside down and inverted, doesn’t that make it right side up again? ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288/60 "2013-09-08T15:35:14Z")
> [@Girlundone](#): > > Personally I’ve found the best toys for bondage and discipline can be found right at the nearest Home Depot. “Home Depot: You can do it. We can help.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-find-sex-toys-too-funny-awkward-to-be-useful/667288.md?page=4)