# Are funny women attractive? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 2, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027 "2006-08-02T15:35:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2006, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/41 "2006-08-02T23:00:21Z")
Men and women tend to have different senses of humor. A lot of women I know seem to play it too safely when it comes to humor. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2006, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/42 "2006-08-02T23:04:59Z")
The only possible reason I can think of for a guy not appreciating a good sense of humor on his female companion is if said companion is so funny that she’s constantly drawing attention to herself in social settings. If the gentlemen in question has low self-esteem or (relatedly) jealousy issues, I can see why he might have a problem with that. But as you’ve already said, you wouldn’t change for someone like that, nor should you. I am blessed to have married a woman who is not only gorgeous, smarter and wiser than me, but she’s also got a deadly wit about her that is hilarious, even when you’re the victim of it. Come to think of it, I’m wondering why she married _me_… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/43 "2006-08-02T23:07:36Z")
[QUOTE=QuickSilver] Funny AND beautiful is not only attractive but lethal. Unfortunately, I’ve recently fallen victim to just such a woman. Fucking smart too. Go on without me mates. I’m done for. Save yourselves. [/QUOTE] I’ll jump on her to save you. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/44 "2006-08-03T01:26:08Z")
Humor is my defense against the universe. If a woman is to steal my heart, funny is not merely a desirable attribute. It is the _sine quod non_. I can neither relate to nor communicate with people who do not have a healthy sense of humor. But give me the choice between the knockout and her plain but wisecracking girlfriend and you’ll find the knockout available for a date Friday night. Of course, “her” sense of humour should be compatible with mine. I have a taste for witty banter, wordplay, and a generous dose of absurdity. On the other hand, I’ve little appreciation for humor that is mean-spirited, or bitter. I thought Janeane Garafalo was smoking hot in _The Truth About Cats and Dogs_, but subsequent exposure to the corrosive cynicism of her humor killed the attraction. I likewise find humor based on pain, humiliation, obnoxiousness or stupidity to be utterly unappealing. An expressed fondness for Beavis & Butthead, Will Ferrell movies or Jackass marathons on her part would be a dealbreaker. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/45 "2006-08-03T11:48:07Z")
[QUOTE=Misnomer] … how smart can she be if she’s with you… [/QUOTE] :smack: Yes, we’ve had that discussion. She blames it on falling victim to the Stockholm syndrome. 😛 > [@Zebra](#): > > I’ll jump on her to save you. LMAO! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/46 "2006-08-03T12:00:14Z")
Everybody has a sense of humor - sometimes the senses of humor of two people match, sometimes they don’t. I still have to meet one person who dislikes being with people whose sense of humor meshes with his. The only times someone can be “too funny” is if they work too hard at it (in which case they’re not funny anymore), if they use it to be the center of attention everywhere, or if you’ve just had surgery and still have the stitches. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/47 "2006-08-03T13:13:07Z")
[QUOTE=Gail] I guess my question is this: Is the average guy’s ego such that he wouldn’t want to be with someone funnier than he is? Of course I have a specific guy in mind, who seems to like me a lot, but things just aren’t moving along as quickly as I’d like. [/QUOTE] I can’t speak for the average guy, but I think the woman I love is funnier than I am. She cracks me up constantly – sometimes with just an expression. Her humour _is_ biting and sarcastic, and it slays me. She seems to think that I’m funnier than her, though. No idea where the objective truth lies. I think a sense of humour (and a quick wit, especially) is just about the most attractive thing going. Hell, I think Margaret Cho is smokin’ hot, no mattter what phase she’s in – from gym body to butterball – because she’s as funny as hell. And don’t get me started on Sarah Silverman. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/48 "2006-08-03T13:17:58Z")
The sense of humor of SOME women emits a vibe of masking a lack of self-esteeem. Moreso than funny men – but I get that vibe from some funny men, too. I require a sense of humor from a woman (as well as smarts and independence), but being outwardly funny doesn’t really make a woman more attractive to me. But, some comediennes tend to be kind of “desexed” to me. I’m not sure why. The girls on saturday night live, or big time comediennes (Ellen, Lily Tomlin, Rhett Butler, Wanda Sykes) are never really sexy to me. I think I’d have to anser ‘no’ to this one. Perhaps I think of “funny” as more of a male trait. This question has sort of stumped me. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/49 "2006-08-03T13:51:45Z")
If a woman _smells_ funny? Sorry, not particularly attractive. If a woman can make me laugh? _Big_ plus. If a woman _thinks_ she’s funny, but my sense of humor doesn’t mesh with hers? It’s a sign that we might possibly not be a good match. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/50 "2006-08-03T19:31:02Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] [chauvinist pig] I love a funny woman, but only certain kinds. I love a dry, pithy, sarcastic humor in a woman. Women who are funny with over-the-top, obnoxious or in-your-face humor turn me off. So do women who have to dominate a conversation or a room in order to get the laughs. Women who are witty and funny and gracious without appearing to try too hard give me such a hard-on that I get a little faint. [/chauvinist pig] [/QUOTE] This tends to be me (although my looks would send your hard-on packing) but my downfall is that I will joke when it’s not appropriate, like when there is the potential for a Serious Conversation. I have to really work on putting aside my fear of emotional intimacy and being prepared to really talk. While I work on it, I feel a lot of unspoken jokes bubbling up that I just have to repress! So that could be a turn-off. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/51 "2006-08-03T19:34:20Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] (although my looks would send your hard-on packing) [/QUOTE] My hard-on is bulletproof, honey. If I find your personality engaging, it almost doesn’t matter how you look. You could be the **Walking Viagra Antidote** [sup]TM[/sup] and I’d still hit it. 😃 All I truly require, physically, is that you be clean and well groomed, and wear clothes that are reasonably flattering to whatever body type you many have. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/52 "2006-08-03T19:41:07Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] You could be the **Walking Viagra Antidote** [sup]TM[/sup] and I’d still hit it. 😃 [/QUOTE] Let me know if things don’t work out with that hottie you’re dating. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2006, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/53 "2006-08-03T19:55:06Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] You could be the **Walking Viagra Antidote** [sup]TM[/sup] and I’d still hit it. 😃 [/QUOTE] Hmmm. How do I go about changing my user name? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/54 "2006-08-04T04:57:29Z")
> [@Gail](#): > > I guess my question is this: Is the average guy’s ego such that he wouldn’t want to be with someone funnier than he is? I think what’s more important is that each person appreciates the other’s sense of humor, like **DianaG** said. It’s such a life-extender that committing to serious relationships without its benefit seems almost self-destructive. > [@Beware of Doug](#): > > One particular funny that doesn’t turn me on at all: Wendy Liebman. She’s a stand-up comic with a breathy sing-song voice and glassy little Klonopin eyes _crazy as a bedbug_, who has this maddening habit of making little trailing pseudo-subliminal whispers out of every damn punchline _sorta like this_. 😃 I love that kind of humor. Just goes to show. And you really need to learn how to code. That said, don’t do Klonopin, kids. Do I have stories or do I have stories… > [@Rubystreak](#): > > As for me, I make him laugh too, but not as often; he’s got that class clown thing going on, where I was the kid sitting in the back of the class passing an ironic comment now and then. I’ve done both in my time (heck, I’ve done both in class) and I would love to have a “switch” relationship in this category–like yours, but where the roles change every once in a while. > [@Larry Mudd](#): > > Hell, I think Margaret Cho is smokin’ hot, no mattter what phase she’s in – from gym body to butterball Woah! I had no idea she had ditched the butterball body. Google confirms this, of course. (I still don’t think she’s all that visually attractive, but MMV and apparently often does.) ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/55 "2006-08-04T19:48:19Z")
This has been extremely enlightening for this smart, funny woman. I’m so glad I didn’t decide to try to hide either my humour or my brains to try to get a man (I was smart enough to figure out how bad an idea _that_ would have been). Besides, being smart and funny really isn’t a choice - either you are, or you aren’t, in my opinion. (My husband and I make each other laugh all the time, sometimes until we can’t catch our breath. You can’t buy that kind of luck.) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/56 "2006-08-04T19:59:26Z")
[QUOTE=fetus] Woah! I had no idea she had ditched the butterball body. Google confirms this, of course. [/QUOTE] Damn. Chubby Asian women can be quite appealing. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/57 "2006-08-04T20:01:52Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] This has been extremely enlightening for this smart, funny woman. I’m so glad I didn’t decide to try to hide either my humour or my brains to try to get a man (I was smart enough to figure out how bad an idea _that_ would have been). Besides, being smart and funny really isn’t a choice - either you are, or you aren’t, in my opinion. (My husband and I make each other laugh all the time, sometimes until we can’t catch our breath. You can’t buy that kind of luck.) [/QUOTE] Smart. Funny. Married. Dammit. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/58 "2006-08-04T20:33:25Z")
And a good distance from your location, I might add. (Though not as far as from mine.) ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/59 "2006-08-04T20:43:48Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] Smart. Funny. Married. Dammit. [/QUOTE] I’m a good cook, too. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2006, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027/60 "2006-08-04T20:45:17Z")
[QUOTE=Misnomer] Let me know if things don’t work out with that hottie you’re dating. 😉 [/QUOTE] Well then, I just might. Hell, I’m from the D.C. area and have been meaning to get back for a visit. And besides, you aren’t saltpeter. I seem to recall complimenting your eyes in the now-defunct picture thread. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-funny-women-attractive/367027.md?page=4)