# Apples **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 5, 2004, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205 "2004-09-05T12:31:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/1 "2004-09-05T12:31:26Z")
I noticed that the tree in the back yard has apples on it. I took a bit of one yesterday. Not very sweet, and rather on the soft/mushy side. (I prefer extremely crisp apples, when I eat them.) I’ve heard that they’re good for making pies, but I don’t know how to make an apple pie. What can I do with them? I’m an incredibly lazy person, and a procrastinator; so much more effort than ignoring them is right out. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/2 "2004-09-05T12:34:18Z")
“Them’s throwing apples!” ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/3 "2004-09-05T12:40:09Z")
Apple butter is delicious. \*\*Apple bread recipe A special treat, this apple bread recipe is perfect! Bread dough: 3 eggs 3 cups diced apples 1 cup vegetable oil 2 cups sugar 1 tablespoon vanilla 3 cups flour 1 teaspoon baking soda 1 teaspoon cinnamon 1 cup chopped walnuts Topping: 6 tablespoons sugar 3 tablespoons cinnamon (Mixed together) Grease and flour 2 loaf pans and preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mix oil, sugar, eggs, and vanilla well. Then add all remiaining ingredients and blend well. Pour the batter into the loaf pans, then sprinke the topping on (before baking!!!). Place the loaf pans in the oven and bake for 60 to 70 minutes. \*\* Apple butter is good, too. \*\*16 apples 4 cups granulated sugar 2 teaspoons cinnamon, ground 1/4 teaspoon cloves, ground copper pennies, washed and sanitized. enough to cover the bottom the pot 8 jars 40 minutes 30 mins prep 1. Preparing the apples/pulp: Wash the apples and remove the stem and the blossom ends. DO NOT PEEL nor CORE. Cut the apples into small chunks. 2. Add 2 cups of water and simmer until the apples are nice and soft. 3. Once this is done, press the apples thru a seive or a food mill. YOU MUST HAVE at least 2 quarts of apple pulp. 4. Next, in a large pot, place the pennies on the bottom. It must cover the bottom completely. NOTE: COPPER PENNIES help keep the butter from sticking and burning!! Very important!! 5. Add the apple pulp, sugar and spices. Cook slowly until it is thick and will stick to a wooden spoon without dripping. Stir butter frequently to keep from sticking. If it is too thick for you, add apple juice to mellow out the thickness. 6. You may can the rest of what you do not use. Wash, sterilze the jars and lids. 7. Laddle the rest of the butter into the pint sized jars, leaving 1/4 inch headroom from the neck of the jar to the rim of the jar is called “headspace” Loosely tighten the jar lids to the jar. 8. Make sure you take a clean cheesecloth and clean the rim. You do not want food particles on the rim. Once this is done, place in a hot boiling water bath. 9. Make sure there is at least 1 inch of water over the top of the lids Boil for 10 minutes. 10. Remove from canner and set on counter. Let cool. 11. When they have properly sealed, the lids will make a popping sound. Store on shelf or in your fruit/canning cellar. 12. You will notice how nice and shiney your pennies will be too. The acid in the apple butter will clean the pennies. Dont worry, your apple butter is safe. Just remember to clean, wash, and sanitize your pennies before using them. A small solution of dish soap. Rinse with clear water. Place them in a small solution of bleach water. Rinse again \*\* ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/4 "2004-09-05T12:47:41Z")
My mom, who was not one to exert hereself in the kitchen, used to make applesauce with apples from our tree. No recipe, but I’m guessing it’s easy. ---
**Author:** ![foxymoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d26b3c/32.png) [@foxymoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foxymoron)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/5 "2004-09-05T13:02:36Z")
Explode them? Play appleball? Target practice? ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/6 "2004-09-05T13:08:07Z")
Apple crisp. Yummy. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/7 "2004-09-05T13:22:40Z")
You could put two of them in your trousers and pretend… ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/8 "2004-09-05T18:30:10Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > I noticed that the tree in the back yard has apples on it. I took a bit of one yesterday. Not very sweet, and rather on the soft/mushy side. (I prefer extremely crisp apples, when I eat them.) I’ve heard that they’re good for making pies, but I don’t know how to make an apple pie. > > What can I do with them? I’m an incredibly lazy person, and a procrastinator; so much more effort than ignoring them is right out. If they are sodt and mushy then they are not good for pie making, cause they will get even softer and mushier when baked and the pie will fall apart and have a weird texture. The best apples for pies are Grany Smiths, IMO. But any apple that has a good amount of firmness can work, and tartness is good as well because sometimes a sweet apple can become too sweet in a pie. ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/9 "2004-09-05T20:45:46Z")
How about [applesauce](http://www.recipe-ideas.co.uk/recipes-3/Applesauce.htm)? ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/10 "2004-09-05T23:14:59Z")
Maybe they’re good for apple juice or apple cider? ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2004, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/11 "2004-09-06T01:44:31Z")
The lazy person’s way (i.e. my way) of cooking up apple butter is to put the ingredients in a casserole dish and put it into a 300°F oven and let it bake. It’s slower than cooking on top of the stove but you run no risk of scorching in the oven. All you have to do is give it a stir 3 or 4 times every hour to prevent skin formation. And if you forget to do that you can just skim off the skin. When the butter’s as thick as you want it proceed with canning. Or you could just keep it in the refrigerator. Or freezer. Whichever is easier. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2004, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/12 "2004-09-06T01:49:57Z")
Hm. Apple butter would help to use up that sugar I rarely use. I don’t know about the pennies, though. Can I just use a teflon pot? ---
**Author:** ![t-keela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a3d4f5/32.png) [@t-keela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-keela)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2004, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/apples/263205/13 "2004-09-06T12:16:01Z")
**Johnny** You take them apples to the little old lady down the road and tell her that you don’t know what to do with them and that you would like HER to have them. Maybe you’ll get a really good homemade **PIE** outta the deal. **Johnny’s apple thread** :rolleyes: not funny huh?