# Apparently I was a moderator for thirty seconds **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 22, 2004, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738 "2004-03-22T18:45:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/21 "2004-03-23T05:41:00Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > I POSTED, yet I was too scared to READ the secret forums!? As you should be, because – if this particular installation of vBulletin is configured for it – the mods and administrators will know _exactly_ where you’re lurking at any given time. vB 3.0 can be set up to display users viewing a forum or thread. For instance, scroll down to the bottom of [this page](http://www.cyburbia.org/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=23) or [this page](http://www.cyburbia.org/forums/showthread.php?t=11183). As with anything else in vBulletin, the feature can be turned on or off for various user groups. ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/22 "2004-03-23T13:38:32Z")
there are no moderator forums i was completely mistaken i saw nothing unusual everybody calm down there is nothing to see _:turns to reveal lobotomy scar:_ > [@Lobsang](#): > > I POSTED, yet I was too scared to READ the secret forums!? Not me, baby. I went to the problems thread that included “j” and searched for “js.” No hits. When I clicked to check the second (and last) page, my access was denied. So…I’m fairly clean, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![drewbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drewbert/32/15890_2.png) [@drewbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewbert)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/23 "2004-03-23T13:47:19Z")
> [@screech-owl](#): > > Gotcha all beat. I have a SDMB “STAFF” mug that was sent to me when I ordered my SDMB coffee mug! > > …Or do they all say “STAFF”? It doesn’t say “STAFF”. You only think it does. It stands for Seen Traversing A Forbidden Forum. You’re being tracked. I’d get rid of it if I were you. ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/24 "2004-03-23T13:59:39Z")
> [@js\_africanus](#): > > there are no moderator forums i was completely mistaken i saw nothing unusual everybody calm down there is nothing to see > > _:turns to reveal lobotomy scar:_ Thats right. We were just all dreaming. Honest. Please believe me or they’ll hurt us again. _sobs_ ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/25 "2004-03-23T14:14:48Z")
Well that’s right son, back in the early time they say that the moderators walked the earth, just like men and women. They were said to have a secret place where they practiced their unworldly devices. Some of the chartered ones claim that the secret forum was discovered but because of the curse upon none it survived to tell its secrets. Cecil says this is crap so never speak of it again. Case closed. ---
**Author:** ![Anonymous\_Coward](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/94ad74/32.png) [@Anonymous\_Coward](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anonymous_Coward)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/26 "2004-03-23T14:56:09Z")
I saw it as well and reported **Lobsang** ’s post (cuz you can’t report your own posts). That was the empty forum. I didn’t even go into the other forum because I didn’t want to be the first banned charter member :). ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/27 "2004-03-23T16:57:42Z")
So if a near-death experience is a NDE, was this a NME? Instead of seeing the light and moving towards it, you saw secret boards and moved toward them? ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/28 "2004-03-23T17:16:20Z")
> [@Amanita](#): > > So if a near-death experience is a NDE, was this a NME? > > Instead of seeing the light and moving towards it, you saw secret boards and moved toward them? Yeah, that’s a pretty good picture of it. Except that I didn’t have to get hit by a truck to facilitate it. Well, that and it never happened. Shhhh… ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/29 "2004-03-23T19:24:15Z")
Lucky bastards. I paid up and can’t even post! I hope they didn’t just take my money and say “sucker!” ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/30 "2004-03-23T19:45:00Z")
> [@js\_africanus](#): > > Not me, baby. I went to the problems thread that included “j” and searched for “js.” No hits. When I clicked to check the second (and last) page, my access was denied. So…I’m fairly clean, I guess. I confess. Me, too. And no hits. I feel like such a goody two-shoes. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/31 "2004-03-23T22:39:32Z")
> [@js\_africanus](#): > > :turns to reveal lobotomy scar: You want a piece of Juicy Fruit? ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/32 "2004-03-23T23:47:18Z")
[Man in Black who looks oddly like Jesse Ventura]It wasn’t a secret forum, it was the planet Venus. Nothing more than the planet Venus. Many reports of secret forums have turned out to actually be the planet Venus. If anyone asks you what you saw, you tell them it was the planet Venus.[/MIBWLOLJV] ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/33 "2004-03-24T00:45:11Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > You want a piece of Juicy Fruit? Woosh. ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/34 "2004-03-24T11:20:22Z")
> [@sturmhauke](#): > > [Man in Black who looks oddly like Jesse Ventura]It wasn’t a secret forum, it was the planet Venus. Nothing more than the planet Venus. Many reports of secret forums have turned out to actually be the planet Venus. If anyone asks you what you saw, you tell them it was the planet Venus.[/MIBWLOLJV] It was the planet venus. It was the planet venus. It was the planet venus… ---
**Author:** ![Berkut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@Berkut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Berkut)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/35 "2004-03-25T04:29:38Z")
> [@elmwood](#): > > Most vBulletin-based bulletin boards are set up by their administrators to include moderator-only subforums. If it’s anything like my board, it’s where spam and inappropriate posts are redirected, and moderators discuss board administration issues; user warnings, possible threads about to burst into flames, and the like. Kinda’ boring, actually. See, now you’ve shattered my idea of what the mod forums are like. I pictured a smoke filled room, filled with gangsters, discussing board matters past cigars clenched in their teeth. Like the Sopranos or something. ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/36 "2004-03-25T05:07:40Z")
> [@GMRyujin](#): > > I, too, walked that Promised Land of the Mods. Now I anticipate the arrival of **Coldfire** and **Lynn Bodoni** who’ll drag me off, MiB style, and use the blinky thing to make me think it was swamp gas. > > REMEMBER MY STORY! Nah, that’s just paranoia. We don’t even bother with frills anymore. It’s kinda like all those aliens perplexed and grossed out by anal probes. We did have to retire the goat, though, so just come along quietly now… ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738/37 "2004-03-25T13:30:41Z")
> [@TVeblen](#): > > We did have to retire the goat, though, so just come along quietly now… Why, do you need some tin cans chewed on? Oh…wait… _:runs frantically:_ Arrrrg! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-i-was-a-moderator-for-thirty-seconds/235738.md?page=1)