# Anyone know any people for non-religious reasons waited until marriage to have sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 16, 2020, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052 "2020-02-16T23:04:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/21 "2020-02-17T18:16:34Z")
> [@SuntanLotion](#): > > If a woman wants to be married, she should wait until marriage to have sex. Why should a man marry her when hes getting everything he wants, especially if they live together? Women give away their power too quickly nowadays. Of course, men will say, well, I want to see if we’re compatible. Would you go to a car dealership and say I want to test drive this car for a couple years, if I don’t like it, I’ll bring it back and not pay you anything. > > me, I’ve been “religious” for 40 years, and every time I had sex outside of marriage, I didn’t enjoy it. I was married, and did enjoy sex with him. > > I was stupid enough to have sex with me ex(we’ve been apart for a year) and my tests kept coming back slightly irregular at my gyno’s. I went in October and all was good. I told the nurse, See what happens when you don’t have sex! She laughed. So if a person never marries, that person can’t have a sex life. ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/22 "2020-02-17T20:36:36Z")
No, unmarried people can have all the sex they want, its not my business. I highly recommend many books by Michelle McKinney Hammond, who gave me these ideas for women to have self-respect. And, I am very happy thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/23 "2020-02-17T20:55:42Z")
> [@SuntanLotion](#): > > No, unmarried people can have all the sex they want, its not my business. I highly recommend many books by Michelle McKinney Hammond, who gave me these ideas for women to have self-respect. And, I am very happy thanks. It’s not your business but you think it’s wrong. No one accused you of being in the sex stopping business. So women’s self respect is tied into not having sex before marriage? You can’t have self-respect if you have sex? Does the self-respect start at the I Do or is it when the marriage license is signed? ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/24 "2020-02-17T22:40:19Z")
I was raised in a very secular Jewish family, as was my wife until she was 11 when her parents divorced and her mother married a very religious man. But we were both atheists. Nonetheless, for no good reason except that casual sex was not much practiced in the early 60s, we were both virgins on our wedding night. Not that we didn’t come to enjoy sex a great deal. Our 56th anniversary is in less than a month. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/25 "2020-02-17T22:58:14Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#): > > I was raised in a very secular Jewish family, as was my wife until she was 11 when her parents divorced and her mother married a very religious man. But we were both atheists. Nonetheless, for no good reason except that casual sex was not much practiced in the early 60s, we were both virgins on our wedding night. Not that we didn’t come to enjoy sex a great deal. Our 56th anniversary is in less than a month. I guess we know how you’ll be spending your anniversary! ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2020, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/26 "2020-02-17T23:25:41Z")
Me - I’m a man and I’m _well_ aware that if I had a kid out of wedlock I’d be shafted on child support and shafted on custody - not that I want to have to deal with raising a baby on my own anyway, even part-time. Of course, having seen what’s happened to both my brother and my best friend, I’m not sure being married would really easy my worries either. (Both of them got married, had a kid, and then the woman instigated a divorce. In my friend’s case the divorce happened within weeks of getting out of the hospital and I can’t shake the idea that getting child support was the long game all along.) And aside from the paranoia and cynicism described above, I also have a sentimental side that wants to save the intimate physical stuff for somebody I actually love. And yes, I know I will never meet such a person. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2020, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/27 "2020-02-18T14:10:14Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > In my friend’s case the divorce happened within weeks of getting out of the hospital and I can’t shake the idea that getting child support was the long game all along.) Jeez, how much is she getting? Plus it does come with a massive drawback… ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2020, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/28 "2020-02-18T15:32:47Z")
The current **Girl Wonder** was a virgin when we started going out. Her decision wasn’t religious-based. It was more of a situation where she had built it up in her head as an act between a long-dedicated couple. She’d never even French-kissed or anything. We’re engaged, and those old taboos no longer exist. We have an I-assume-normal sex life. ETA: She was 30 when we were first together. That was last year. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2020, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052/29 "2020-02-18T19:59:18Z")
> [@SuntanLotion](#): > > No, unmarried people can have all the sex they want, its not my business. I highly recommend many books by Michelle McKinney Hammond, who gave me these ideas for women to have self-respect. And, I am very happy thanks. Author of 101 Ways to Get His Attention. That’s real self respect, right there. Leader of a ministry. Uh huh. My daughters had plenty of self respect before they got married and still have it. And I’m happy to say they are both atheists so they weren’t affected by any of your religious bullstuff. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-know-any-people-for-non-religious-reasons-waited-until-marriage-to-have-sex/848052.md?page=1)