At last, I have found my true golf cart buddy.
I used to work with someone like the OPs cubemate, and I would honestly tell him how much of a hack I was. Our work party ended up being a golf tournament, and you can guess who I was paired up with.
To hear him tell it, that round went down in the history books as “the fluke”. Worthy of a write up in Golf Digest.
I beat him by two strokes. Believe it or not, it only slowed his bragging. He demanded a rematch for over a year, I never accepted. I felt it far better to let it fester.
And just think of the way they waste money. 14 bucks for only 65 shots, what a rip off. 120+ shots is simply better value per dollar.I can see you , much like me, know the true value of a dollar, and get your money’s worth.
It is strange that there seems to be an inverse golf relationship between being good and having fun. I suck, but I have a blast, hell most for holes I don’t have a good enough memory to remember how many shots I took.
Since there are so few golf threads let me give a couple stories about how bad me and my freinds are.
One time we were playing, on a really backloged course, with a two group wait on every hole. We sucked, but we wern’t keeping anybody up, because of the wait. The jerk behind up told us that we should let him play through , I told him tough shit. But it made my friend John so nervous that he swung complety under the ball popped it about 8 feet straight up in the air, and hit it with his follow though backward about 150 yards.
Also I can’t chip worth a crap, so within 70 yards of the hole I just putt it hard toward the green. I’m pretty good at it though.
I once had a golf pro tell me my swing looked like Conan the Barbarian taking a slap shot.
The only time I ever hit fairway with a drive, is when its the fairway for a different hole.
And finally, my favorite all time drive had some serious backspin cause I undercut it, but I really nailed it. It went about 150 yards out, and 150 yards up, but between the backspin and the and the wind it finally landed about 20 yards in front of me, and rolled 10 feet behind me.
But me and my friends still have more fun than anybody else on the course.
Am I the only one that does the “Snowman Dance” on the green when I get an 8? Hold the putter over your head, bow your legs out, and shift your weight back and forth.
I’ve been waiting to see it on PGA coverage, but those hacks never seem to shoot an 8.
Fine. We agree that pompous golfers are jerks. But there’s no basis for putting all golfers in that category. Lots of musicians I know are jerks, but that doesn’t make me say that they are “guaranteed jerks” for thinking that what they like to do “matters.”
Okay. All well and good. Several excellent posts which lead me to believe that the putz next to me is in the minority, and not all golfers are jerks.
But (and it is a big one)- there are still so many negative connotations about golf. 9iron, I do believe that you are probably the only person I have ever heard of admitting to second hand equipment (bear in mind I’m around a bunch of doctors all day). So people socialize with friends on the golf course. Tell me, how many blue collar workers do you meet out there? Add to that, the recent negative press from Augusta. So it allows women to play if they’re married to a member. OOOOHHH, how generous of them. Makes me all warm and tingly, it does.
Yes,yes, Tiger and Vijay. Tell me: would they have been allowed to become members there if they weren’t already pros? Yes, golf is for everyone…just look at that inner city kid, heading off to the course with his clubs on his back! Who says it’s a rich man’s sport. No, basketball is NOT. The pros are rich. The kids who play street ball spent $20 tops for a ball. They don’t get told what is acceptable dress to put a ball through a hoop.
Acres and acres of land. All for the purpose of a few people walking around on it a day. (spare me any comebacks about the masters; that is a yearly event, not a daily one.) STAY OFF THE GRASS!! There are people hitting little balls and chasing them here!! What housing shortage?
George Carlin has a great bit he does called “Golf Courses for the Homeless.” I find I quite agree.
I have enjoyed all the posts, though…
Me too. But lots of people who would never think of stereotyping other groups of people have no problem with stereotyping groups like golfers, it seems.
No shit, nineiron. I am always amazed by those who think they have some sort of moral problem against golf.
As for the blue-collar players, Mr. sdle may wear dress clothes to work, but now that baby sidle’s here, we’re poor as church mice.
Luckily, my Dad, who has been an avid golfer for years, made up a set of clubs for hubby. We live next to the “muni”, and he and his buddies can go play after 4 pm for $8. They see plenty of high school kids, plumbers, gas station attendants and what have you, and all races, playing there.
I dare say that what you wear on a public course matters not nearly as much as having the latest sneakers on any basketball court, so that argument doesn’t make sense to me.
If you’re talking about the private clubs, well, they pay handsomely for that dress code, and as free financial and recreational agents, darn well have the right to do so.
Now-a cute story about golf and bragging:
When Dad was teaching hubby to play, he took him to the driving
range at a local course.
Roddy told me that others on the range, guys in carts, even
cars passing were slowing or stopping to watch Dad drive.
He said Dad didn’t even notice. He’s not out to impress anyone-his opponent is himself, and I think most people who love the game, regardless of ability, understand that distinction (something OP’s cow-orker might need to learn.)
Anyway, when Roddy told Dad that he’s so good that people stop and stare, he replied;
“Well, if you’ve been playing the same sport religiously for 40 years and no one ever admires your technique, maybe it’s time for a new hobby.”
As with many other things, those who have reached any level of accomplishment soon learn that what they haven’t learned yet or don’t know could fill volumes. The old " the more you know, the more you realize how much you don’t know" kind of deal. Tends to keep the alligator mouth from getting the chickadee ass in trouble. But there are loudmouth assholes in every walk of life, and golf is certainly no exception.
Pretty much all of my buddies and myself are blue collar types, and we’ve been playing golf together at most of the courses around the area for more than twenty years, mostly with other blue collar types. I’ve never witnessed a single racist or sexist act on a course or in a clubhouse in all that time. Most folks know they’re not headed for the ranks of the PGA, so we’re just out having fun, socializing, getting a little exercise and fresh air and pitting our meager skills against each other and the course for a couple bucks.
Pompous, arrogant, jerks? No, I don’t think so, but if we are, golf didn’t make us that way. We were probably already a P.A.J. before we ever picked up a club.
Thanks nineiron for saying everything I wanted to. I was sitting here getting all pissy about Maureen’s comments and you came along and calmly and clearly pointed out everything I wanted to say. Good for you (and me 
)
Gee, didn’t realize Central Park was privately owned… better tell that to the people of the city, who pay to have it maintained.
You have yet to change my mind.
I commute through the inner city every day. Stereotyping, you say? Sorry, rich white boy, I don’t see any Nike’s or Iversons on those kids. Their parents are trying to buy groceries with that money. My point was that the sport does not require they wear any specific clothing to be deemed “acceptable.”
I think it’s country club members who tend to be the arrogant pricks. Not like us public course denizens. We’re the salt of the earth, we are, always ready with a spare beer or helpful advice (“Man, that shot really sucked”) for a friend.
I’ve played for almost 20 years, have had the same set of clubs for about 15 years (my woods are actually made out of wood :eek: ) and am still pretty much a laid-back hack. One of my most memorable shots was when the club cracked in mid-stroke and the head flew about 5 yards farther than the ball. If you’re stressing about it and taking it too seriously, then you’re probably not having much fun, which defeats the whole purpose of a hobby.
Go out on the course, and look for how people react when they hit a bad shot: They’ll either:
(a) Bang the ground with their club and start swearing; or,
(b) say something like “wow, usually I slice it 100 yards to the right, not the left” and the take a swig from their beer.
You figure out which ones are the ones who tell strangers how great their game is.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Maureen *
**Gee, didn’t realize Central Park was privately owned… better tell that to the people of the city, who pay to have it maintained. **
I never said that it was privately owned. I said that it’s a whole bunch of land that’s being used recreationally, which some people seem to have a problem with, what with the housing shortage and all. Seems that if there’s any place that has a housing shortage, it’s a city. As publicly-supported land, it woulds seem that this is prime land for housing. Privately-owned land, of course, remains at the discretion of the owner.
**
You have yet to change my mind. **
And you have yet to make a valid point.
**I commute through the inner city every day.
Stereotyping, you say? Sorry, rich white boy, I don’t see any Nike’s or Iversons on those kids. **
Who’s stereotyping? You yourself have just assumed that I am a.) rich b.) white and c.) a boy. All this from a screen name which happens to be the name of a golf club? And trust me, if you think I’m rich, you’re WAY off.
**Their parents are trying to buy groceries with that money. **
OK, so no inner-city child has name-brand basketball shoes or clothes? You can’t be serious. Sure, they’re all playing barefoot. Of course their parents buy groceries, but for you to seriously think that inner-city kids do not buy (and are not the target of the advertisers of) Nike and Adidas, you’re wrong.
**My point was that the sport does not require they wear any specific clothing to be deemed “acceptable.” **
Where are you getting your impressions of golfers’ attire? From TV? From movies? I wear jeans if it’s cool, shorts (often cut-offs) if it’s warm, and a T-shirt or other normal shirt. People wear sneakers, shoes, whatever. At no golf course I have been to is there specific clothing that necessary for one to be deemed “acceptable” any more than you would find at a restaurant or a deli. OK, so you have to wear a shirt. How elitist.
I honestly don’t care if you think that “all golfers are jerks and snobs.” I’ve never met you, I never will meet you, and you hold a view that lots of people hold, as ridiculous as it is.
But please realize that it must follow that all bowlers are fat guys named Walt, all models are anorexic, all blondes are dumb, all football players are brainless, and all women tennis players are lesbians.
nineiron - I applaud your defense but I am of the opinion some people prefer to be ignorant. You might want to try to stop the tide with a teaspoon first. 
Wolfman & Rug Burn - My long lost golfing brothers!! We must have been separated at birth.
MeanJoe
And he did that bit what, about 20 years ago, before the Japanese Land Invasion? At the time, he said golf courses consumed “Two Rhode Islands and a Delaware” worth of land in the US. That’s 5,579 square miles, all for the pursuit of chasing a little ball around and getting angry while you do so, when it doesn’t obligingly drop into the hole.
Actually, you said : “I don’t see what trespassing on private land has to do with anything. If you think golf courses use to much land, fine. Get some friends together, buy the land, and use it for housing. Hmmm…isn’t Central Park…” ad nauseum. Which infers Central Park to be privately held. Nothing about “a bunch of land being used recreationally.”
As for my making a valid point: K. I started this thread asking for information on a certain subject: Obnoxious arrogant jerks who seem to gravitate to golf. Your overblown self righteous justifications point me toward believing that you fit that category quite nicely.
How many posters here are actually offended by what I said regarding agreeing with George Carlin’s assertions to golf? Aside from Nineiron, that is?
Good show Nineiron, ‘cuz if I didn’t know better, I’d think this thread was worthy of a pitin’, due to the stereotyping. I guess I would have to be considered a “golf snob” as I work at my game, almost religiously. I play 2-3 times a week and practice 1-2 times a week also. I’ve got custom made clubs but I guess I justify them in that it has knocked a couple of strokes off my game. I’ve played with people that couldn’t break 115 with a pencil with an eraser on it and enjoyed every minute of it. I’ve played with people who’ve shot scratch and thought it was a four hour trip to the dentist. And vice versa to the above. The OP must have been forced to watch Caddyshack to come up with some of these clothing/culture descriptions… YMMV.
I have never heard Mr. Carlin’s “assertions to golf,” but I think they might fit the definition of the word (dictionary.com)
- The act of asserting.
- Something declared or stated positively, often with no support or attempt at proof. (bolding mine)
The only person I see here with “overblown self righteous justifications” is you, Maureen. I, for one, am in complete agreement with nineiron.
Oh? which are those? That someone who gets offended by a George Carlin reference takes themselves far too seriously? Or that I was requesting information?
(sigh)
You requested information, and then shat all over the people giving you answers.
Aaaah, screw it. I’m taking my poor-white-trash-blue-collar-low-income-dead-end-job-holding ass out to the range. I need to work on my slice. Anybody else coming?