# Anyone else who doesn't get bothered by public speaking at all?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [April 26, 2016, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193 "2016-04-26T15:40:16Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 11\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2016, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/81 "2016-04-29T22:33:02Z")

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> [@monstro](#):
>
> . . . it is apparent the OP thinks that a person who is afraid to speak in front of an audience is being completely irrational . . .

To be fair, it is irrational, like all phobias. There is zero rational reason to be afraid of speaking before a crowd. What are they going to do? Charge the stage and beat you up?

> [@](#):
>
> I don’t know what’s the problem in recognizing that not everyone is good at everything and that sometimes people keep to their comfort zones for very good reasons.

No one here is denying this at all, in any way. If you have that phobia, or that discomfort, then that should be respected. No one should be compelled to speak in public if they don’t want to. (Just as no one should have spiders put in their face if they don’t want that.)

You respect my phobia, and I’ll respect yours. But don’t try to pretend that phobias are anything other than irrational. They’re the very definition of irrational.

(Fear of hand grenades: rational. Fear of pictures of hand grenades: irrational.)

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**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/82 "2016-04-30T02:05:53Z")

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> [@Trinopus](#):
>
> To be fair, it is irrational, like all phobias. There is zero rational reason to be afraid of speaking before a crowd. What are they going to do? Charge the stage and beat you up?

Disagree.

Social standing is still massively important to humans, and public speaking is one of the few ways that social standing could change very quickly.  
I might say something daft, or someone might point out an error I’ve made, and people could associate me with that one stupid mistake for a long time. Let alone the whole presentation going pair-shaped.  
Conversely a good presentation could see me gain respect among many people at the same time, with implications for my career, the careers of other people around me (e.g. giving presentations to potential customers / external clients) friendships etc in one fell swoop.

We feel nerves in any high-stakes situation. So if it makes sense to be nervous about anything, it makes sense to be nervous about public speaking.

As I alluded upthread, public speaking was a learned skill for me. I don’t get nervous now only because I understand crowds (e.g. how to keep a crowd’s attention), and because I have learned how to deal with certain bad situations.  
Before I knew all this, you bet I was nervous about public speaking, and that makes sense.

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**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/83 "2016-04-30T02:12:41Z")

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> [@Northern\_Piper](#):
>
> I’m curious - was it the topic, or the audience, **Poysyn**?
> 
> (for our American posters, the Chief of Defence Staff is the top soldier in the Canadian Armed Forces, equivalent to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff)

A little of both, really. I don’t get an audience with the CDS very often 😉

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**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/84 "2016-04-30T09:32:30Z")

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> [@Trinopus](#):
>
> To be fair, it is irrational, like all phobias. There is zero rational reason to be afraid of speaking before a crowd. What are they going to do?

laugh at me and/or think I’m an idiot.

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**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/85 "2016-04-30T13:43:13Z")

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> [@Trinopus](#):
>
> To be fair, it is irrational, like all phobias. There is zero rational reason to be afraid of speaking before a crowd. What are they going to do? Charge the stage and beat you up?

There’s a shit load of stuff that can happen that doesn’t involve violence. I’m betting 99.9% of people who are afraid of public speaking aren’t worried about getting beat up. Because most people aren’t idiotic crazies.

I’m guessing that most people in this thread are talking about public speaking in the context of work. Giving a crappy presentation can be the difference between getting a promotion or not getting it. Or even getting hired. I once had to give a mock lecture when I was interviewing for an adjunct position. If I had bombed it, then I would have missed out on an excellent opportunity.

Moreover, a crappy presentation in front of the wrong audience can be a very bad thing for your organization. I work in government, and our public meetings are often filled with citizens who already have their minds made up that we don’t know what the hell we’re doing. If you get up there and start mumbling and fumbling, well, you’ve just confirmed their suspicions. Which means there won’t be buy-in for the project and your agency will be slammed in the media. There are no consequences if you fuck up in front of Toastmasters. I’m giving a talk at a professional conference next week, and the stakes are low enough that I’m not worried about what will happen if I flop. But you bet I’d be more nervous if I was meeting with hostile stakeholders. I’ve got a million eye-rolls for someone doesn’t grok why this would be the case.

> [@](#):
>
> No one here is denying this at all, in any way. If you have that phobia, or that discomfort, then that should be respected. No one should be compelled to speak in public if they don’t want to. (Just as no one should have spiders put in their face if they don’t want that.)
> 
> You respect my phobia, and I’ll respect yours. But don’t try to pretend that phobias are anything other than irrational. They’re the very definition of irrational.

If I’m afraid of getting mugged while walking around downtown Richmond at 11:30 PM, I’m not suffering from a phobia since my fear is _reasonable_. You do realize that there are reasonable fears and unreasonable fears, correct? Being afraid to give a talk in public can be totally reasonable under certain circumstances.

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**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/86 "2016-04-30T16:53:09Z")

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I enjoy developing presentations because it’s way to put my creativity and knack for writing stories to good use. I also get a high from _giving_ presentations on my work.

Often times people who fear presentations are those that don’t do well at it. As with any skill, you can improve at this. But knowing how to structure and deliver an effective presentation relies on intuitive judgement, and people who know or feel like they lack this judgement have good reason to not want this advertised to the whole world.

I’m pretty good at it, and yet still, my nerves may show depending on the venue, audience, and stakes involved. It bothers me when my voice gets weak and trembly, but I don’t let that stand in the way of me doing what needs to be done.

If presentations are a job responsibility, it’s the hiring official’s fault if they don’t screen out employees who can’t handle this duty without falling apart. In my work, I wouldn’t say presentations are a routine requirement, but its unlikely you will advance in the organization if you shy away from doing them. So I would only be annoyed by someone’s aversion to public speaking if they failed to connect this aversion with the few developmental opportunities given to them and they complained about being stuck in their positions or being under recognized.

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**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2016, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/87 "2016-04-30T18:56:02Z")

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> [@you\_with\_the\_face](#):
>
> Often times people who fear presentations are those that don’t do well at it. As with any skill, you can improve at this. But knowing how to structure and deliver an effective presentation relies on intuitive judgement, and people who know or feel like they lack this judgement have good reason to not want this advertised to the whole world.

It doesn’t have to be intuitive at all. A good presentation tells a story. Once you understand that, you can (and I have) turned terrible slide sets into good ones. There are the usual guidelines for slide format, of course, but knowing how to tell the story is critical piece number 1.  
Critical piece number 2 is just energy. Some people are naturally good speakers and some people are naturally crappy speakers. Classes can help, but it takes a lot of work.

> [@](#):
>
> If presentations are a job responsibility, it’s the hiring official’s fault if they don’t screen out employees who can’t handle this duty without falling apart. In my work, I wouldn’t say presentations are a routine requirement, but its unlikely you will advance in the organization if you shy away from doing them. So I would only be annoyed by someone’s aversion to public speaking if they failed to connect this aversion with the few developmental opportunities given to them and they complained about being stuck in their positions or being under recognized.

When I was in Bell Labs all employment candidates who were getting PhDs (most of them) had to present a thesis review of their work. It made a tremendous amount of difference. Any job requiring presentation skills probably should make a presentation part of the interview process. When I did mine we were still using vu-graphs, it is much easier now.

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**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\
**Post date:** [May 1, 2016, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/88 "2016-05-01T14:42:18Z")

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I have always been terribly shy meeting people in person. But I’ve been called on to speak in public many times, and I’ve never felt stage fright, took to public speaking like it was the most natural thing, and I don’t know why. Just the peculiarities in the way talents are distributed among human individuals.

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**Author:** ![Sleel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/73ab20/32.png) [@Sleel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleel)\
**Post date:** [May 2, 2016, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/89 "2016-05-02T02:09:08Z")

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The reason most people freak out about public speaking is that being the center of attention to our monkey mind means either a potential great reward like leadership, or possible exile and death. Being ridiculed is a horrible experience for most people because it’s one short step from that to being on the receiving end of a dung-and-rock flinging exit party. The majority of our emotions are driven by a more primitive part of our brains that is not especially amenable to the more recently evolved systems that deal with reasoning and abstract thought.

If you are someone who is not bothered by public speaking, you are either 1) Pretty odd, and probably one of the first against the wall when the revolution comes against all wrong-thinking people who do not properly smear blue mud into their navels like the rest of society, or 2) Have experience with public speaking that has generally reassured you that you will not be tarred-and-feathered, dragged off stage, or torn limb-from-limb by an angry audience.

I’m 2, with a bit of 1. I was a shy, weird, moderately introverted kid who occasionally got bullied for being so, and so eventually decided society was shit, and people can fuck right the hell off because they’re all kind of stupid and don’t think for themselves. (I got better. A little.) I decided to do competitive speech in my last year of high school on a whim, partially because I knew my weaknesses and wanted to eradicate as many of them as I could. Deciding not to care what people think, and addressing the experience and preparation part of the problem head-on made a huge difference.

After graduating from university, I’ve been either teaching, instructing martial arts, or coaching (the latter two are just teaching with movement involved) for most of my adult life. Every single day as a teacher is public speaking on a small scale. I’ve also had a few formal speaking engagements where I’ve presented to larger audiences; I think about 1,000 people was the largest so far.

If you have experience and practice, it usually gets much less stressful. If you are prepared, it also gets much less stressful. Here’s a [confirmed procrastinator](http://waitbutwhy.com/2013/10/why-procrastinators-procrastinate.html) on preparing a [TED Talk on procrastination](http://waitbutwhy.com/2016/03/doing-a-ted-talk-the-full-story.html).

Like he pointed out, the sweet spot is where you know the material cold, and have either completely memorized it, or have so internalized it that you can essentially re-create your awesomely interesting phrasing and flow spontaneously in the moment. Partially prepared is death for a time-constrained presentation. You are almost guaranteed to fuck it up in those circumstances. Even so, you can still give a good presentation by having the experience to keep rolling and not freeze when problems happen, but ideally you want to be completely prepared and rehearsed.

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**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\
**Post date:** [May 2, 2016, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/90 "2016-05-02T11:54:26Z")

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> [@Voyager](#):
>
> It doesn’t have to be intuitive at all. A good presentation tells a story.

I disagree that it isn’t intuitive, at least in part. Knowing what makes a good story good and executing that is something difficult to teach someone once they reach adulthood and have developed certain communication habits.

I work with people who have had all kinds of trainings, workshops, and one-on-one coaching from me and others. They might have improved from poor to okay, but getting them to truly great is near impossible because they just don’t have a natural sense for structure, flow, and clarity. And these are really bright people!

That said, those who are willing to get training are usually fine with doing presentations, even if they are ineffective ones. Most audiences aren’t going to hurl tomatoes at a bad presenter, so unless someone goes up there and flubs every bullet point, their talk will be good enough.

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**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2016, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-else-who-doesnt-get-bothered-by-public-speaking-at-all/753193/91 "2016-05-03T23:13:06Z")

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I get called on to speak occasionally. I tend to fret and worry about it…right up until it’s time to get started. And then, suddenly, it’s as though a switch gets thrown, and after that I’m relaxed and cheerful.

I always think of it as that, when the time comes, I’m too _busy_ to be worried any longer.

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