# Anyone ever invite an ex to their wedding? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 8, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613 "2011-09-08T14:04:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/1 "2011-09-08T14:04:45Z")
How did it go? How did the discussion go? What were the guest reactions? ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/2 "2011-09-08T14:09:20Z")
I did, but he didn’t come, because he lived 1200 miles away and his mom was in the middle of dying of cancer. He is still apologizing to me for not coming, 2 years later. Of course, I dated him more than half my life ago. But in my circle of friends it wouldn’t be at all unusual to invite an ex and nobody would think twice about it. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/3 "2011-09-08T14:30:11Z")
Not an ex-wife (I don’t have one of those) but an ex GF. It went fine. My wife had met her while the ex and I were dating- my wife and I knew each other socially at that point. They didn’t particularly like each other, but that was mainly because my now-wife was jealous of my then-GF. Anyhoo, my ex invited me and my fiancee to her wedding, and we attended. A few months later we invited my ex and her husband to our wedding. Everything was fine, no drama. Wife and ex got along just fine. The other guests didn’t care. Why would they? Wasn’t there just a thread about this? ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/4 "2011-09-08T14:41:17Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > The other guests didn’t care. Why would they? > > Wasn’t there just a thread about this? I just read an article on wedding etiquette that said it might be awkward for guests who knew about the past relationship. Some said that weddings are no place for exes and others said only under certain circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/5 "2011-09-08T14:51:46Z")
Sure, one “serious” ex and two “flings” were at my wedding. I’m going to said serious ex’s (second) wedding next month, too. It’s kind of different in a way as we’re all schoolfriends who have stayed in touch. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/6 "2011-09-08T16:59:59Z")
My ex-GF invited me (and my then-GF, current wife) to her wedding. We went; it was fine. No sense in holding grudges, and I like my wife better anyway. I did consider saying something to the groom going thru the reception line like “remember, she likes it rough” or “watch out for the herpes” but thought the better of it. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/7 "2011-09-08T17:11:17Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > My ex-GF invited me (and my then-GF, current wife) to her wedding. We went; it was fine. No sense in holding grudges, and I like my wife better anyway. > > I did consider saying something to the groom going thru the reception line like “remember, she likes it rough” or “watch out for the herpes” but thought the better of it. > > Regards, > Shodan Whom did she get the herpes from? ---
**Author:** ![fachverwirrt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/94ad74/32.png) [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/8 "2011-09-08T18:06:47Z")
One of my groomsmen was an ex-boyfriend of my wife’s. ---
**Author:** ![Feyrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/fbc32d/32.png) [@Feyrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feyrat)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/9 "2011-09-08T18:14:45Z")
I was the “best man” at my ex-boyfriend’s wedding to the girl we broke up over. The two of them were the witnesses at my wedding. We’re a little unusual. ---
**Author:** ![WreckingCrew](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wreckingcrew/32/4080_2.png) [@WreckingCrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WreckingCrew)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/10 "2011-09-08T20:02:45Z")
Yeah, my college girlfriend was at my wedding. We had broken up years before, but remained friends. We had also dated several years, so she was someone important in my life that I wanted at my wedding. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/11 "2011-09-08T20:57:04Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > I did consider saying something to the groom going thru the reception line like “remember, she likes it rough” or “watch out for the herpes” but thought the better of it. I would rather raise my hand when the guys asks if anyone knows “why these two may not be joined in matrimony” and just say, “oh, never mind.” ---
**Author:** ![emmaliminal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7bcc69/32.png) [@emmaliminal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emmaliminal)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/12 "2011-09-08T21:12:29Z")
My husband and I met when his ex (-girlfriend, not -wife) set us up on, essentially, a blind date; almost eight years later, we had her sort of give us away to each other at the wedding. At least one other of his ex-girlfriends was also a guest. I don’t think any of my exes were there, but that’s mostly because we had the ceremony near where he grew up and lived as a young adult, but 3000 miles from where I did that. At least a few of mine were invited. ---
**Author:** ![Soliloquy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@Soliloquy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soliloquy)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/13 "2011-09-08T21:48:47Z")
My current beau’s closest friend is my ex-boyfriend and is still one if my closest friends. I attended his wedding several years ago, and he will most certainly attend mine. There is a possibility that he will even perform the ceremony. If not that, he will be the best man, should we go the route of a wedding party. I’m not the only woman they shared. And I was kinda involved with the first girl they shared myself, for a short time, even. (This all happened many long years ago, and is a very long, complicated story.) And you thought you were weird… ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/14 "2011-09-08T21:56:38Z")
No, but my newly-wed and I went to stay with an ex of mine - or more specifically, at a resort in Mexico he was managing - for the honeymoon. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2011, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/15 "2011-09-08T22:25:29Z")
> [@fachverwirrt](#): > > One of my groomsmen was an ex-boyfriend of my wife’s. Hi honey! I didn’t know you were a Doper! ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2011, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/16 "2011-09-09T06:40:22Z")
We invited my ex & his gf to our wedding, and he invited us when they got married. No problems as our friends were all “in common.” We’re now Friends on Facebook. ---
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2011, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/17 "2011-09-09T14:50:15Z")
An ex of mine invited me to her wedding. I went with my new girlfriend but now wish I hadn’t. If I had to do it again I’d go to the wedding ceremony to show respect but not the reception. I just felt awkward the whole time. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2011, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/18 "2011-09-09T14:52:42Z")
This thread was just above “Bad Wedding Ideas.” Of course now I’ve ruined it by posting in this one but it was just too perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Minnie\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Minnie\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minnie_Luna)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2011, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/19 "2011-09-09T16:22:47Z")
My husband and I were guests at his ex-girlfriend’s wedding, in fact my husband’s sister and mother were guests as well. She and her father were guests at our post-wedding party as well, her husband was invited, but did not come. Nobody blinked an eye. Background: She and my husband dated in high school and college. During this period of time, my husband’s father died of cancer, about a year later GF’s mother joined a cult and left their family. It was a hard time for both of them. She “adopted” my mother-in-law as a mother figure and my husband saw her father as a father figure through those years that they were together. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2011, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613/20 "2011-09-09T16:40:16Z")
I wouldn’t. But then I don’t stay in contact with either of my exes. (I don’t even know if my first ex is alive or not at this point) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-ever-invite-an-ex-to-their-wedding/595613.md?page=2)