# anyone wanna help out a newbie? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 27, 2000, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613 "2000-10-27T16:11:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![spedmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@spedmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spedmonk)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/21 "2000-10-28T20:14:46Z")
bump šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/22 "2000-10-28T20:19:40Z")
Oh look at you **spedmonk** Now youā€™re just posting your pad count. šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/23 "2000-10-28T20:20:45Z")
I meant padding your count post. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2000, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/24 "2000-10-28T20:21:49Z")
I meant padding your post count!šŸ˜ƒ (hehehe - sorry, I wonā€™t do that anymore) ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/25 "2000-10-29T01:17:26Z")
If you want to look at an example of a pretty good non-retail ebusiness type website, check out [marriott.com](http://marriott.com). I work for a division of this very large company and I think that we have some darned good web-designers on our stuff. The online reservations system is SO COOL! We can even find out if there are any rooms available on a given date at a given place for the employee discount rate. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/26 "2000-10-29T03:29:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by spedmonk \* > **[li]no, Iā€™m not going to do a porn site, sorry dropzone**[/li][/QUOTE] > > Nor am I, as anybody knows who actually READS the thread! Or even the title. > **dropzone** , I really donā€™t think the prof. would appreciate a sleazy business, but thank you for the offer. Besides, its a pretend company. > \*\* Pretend? Soā€™s mine. Nothing has been done to create it beyond mentioning it here. Marriott and IBM, on the other hand, exist. :mildly insane rant: But I suppose your prof is one of those ivory-tower types with no knowledge of nor interest in those of us at the ground floor of ecommerce and who only think a company counts if itā€™s on the Fortune 100, no matter how poorly it handles its web presence (see Chase Mahattan). :/mildly insane rant: ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/27 "2000-10-29T03:50:50Z")
I read your OP and thought deeply, **Spedmonk/Katie**. Reflection and meditation by the moon-washed lake of the floating lotus yielded this insight: damned if I know. Canā€™t offer a danged thing about your real question, though some really quality bullshit came to mind about drifting fog, nice imagery about fern fronds fingering mercury-dense waters, etc. In other words, I donā€™t have a danged intelligent thing to say toward your question, but offer a hearty welcome anyway. Thatā€™s the nice thing about this place: we fight ignorance but we all do it from delighfully oblique angles. Welcome! Veb ---
**Author:** ![spedmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@spedmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spedmonk)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/28 "2000-10-29T05:54:36Z")
**dropzone:** > [@](#): > > Pretend? Soā€™s mine. Nothing has been done to create it beyond mentioning it here. Marriott and IBM, on the > other hand, exist. See, what we have to do is interview someone who works for a ā€œrealā€ company, and look at the web page and stuff, and then create our own ā€œpretendā€ company modeled after the company we studied. So, while I do appreciate the offer, studying your ā€œpretendā€ company isnā€™t really a viable option.šŸ™‚ > [@](#): > > So, spedmonk, are you going to back up your claims to femininity with nude photos? Since Iā€™m not in the porn business, maybe you could sent them to mrblue92. :devilish ;0 : Sorry, I donā€™t have any nudie pics (not that I would post them anyway) Even if I did post something, how would you know it was me? I could post pictures of a porn star for all you know!šŸ†’ > [@](#): > > I am not getting into pornography, but am instead getting into the less-sleazy-but-less-remunerative sleazy occult biz. > [@](#): > > > [@](#): > > > > Originally posted by spedmonk > > no, Iā€™m not going to do a porn site, sorry dropzone > > Nor am I, as anybody knows who actually READS the thread! Or even the title. itā€™s porn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . JUST KIDDING šŸ˜ƒ **TVeblen:** > [@](#): > > I read your OP and thought deeply, Spedmonk/Katie. Reflection and meditation by the moon-washed lake of the floating lotus yielded this insight: damned if I know. > > Canā€™t offer a danged thing about your real question, though some really quality bullshit came to mind about drifting fog, nice imagery about fern fronds fingering mercury-dense waters, etc. > > In other words, I donā€™t have a danged intelligent thing to say toward your question, but offer a hearty welcome anyway. Thatā€™s the nice thing about this place: we fight ignorance but we all do it from delighfully oblique angles. > > ``` > Welcome! > > Veb > > ``` Thatā€™s why this is such a great place! Thanks for the welcome! **Crunchy Frog:** AM NOT!!! šŸ˜› ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/29 "2000-10-29T06:03:19Z")
But I am. ---
**Author:** ![spedmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@spedmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spedmonk)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/30 "2000-10-29T06:06:59Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by dropzone_ > But I am. šŸ˜• you are what? ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/31 "2000-10-29T06:14:47Z")
[sub]I gotta explain everything to this chick[/sub] **Crunchy Frog** said: > [@](#): > > I meant padding your post count! Then you said: > [@](#): > > AM NOT!!! to which I replied: > [@](#): > > But I am meaning I was padding my post count with a gratuitous post. Sheesh. šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![MysterEcks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f475e1/32.png) [@MysterEcks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysterEcks)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2000, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/32 "2000-10-29T06:27:38Z")
**DRY** said: > [@](#): > > I donā€™t know shit from shinola I have always wanted to have identical twins named Shit and Shinola. (Though my ex-wife wasnā€™t fond of the idea, for some reason.) Welcome aboard, **spedmonk**. ---
**Author:** ![Necros](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/necros/32/11086_2.png) [@Necros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Necros)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2000, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/33 "2000-10-30T15:49:59Z")
**spedmonk** , you are correct about where I work. I am in Software Group. If youā€™d like, feel free to email me at [necros@gtemail.net](mailto:necros@gtemail.net). ---
**Author:** ![spedmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@spedmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spedmonk)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2000, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/34 "2000-11-05T18:34:11Z")
**Update!** -cause you guys are just dying to know šŸ˜ƒ I interviewed mouthbreather. He works for a company called XXXXXX, and even though heā€™s just a ā€œlowly engineerā€ he was a huge help in making me understand how the system works. **Thank you mouthbreather!!!** Now itā€™s time for me to start designing the website for my mock company, so I might need to recruit some help for that part too. Basically just opinions on the layout and stuff like that. Thanks to everyone who offered their help to a lowly newbie šŸ™‚ Katie p.s. I really need a sigā€¦any ideas? _[edited to remove company name at request of mouthbreather - ub]_ ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2000, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/35 "2000-11-05T18:44:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by spedmonk \* > \*\*I really need a sigā€¦any ideas? \*\* Bite me, newbie. šŸ˜‰ Sorry, had to do it one more time. Give me a day or two, Iā€™ll think of something. Or you could just stick around and wait for something to happen, like with my latest sig. ---
**Author:** ![Nymysys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f6c823/32.png) [@Nymysys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymysys)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2000, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/36 "2000-11-05T18:46:45Z")
Ummmā€¦since crisis has been averted and situations are under control, I just wanted to say ā€œhiā€ from one newbie to another. So, HI! ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2000, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613/37 "2000-11-06T15:07:05Z")
> [@](#): > > I interviewed mouthbreather. ā€¦he was a huge help in making me understand how the system works. Thank you mouthbreather!!! Youā€™re welcome, glad I could help. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/anyone-wanna-help-out-a-newbie/38613.md?page=1)