# Anyone else hate massages? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 15, 2012, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868 "2012-02-15T00:52:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/41 "2012-02-15T19:31:51Z")
Regarding pedis: Not really fond of those either - usually there’s scraping/pushing near the nail bed that hurts (from what I’ve been told, it shouldn’t if done well) and attempts at foot massage usually hit some tendon or muscle on the bottom of the foot that is uncomfortable. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/42 "2012-02-15T19:42:06Z")
My only professional massage was kinda a trade deal with a customer who owned a massage place. I had been doing work there on and off for a couple years so all the girls know me and such. The boss asked if I had ever had a massage…I replied no. He said to pick one of the girls and we could do a trade. All of the girls looked like “pick me” and not wanting to hurt anyones feelings I said “they all look so wonderful I would have a hard time deciding” a few knowing glances were exchanged and I was directed to go to one of the massage rooms and told to disrobe. So I go in, I get undressed, hop on the table, laying face down. Next thing I know all three of them are rubbing me down with hot towels. They spent the next hour working me over quite thoroughly. I left feeling like a million bucks, clean, relaxed and feeling quite adored being the subject of 100% of the attentions of 3 adorable 20something chineese women. That said, the thing for me was not the massage, but the attention. Someone who is giving you an hour of low grade uninterrupted affection. No kids fighting, no phones ringing, no conditions, no “what about me”. Just an hour of being touched. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/43 "2012-02-15T19:58:20Z")
I’ve had mixed experiences with professional massages, but they do definitely tend to lend more toward OW!!! than _Ooooh_. I, like many here, am not terribly keen on the sharp pressure that can be applied. But those of you who are like me, I suggest a hot stone massage. Good lord was that relaxing and I felt amazing after. Anywho, my boyfriend is/was a licensed masseuse (went to school and all that, though he works in IT now had has for the last few years). I like his massages mostly because it’s informal and, unlike a fancy spa massage, I can say, “YOW, THAT HURTS!!!” without feeling awkward :D. He says that the reason certain parts hurt is that I don’t get massages frequently enough and, if I did, the pain wouldn’t be there. I thought this was all hooey, but the truth is that since I’ve been getting semi regular massages from him, the pressure does hurt less. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/44 "2012-02-15T20:09:50Z")
I am not interested in professional massages, but massages from my SO are always welcome. ---
**Author:** ![Pleonast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pleonast/32/1183_2.png) [@Pleonast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pleonast)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/45 "2012-02-15T20:41:32Z")
I’ve never liked massages. Pressure hurts! Where others like massages for relaxation, I like stretching. If a muscle is tight or sore, I stretch it out and feel much better. ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/46 "2012-02-15T21:21:07Z")
Though I also hate the face cradle I have very tight muscles and I exercise a lot, so deeper massage, the deeper the better, hurts (in a good way though) but leaves me feeling great after. I would like one every day. A lot of people I know IRL have no use for massage, including my ex. I am trained in massage, would have done it anything, and very occasionally if he was having real pain from neck tension he’d ask me to work on it, but he honestly didn’t enjoy or want it otherwise. Giving massages to clients, and getting them from other professionals, somehow feels not at all intimate to me. Not sure how it works but it’s absolutely **nothing** like being touched or touching a sexual partner naked. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/47 "2012-02-15T21:35:12Z")
I give my wife massages quite regularly, 1-3 times per week, and she adores them. Of course, I’ve 20 years of practice on a single client so I had better get it right! The standard massage includes: Facial massage Scalp massage Neck and Shoulder massage This thing where I ‘roll’ her head in a circle - really loosens up the neck muscles This other thing where I grab an arm and rotate it, stretching out the muscles - one can hear the tendons pop Arm, hand, and finger massages All the above I do while sitting behind her, while we’re watching TV - we can do this for an hour or two, until I get bored or she falls asleep. She doesn’t give me massages - not strong enough in her hands to effectively do so. So, for Christmas, she went to Family Leisure and got me [one of these](http://www.familyleisure.com/Massage-Chairs/Divina-Massage-Chair), which is awesome. But I’m sure a real person could do better… ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/48 "2012-02-15T21:50:38Z")
It feels uncomfortable and awkward to me. In my old job people (women) were always giving each other massages and the moans of apparent pleasure really made me uncomfortable. I can’t even imagine having a complete stranger touch you so intimately for money\*. I don’t mind them from my SO, but I only like them in short stretches. The stuff JohnT does for his wife would have me squirming away. 🙂 \*Really. And prostitution is illegal. It’s hardly any difference! ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/49 "2012-02-15T21:53:26Z")
There’s also a lot of scratching involved… ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/50 "2012-02-15T22:01:27Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > I’ve the same problem. My mother used to give shoulder massages to my Dad and my brother; I couldn’t stand it. Oh good. I was starting to get scared that I was the only one here who doesn’t like them from simply being too damn ticklish. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2012, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/51 "2012-02-15T23:43:00Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > I wonder if there’s any general pattern of people liking pedis and hating massages, or hating pedis and liking massages. That is a very interesting thought. I _do_ love pedis, manis, etc. I even really like getting my hair done. That feels indulgent to me in the way that I imagine massages feel to people who like them. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2012, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/52 "2012-02-16T03:00:53Z")
Thai massage – and I don’t mean the “happy ending” kind – is supposed to be all the rage, but the times I’ve tried it, it just seemed like a waste of time. Funny thing is that anyone with no training whatsoever can put out a sign in a tourist area that reads “Traditional Thai Massage” and be guaranteed lots of customers who “ooh” and “ahh” over the experience. And traveling through the region, I’ve seen lots of signs reading “Traditional Cambodian Massage,” “Traditional Indonesian Massage” etc, depending on the country, and I’ve never heard of such traditions in many of these cultures. But I have had traditional massage from people I know to have been properly trained and certified, and it just didn’t do anything for me. I can’t say I “hated” it, but I did find myself bored to tears. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2012, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868/53 "2012-02-16T14:28:31Z")
I get professional sports massages about once a month. They are deep tissue, hurt like hell, but when they are done I feel so much better. I’ve had several professional relaxation massages, and I love them as well. It’s hard for me to fathom that so many people don’t like being touched like that. Different squids for different kids, I guess. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-hate-massages/612868.md?page=2)