# Apparently, I'm the only one in my house who can: **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 16, 2006, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254 "2006-01-16T19:15:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mr.Goob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c77e96/32.png) [@Mr.Goob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Goob)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/21 "2006-01-16T21:25:43Z")
I’m not the only one with freeloading fuzzie monsters. I can’t expect them to do the dishes or change the toilet paper rolls, as they don’t use them. Would it be too much for them to iron my shirts? Half the time they are a wrinkled mess because of somebody sleeping in the laundry basket. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/22 "2006-01-16T21:29:52Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Fill the ice cube box, not to mention the equally difficult and time-consuming task of re-filling the trays with water. That’s the number one reason why we decided to spend the extra couple of bucks for the ice maker in our last fridge. > [@](#): > > Change the toilet role when it’s empty instead of getting a new role out, using some, and then leaving it sitting on the counter directly above the empty spindle. Okay, that’s pretty bad. > [@](#): > > Turn off lights in empty rooms. Hey, now. How else would **Mrs. Magill** know I had been in the garage last night, if I didn’t leave the lights on all night. > [@](#): > > Take the jam-packed, overflowing kitchen garbage out to the garage. Okay - the garbage stack is a huge pet peeve of mine. Before we got married, **Mrs. Magill** (a very neat person - except for this one area) would almost never take her garbage out. I would go over to her house, use a kleenex, and find this six-foot stack of garbage in her pantry. After dating for two years, and being married for four an a half years, she still doesn’t take out the garbage unless it is threatening to collapse and seriously hurt someone. She does however replace the liner when I take the garbage out. Baby steps. > [@](#): > > Remove items from the fridge that are obviously well past the edible date. (Cranberry sauce and gravy from Christmas last night, for example.) Preventing garbage avalanches is my job - removing the science experiments from the fridge is hers. > [@](#): > > Clean the toilets! > > Clean the bath/shower! Apparently, sometime in the last four and a half years, I had volunteered to scour the tub and toilets. I wish I could remember doing that. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/23 "2006-01-16T22:19:21Z")
One caveat: Do not try to train other members of the household to clean up their messes by refusing to do it yourself. Trust me, it won’t work. You’ll drive yourself crazy by trying to live in a pig sty, then won’t be able to stand it anymore, and end up cleaning it yourself. At least that’s what my wife says. ---
**Author:** ![BlueKangaroo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3d9bf3/32.png) [@BlueKangaroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlueKangaroo)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/24 "2006-01-16T22:34:01Z")
**PoorYorick’s Wife!** She’s right. However, you might advise her to let it pile up for awhile (as long as you can stand it, and let it get fairly big, at least 8 milk jugs and a pile of dishes, as an example), then clean it up while her spouse is asleep (or gone). Then when the spouse gets home, make a HUGE deal about the situation, complete with **RANTS!** , **WILD GESTICULATIONS!** and **DRAGGING THE SPOUSE BODILY!** to each area cleaned. Then again, you might not. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/25 "2006-01-16T22:39:23Z")
> [@UncleBeer](#): > > Frankly, I’m inclined to think of the toilet as a single-purpose device. What other roles do you have in mind for it? Fondue pot? Goldfish bowl? Rice steamer? Note to self: NEVER go to **Leaffan** and/or **UncleBeer** s’ houses for a meal of fish, rice and fondue. ---
**Author:** ![Eleanor\_of\_Aquitaine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Eleanor\_of\_Aquitaine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleanor_of_Aquitaine)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/26 "2006-01-16T23:04:59Z")
> [@BlueKangaroo](#): > > **PoorYorick’s Wife!** She’s right. > > However, you might advise her to let it pile up for awhile (as long as you can stand it, and let it get fairly big, at least 8 milk jugs and a pile of dishes, as an example), then clean it up while her spouse is asleep (or gone). Then when the spouse gets home, make a HUGE deal about the situation, complete with **RANTS!** , **WILD GESTICULATIONS!** and **DRAGGING THE SPOUSE BODILY!** to each area cleaned. > > Then again, you might not. 😉 No, never do housework while spouse is away from home! You get no credit for that. If the housework isn’t witnessed by the spouse then it might as well have been done by fairies. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/27 "2006-01-16T23:07:19Z")
My boyfriend and I have a deal. Since I care and he doesn’t, I clean everything except for a few things: he does the dishes every night, cleans the bathroom/toilet, takes out the trash and helps me sweep and vacuum. There’s a catch, though. He only does these things when I tell him to. And it does not count if I tell him outside of the house because he WILL forget. If I do not tell him to do his jobs at the precisely correct time and place, they would never get done. But I do everything else without complaint because I make him do the worst jobs in the house. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/28 "2006-01-16T23:10:56Z")
> [@Eleanor of Aquitaine](#): > > No, never do housework while spouse is away from home! You get no credit for that. If the housework isn’t witnessed by the spouse then it might as well have been done by fairies. Bah, sometimes you can do it right in front of them and they’re totally oblivious. I swear, my SO has watched me do the dishes and scrub the kitchen floor and I might as well have been doing interpretive dance for all he noticed. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/29 "2006-01-16T23:11:39Z")
Mrs. Enipla does do most of the picking up around the house, but then, she is the one that leaves stuff laying out most of the time. Now, nothing is like what I had to take care of last Friday. Does anyone have any idea what two energetic Border Collies can do to two king size feather pillows? I never would have believed that our whole bedroom could be 4 inches deep in feathers from that. I’m sure the dogs had great fun. It was a bit of a mess to try to pick up though. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/30 "2006-01-16T23:22:33Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > Bah, sometimes you can do it right in front of them and they’re totally oblivious. I swear, my SO has watched me do the dishes and scrub the kitchen floor and I might as well have been doing interpretive dance for all he noticed. Actually, when I’m on the couch I’ll lift my feet so my wife can vacuum under them. And I do it without complaint. ---
**Author:** ![JustAnotherGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/58f4c7/32.png) [@JustAnotherGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustAnotherGeek)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/31 "2006-01-16T23:26:25Z")
Thus far, I seem to be the only one capable of remembering which day the garbage needs to go out. (They come on Thursday morning; if there’s a holiday, it still goes out Wednesday night. It just sits on the curb for an extra day.) I am also the only one who seems to realize that you _are_ allowed to put dirty dishes _in_ the dishwasher _before_ there isn’t a scrap of counter space remaining. Strange, but true. I also have this bizzare notion that mounds of cat hair and dust on a wooden floor does not equal a carpet. I know, I know: that may seem strange to some pet owners, but I have my little ways. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/32 "2006-01-16T23:43:17Z")
When I married Papa T., he was living in Japan. He told me he’d cleaned the little WC room where the toilet lived as well as he cleaned a bathroom. I knew at that moment that cleaning bathrooms would be my job for all eternity; it took me literally _six hours_ with an old toothbrush, and even a toothpick for digging in the tiny crevices, to get all the nasty smell out of that 3x4 foot room. However, he does all the cooking, most of the laundry, and a lot of the picking up. So I consider it a fair trade. It really is a question of whose tolerance for what is higher/lower. We’ve worked out a system that works for both of us and splits the work quite evenly. Although some things he’s willing to do, like vacuuming, I’m loath to let him do because he has a real talent for breaking the vacuum cleaner. First time he ever used my nearly-new vacuum, he not only overfilled it to the point where you could smell the engine, but he broke the belt. I’m ready to put a husband-proof lock on it just to keep it safe from him. ---
**Author:** ![BlueKangaroo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3d9bf3/32.png) [@BlueKangaroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlueKangaroo)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/33 "2006-01-17T00:10:17Z")
> [@Eleanor of Aquitaine](#): > > No, never do housework while spouse is away from home! You get no credit for that. If the housework isn’t witnessed by the spouse then it might as well have been done by fairies. You know, I think **Antinor01** has it right; even if the spouse is in the house and watching, they may not notice the cleaning. Also, I think **Mama Tiger** ’s husband is using that time-honored spouse tradition of breaking something to get out of ever having to vacuum again. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/34 "2006-01-17T00:29:22Z")
> [@cerberus](#): > > Leave the empty rolls on the floor: free! cat! toys! > [@xbuckeye](#): > > Have I ever mentioned that I live alone with a cat? > [@Thudlow Boink](#): > > I can’t convince either of the cats to lift a finger to help me. > [@Mr. Goob](#): > > I’m not the only one with freeloading fuzzie monsters. > [@JustAnotherGeek](#): > > I also have this bizzare notion that mounds of cat hair and dust on a wooden floor does not equal a carpet. Look folks, you know the rules. Cat threads must have kittie pics. Don’t let this thread go down the toilet. ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/35 "2006-01-17T01:16:54Z")
The two kittens I am fostering have paid their keep by dusting under the bedroom furniture. There were dust bunnies under the dresser bigger than the kittens! However, this must soon come to an end because the little parasites are getting too fat to get under the furniture anymore. I expect any day now to come in an have to lift up the dresser or chest of drawers to let out a kitten who went under there for a nap and grew too much to get out while he was asleep. ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/36 "2006-01-17T01:30:25Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > Whilst all members of my household appear capable of changing the toilet roll, I appear to be the only one capable of putting the empty roll in the bin. Dear Lord. My brother changes the toliet roll with alacrity, but that’s all he ever does. Throw the empty ones away? He PILES up those empty rolls until they form a friggin’ pyramid. Can’t wait till he has to live by himself. Those empty toliet paper rolls will rival the Pyramids of Gaza ere long. ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/37 "2006-01-17T02:09:23Z")
Toilet rolls? _Kitty pics_?! Off to MPSIMS. ---
**Author:** ![ataraxy22](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ataraxy22/32/307_2.png) [@ataraxy22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ataraxy22)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/38 "2006-01-17T03:21:30Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > I’ve discovered a method of cleaning the bath/shower: > > – Don’t do anything for two years. Let liberal layer of dirt and soap scum ensue. > – Coat entire scum-encrusted area with Drano Gel. Let sit for 15 minutes. > – Rinse clean! I use oven cleaner on mine. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/39 "2006-01-17T04:53:08Z")
Right now, I’m the only one in my house with opposable thumbs, so it’s my job to open cat food cans, fill the water bowl and clean the litter box. Other than that, and a little petting, I’m not much use at all. ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2006, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254/40 "2006-01-17T06:20:07Z")
I put the not-on-the-roll toilet paper as far away from the toilet as possible. Eventually they learn that it is handy to have it near the actual toilet. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-im-the-only-one-in-my-house-who-can/340254.md?page=3)