# Apparently, preparing avocados is terribly dangerous. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 10, 2017, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297 "2017-05-10T16:34:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/41 "2017-05-11T01:18:27Z")
**JcWoman** , thank you! I was about to say that there is no possible way to slice a bagel without putting your fingers, at least temporarily, in the forward half-plane of the blade, but you have indeed come up with such a method. I know how I’m going to be cutting my bagels from now on. (in case it’s not clear, the above is not sarcasm) ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/42 "2017-05-11T01:27:23Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > **JcWoman** , thank you! I was about to say that there is no possible way to slice a bagel without putting your fingers, at least temporarily, in the forward half-plane of the blade, but you have indeed come up with such a method. I know how I’m going to be cutting my bagels from now on. > > (in case it’s not clear, the above is not sarcasm) That actually is the recommended way to do it, at least at the coffee shop I worked at years ago, and from what [the internet seems to recommend](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBVzQu7Vw5E). (To be honest, though, 90% of us didn’t bother to do it the safe way.) ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/43 "2017-05-11T01:38:58Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > The following is an actual exchange overheard a few years ago at our local food co-op. > > **Co-op worker, trying to make an amusing joke** : Hey, what’s up with the bagels? We noticed the holes are getting larger. > **Bagel delivery guy** : They hired a baker with a bigger dick. No way that’s _kosher_! ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/44 "2017-05-11T03:09:15Z")
Makes sense to me. I’ve seen a lot of vegetables and fruit where you’re specifically told to cut towards yourself. Always freaked me out, but I was told that it gives you more control or something. I instead always put them down. I’m not talking about avocados or bagels, though. I’ve always gotten pre-sliced bagels and have never gotten a whole avocado, just guacamole. ---
**Author:** ![Plumpudding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Plumpudding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plumpudding)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/45 "2017-05-11T03:19:22Z")
Maybe it’s just me, but op hinges entirely on how sharp my butter knife is. Very sharp. Sad. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/46 "2017-05-11T04:58:49Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > I don’t think that was made as a serious suggestion that people actually do it that way… Are you expressing disbelief at cutting bagels with one’s thumb in the hole? Cuz I tried to do that a few posts ago and some rando thought I was some kind of idiot. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/47 "2017-05-11T12:43:17Z")
The very first result in a Google-Image search for “avocado hand” is a guy who apparently tried to extract the pit from half of an avocado by _stabbing_ it with the point of the knife, _while holding said half-avocado in his other hand._ Never mind the risk of simply missing the pit - he hit it just fine, but he used so much force that the knife went completely through the pit and also through his hand. The pic was from the ER, with the knife still embedded in his palm (and the avocado). :smack: And then of course there are people who slice the avocado in half while holding it in their hand. :smack::smack: It’s not hard to be safe about this: 1. brace avocado on cutting board with one hand, confining fingers entirely to one side of the cut plane. 2. cut in half with knife in other hand. 3. twist halves apart. 4. if you’re truly safety-conscious, put the half with the pit on the cutting board, and swing the knife machete-style to embed it in the pit, then twist the pit out. 5. if you need a little risk in your life, feel free to hold the pit-bearing half in one hand while you embed the knife in it. a gentle/controlled swing, mind you, not like you’re trying to fell a tree in a single chop. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/48 "2017-05-11T14:06:03Z")
5a. Aim to hit the pit with the blade about an inch from the handle. You have more control for accuracy and significantly less energy to damage something if you still manage to miss. ---
**Author:** ![DummyGladHands](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DummyGladHands](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DummyGladHands)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/49 "2017-05-11T14:10:15Z")
And then there’s shucking oysters at home… ---
**Author:** ![constanze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@constanze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/constanze)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/50 "2017-05-11T14:34:05Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > Similarly, I remember reading articles about the large number of injuries that occurred when people were slicing bagels in half. These injuries might, in part, be caused by holding the bagel with your thumb through the hole as you slice it, even though the danger seems obvious. Whyever would anybody do that? We don’t have bagels here, but we have Brezen [Brezel – Wikipedia](https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brezel#/media/File:Muenchner_Brezn.jpg), which also have holes, and are often cut in half to spread butter on them [selbst gemachte Butterbrezel - aufgeschnitten und mit Butt… | Flickr](https://www.flickr.com/photos/eagle1effi/8446332871) (though the quickest way is to buy a ready-made “buttered Bretze” at your local bakery). For tourists, and People who like to clutter their kitchen, Shops sell Little wooden boards [http://www.waitzhofer-holzverarbeitung.de/img/ft-2-gr.jpg](http://www.waitzhofer-holzverarbeitung.de/img/ft-2-gr.jpg) hollowed out in the middle and with a hinge in the back so you can put the Bretze inside, slice the knife through the slit without any danger at all to yourself. (It can be useful in specific contexts, like mass assembly for large amounts [Brezenschneider](http://blog.derhobbykoch.de/brezenschneider/), or People with dexterity Problems, but I guess the main allure is for tourists). ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/51 "2017-05-11T14:39:16Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > And I bet those injuries are mostly to guys, a result of testosterone impairment. Guys will make a mistake with a sharp little knife they would never make with a table saw. Academy award winning actress, [Meryl Streep](http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2184230/Meryl-Streep-appears-Hope-Spring-panel-Tommy-Lee-Jones-kitchen-knife-injury.html), injured her hand several years ago cutting a avocado. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/52 "2017-05-11T14:49:54Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > Academy award winning actress, [Meryl Streep](http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2184230/Meryl-Streep-appears-Hope-Spring-panel-Tommy-Lee-Jones-kitchen-knife-injury.html), injured her hand several years ago cutting a avocado. She got an award for that? ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/53 "2017-05-11T15:42:42Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > She got an award for that? The [Julia Child](http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/the-french-chef/n8667?snl=1) award, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/54 "2017-05-11T15:47:02Z")
And she injured that hand with elegance, and great style, as befitting a First Lady of the screen. The reviewers compared her scream technique to Fay Wray’s. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/55 "2017-05-11T16:08:16Z")
The good news is that the Texas law firm of Knotts, Kropotkin and DeLay\* is seeking out clients injured while slicing avocados. Many have collected awards exceeding $2,500.00 from the Mexican Avocado Cartel. \*This firm is not certified in all 50 states to handle cases involving dangerous fruits and vegetables. Advertisement is not proof of ability. Your case likely will be transferred to desperate attorneys just out of law school. We get paid whether or not you get paid. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/56 "2017-05-11T16:50:32Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > And she injured that hand with elegance, and great style, as befitting a First Lady of the screen. The reviewers compared her scream technique to Fay Wray’s. Leads me to wonder: Is there a NON-Academy Award winning actress named Meryl Streep? ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/57 "2017-05-11T16:56:28Z")
I use an [OXO avocado tool](https://www.amazon.com/OXO-Grips-Avocado-Slicer-Green/dp/B0088LR592?sa-no-redirect=1). I try to avoid niche kitchen products, but this thing seriously works. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/58 "2017-05-11T18:14:08Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > The reviewers compared her scream technique to Fay Wray’s. Speaking of Fay Wray, whatever happened to her? I wonder how many of these injuries aren’t due to sharp knives, but dull ones, which require more force and behave less predictable. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/59 "2017-05-11T18:38:51Z")
> [@Lightnin](#): > > I use an [OXO avocado tool](https://www.amazon.com/OXO-Grips-Avocado-Slicer-Green/dp/B0088LR592?sa-no-redirect=1). I try to avoid niche kitchen products, but this thing seriously works. In 20000 years when the aliens find the post-apocalyptic remains of our civilization that thing will spark “What the fuck was that for?” debating and conjecturing that will make the [Roman dodecahedron](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_dodecahedron) mystery look tiny. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2017, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297/60 "2017-05-11T18:46:48Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > In 20000 years when the aliens find the post-apocalyptic remains of our civilization that thing will spark “What the fuck was that for?” debating and conjecturing that will make the [Roman dodecahedron](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_dodecahedron) mystery look tiny. …And the discussion about the [Hutzler #571 banana slicer](https://www.amazon.com/Hutzler-571-Banana-Slicer/dp/B0047E0EII/ref=sr_1_2?s=kitchen&ie=UTF8&qid=1494528098&sr=1-2&keywords=banana+slicer) will completely overshadow both of those. [sub]Read the Q&A and reviews only if you are in a place where you can laugh safely.[/sub] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apparently-preparing-avocados-is-terribly-dangerous/786297.md?page=4)