# Apparently, my role is to help men find happiness... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 7, 2003, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183 "2003-01-07T21:12:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/21 "2003-01-08T21:16:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by epolo \* > \*\*Well, here I am. > Where’s my happiness? > … > [taps foot and looks at watch] > … > Nu? \*\* You seem to have skipped a few intermediate steps; we’re supposed to date first, and just when I’m falling for you big-time, _then_ you’re supposed to find happiness elsewhere. Or is this your roundabout way of asking me out? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/22 "2003-01-08T21:44:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Osip \* > My friends joke and call me a “spring board to better things.” In reference to my EMT past the term coined for me by a friend was “Paramedic of Broken Hearts” ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/23 "2003-01-08T21:58:29Z")
Hey, it happens on both sides. I talked about dating/flirted with (even unconsciously once) 3 women in an 18 month period. One is now married, 2 engaged. None had even met the guy before. Me? Going on a year without a date. (Not their fault) The Reader has personals too? Heck, the next board they add here might as well be personals. Some threads get close to it. Maybe you can commiserate with [Elmwood](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=153811). ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/24 "2003-01-08T22:05:46Z")
Actually, if you look at the thread, I did commiserate with **Elmwood.** Maybe he’ll read this one and feel better. For the lazy, you’ll find a link to the Reader Matches at [www.chreader.com](http://www.chreader.com). ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/25 "2003-01-08T22:08:46Z")
That’s [www.chireader.com](http://www.chireader.com). Maybe my problem is that I can’t type. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/26 "2003-01-08T22:11:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > \*\*Actually, if you look at the thread, I did commiserate with **Elmwood.** Maybe he’ll read this one and feel better. > > For the lazy, you’ll find a link to the Reader Matches at [www.chreader.com](http://www.chreader.com). \*\* So you did. I was lazy, just remembered the thread and linked. Sorry. I’m not in Chicago, so the personals wouldn’t help me (Hell, nothing will), just this was the first mention I saw of them. Most of us aren’t in the area, so we’ve never seen it. Heck, I don’t even see the column any more, the local dropped it. I could look around to see if another paper picked it up, but I can just see it online anyway. ---
**Author:** ![epolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@epolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epolo)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/27 "2003-01-08T23:51:38Z")
Take it in what sense thou wilt. I definitely could use a date. And I’ve been known to send women off into marriage before. Although more often I send them off to other women. ---
**Author:** ![TheLadyLion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d78d45/32.png) [@TheLadyLion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLadyLion)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2003, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/28 "2003-01-09T06:33:33Z")
OMG, **Eva Luna** , I thought I was the only one this happened to! I used to call myself “Miss Second-to-Last” because every man I had ever been serious about in my life would marry the next woman he dated after I was out of the picture. I made the decision to not be friends with the majority of them after the break up, usually because the breakups were bitter. But I would still hear about the “new girlfriend/Mrs.” from someone. In all honesty, nearly every time this happened, it turned out to be a Godsend that I WASN’T the one he ended up with! WHEW! Now I have found Mr. Right. Wanna hear something weird? Within two weeks of him and me setting up housekeeping together (yes, we’re living in sin), three old boyfriends contacted me! I hadn’t heard from one of them for about 4 years, and here he was calling me out of the blue! The ironic thing is that, because he is a professional jewelry artisan, we will be having him make my rings! It was still sweet to hear the disappointment in his voice when I told him I was engaged to be married. Did my heart good! :wally ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2003, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/29 "2003-01-10T01:27:38Z")
To the best of my knowledge, 5 of my 6 exes are now happily engaged in serious relationships, although only one of them is married. And in 3 of those cases, I am “Mr. Second-to-last”. On the plus side, I’m closing in on 500 posts on the SDMB, which should draw women like flies… right? ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2003, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/30 "2003-01-10T17:53:08Z")
**Eva Luna** how cruel of you to mention “blood” in front of the wounded (old Spanish saying). Write me down as the eternal Al Gore of love. Very good candidate but didn’t make it. It sucks. I tellsya. And of course every time I break up with an SO they contact me as soon as I recover to hint that live sucks without me. No kidding?! Why do they have to find out by themselves and not just take my word for it. ---
**Author:** ![jeevmon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@jeevmon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jeevmon)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2003, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/31 "2003-01-10T21:07:48Z")
When the “Rules Girl” meets the regular guy: [http://www.comedyave.com/hmc/hmc111301.htm](http://www.comedyave.com/hmc/hmc111301.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2003, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/32 "2003-01-24T00:47:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > [BOh, and **Osip,** where are you in Alabama? I’ve got a couple of friends there; maybe the wife knows some nice girl to fix you up with… \*\* err Just finally saw this… I am in Huntsville. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/33 "2003-03-06T21:51:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Osip \* > \*\*err Just finally saw this… I am in Huntsville. \*\* So’s my friend! Shall I e-mail you, or him, to see if he knows anyone? What are your criteria? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/34 "2003-03-06T22:13:58Z")
Heh… **EvaLuna** , if you’re prepared to accept a little fellow-feeling from a “misogynist” ( **Homebrew** ’s assessment, not mine), add me to the BTDT list! Kudos to you for not buying that **Rules** manipulative bullshit. (No! No! That’s not “intentionally derogatory to the biologically-normal functions of male bovines”. Mercy!) ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/35 "2003-03-06T23:13:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Malacandra \* > \*\*Heh… **EvaLuna** , if you’re prepared to accept a little fellow-feeling from a “misogynist” ( **Homebrew** ’s assessment, not mine), add me to the BTDT list! > > Kudos to you for not buying that **Rules** manipulative bullshit. > \*\* I’m confused; what is BDTD? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/36 "2003-03-06T23:18:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > \*\*I’m confused; what is BDTD? \*\* :scratches head: Buggered if I know. “BTDT” however means “Been There Done That” ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/37 "2003-03-06T23:41:55Z")
Sorry, it’s been a long day, and an even longer week. My brain is apparently fried to the point where I should really go home before I really screw up someone’s immigration case. ---
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2003, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/38 "2003-03-06T23:49:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > \*\*So’s my friend! Shall I e-mail you, or him, to see if he knows anyone? What are your criteria? \*\* Heck your always more than welcome to E-mail me… or AIM message me or ICq message me or whatever. ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f14d63/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2003, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/39 "2003-03-07T10:53:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > Don’t be a jerk, but remember that there are ways to let a woman know you find her attractive without twisting her boobs like faucet knobs. I spy a sig in this. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MissBungle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@MissBungle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissBungle)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2003, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183/40 "2003-03-07T13:05:05Z")
An odd way to think abot all of this but… apparently these men were ready to “get serious” date/and even marry. Just be grateful that they didn’t turn to you just because you were there and available. Ya know? You want to be someone’s love. Not someone’s convenience. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-my-role-is-to-help-men-find-happiness/147183.md?page=3)