# Are adult women having sex with teenagers equivalent to adult men having sex with teenagers?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267>\
**Category:** Great Debates\
**Created:** [February 10, 2019, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267 "2019-02-10T03:50:31Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 9

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**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\
**Post date:** [February 15, 2019, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267/161 "2019-02-15T23:22:35Z")

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I agree, in the situation described, it sounds like the parents and people trying to “protect” this kid by taking the matter to court inflicted far more mental anguish on him in the process than the older-woman-lover who was trying to have sex with him.

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**Author:** ![Littleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ccd318/32.png) [@Littleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Littleman)\
**Post date:** [February 16, 2019, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267/162 "2019-02-16T00:17:26Z")

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> [@Velocity](#):
>
> I agree, in the situation described, it sounds like the parents and people trying to “protect” this kid by taking the matter to court inflicted far more mental anguish on him in the process than the older-woman-lover who was trying to have sex with him.

I suspect that’s exactly what happened.

Then again, one could argue that she could have spared him that experience by making the adult decision not to start an inappropriate relationship in the first place.

IMO though , the court experience would be way worse than just letting me have sex and letting the thing run it’s course with a watchful eye.

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**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\
**Post date:** [February 16, 2019, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267/163 "2019-02-16T00:25:15Z")

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> [@Littleman](#):
>
> Then again, one could argue that she could have spared him that experience by making the adult decision not to start an inappropriate relationship in the first place.

If only all the women in my failed relationships just stayed away to spare me the trauma I’d be so much happier! Right?

Which is to say I doubt anyone (or at least very few people) start a relationship with the possible, even likely, disaster at the end in mind.

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**Author:** ![Littleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ccd318/32.png) [@Littleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Littleman)\
**Post date:** [February 16, 2019, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-adult-women-having-sex-with-teenagers-equivalent-to-adult-men-having-sex-with-teenagers/829267/164 "2019-02-16T13:57:35Z")

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> [@Whack-a-Mole](#):
>
> If only all the women in my failed relationships just stayed away to spare me the trauma I’d be so much happier! Right?
> 
> Which is to say I doubt anyone (or at least very few people) start a relationship with the possible, even likely, disaster at the end in mind.

Well, I’d call the likely hood of a traumatic court experience a lot higher than your normal teen bf/gf experience.

Just playing devil’s advocate.

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