# Are Hummers (and Hummer drivers) evil or stupid? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 19, 2005, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876 "2005-10-19T06:11:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/61 "2005-10-19T18:44:15Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > I think you speak far too kindly about this loathsome and insufferable vehicle. > Stranger I got one as a rental car once when it just came out. It had trouble getting up hills - in Skokie Illinois! I feel for anyone stuck with one for more than a day. As for the OP: Ahnold has several, so I believe the hypothesis is demonstrated. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/62 "2005-10-19T18:57:50Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > No, you want an aft missile launcher. Otherwise you’d have to drive through the debris. My missile launcher came with an optional cow-catcher. ---
**Author:** ![five\_to\_one](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c68b51/32.png) [@five\_to\_one](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/five_to_one)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/63 "2005-10-19T19:12:51Z")
[Here’s](http://www.blogsnotbombs.com/hummerhome.htm) an interesting site I just came across for those who appreciate the finer implications of a Hummer. ---
**Author:** ![five\_to\_one](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c68b51/32.png) [@five\_to\_one](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/five_to_one)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/64 "2005-10-19T19:24:01Z")
> [@micahjn](#): > > Are sweeping generalizations and false choices evil, or just stupid? If the observations have a fairly strong basis in fact, then they are neither. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/65 "2005-10-19T19:32:06Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > ``` > Kind of like the "Happy Jack" hummer commercial a few years back where the kid builds a wooden hummer, and wins the soapbox race by going off the course. Cheating in otherwords. > > ``` He’s not cheating. If you notice the flyer advertising the race, it says “First one to the bottom wins”. He’s taking the direct route. > [@elmwood](#): > > I really believe that a few own them just to spite liberals and environmentalists. I wouldn’t have thought it possible, but you’ve actually come up with a good reason to own a Hummer. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/66 "2005-10-19T20:25:37Z")
I find Hummer’s _Happy Jack_ commercial far less disturbing that their Pac Man-esque one that suggests Hummer drivers are invincible and should attempt to run down anything that screws with them. ---
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/67 "2005-10-19T20:37:19Z")
My #1 problem with Hummers, and with SUV’s in general - and I’m kind of surprised that nobody else here has mentioned it - is how **motherfucking dangerous** they are to other drivers. If you’re driving a sensible car - aka, anything other than another Hummer or Escalade - and you get broadsided by a hummer, you’re dead. End of story. You don’t have any reinforcement on your car for where that monstrosity’s bumper is going to go, which is right through your window. It’s infuriating and I don’t understand how it’s even remotely legal for these things to be on the road when they pose such a danger to other drivers. It’s the equivalent of walking down a crowded street with a pistol in your hand, yelling “Don’t bump into me, or this thing’s going to go off!” Driving a Hummer, or any equivalent oversized vehicle, is a sociopathic act in which the driver is basically delcaring that he does not give a **fuck** about the safety of anyone else on the road. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/68 "2005-10-19T20:44:39Z")
> [@VCO3](#): > > Driving a Hummer, or any equivalent oversized vehicle, is a sociopathic act in which the driver is basically delcaring that he does not give a **fuck** about the safety of anyone else on the road. Like I mentioned, we have a huge farming community here (along with oil). Should the farmers drive Hondas? I would imagine that here, locally we have a very high concentration of people that actually _need_ these big ass trucks. And I know plenty of people who _need_ that big ass truck to make a living and simply cannot afford another car on top of it.\* \*I’m not trying to be a bitch, just curious as to what you would suggest for a situation like my lil’ town. ---
**Author:** ![zenith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zenith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zenith)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/69 "2005-10-19T20:55:56Z")
Hummer owners are all stupid, but not all are evil. Actually, the H2 made good business sense in that there was a big population of doofuses with more home equity than sense just waiting for someone to come up with an ultimate GI JOE toy to squander that line of credit on. GM has made a ton of money slapping a cheesy body over Chevy Suburban internals and selling the whole mess for tens of thousands of non-rebated, non-incentived dollars above what it’s worth. I don’t understand the H3. People in the market for $30K–range vehicles are people far more sensitive to higher fuel prices than the H2 crowd. The price of gas was rapidly escalating several months prior to the rollout of the '06 vehicle line. GM should have pulled the plug on H3 back in April or May. They’re gonna be stuck with a huge number of them. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/70 "2005-10-19T20:58:55Z")
I say Hummer drivers have no taste (am I the only one who thinks Hummers are ugly?). Just like people who drive vehicles painted carrot-puke orange. And anyone who drives a vehicle bigger than they can handle on a normal driving day, whether that vehicle is a midsize car or a super-SUV, has more dollars than sense. (I make an exception for people who are getting used to a new car, but there can’t be _that_ many people out there who’ve bought a new car in the last few weeks, can there?) ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/71 "2005-10-19T21:01:49Z")
The H2 isn’t a Suburban, it’s a Tahoe under the skin. That said, even as a SUV proponent, I have to agree towards the ‘stupid’ side for anyone foolish enough to buy a H2 or H3. There are many, many, many better trucks. Most of which are also more stylish. Heck, even an Escalade is a more rational choice under style, comfort, performance, and mpg. ---
**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/72 "2005-10-19T21:03:44Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > Like I mentioned, we have a huge farming community here (along with oil). Should the farmers drive Hondas? I would imagine that here, locally we have a very high concentration of people that actually _need_ these big ass trucks. And I know plenty of people who _need_ that big ass truck to make a living and simply cannot afford another car on top of it.\* > > \*I’m not trying to be a bitch, just curious as to what you would suggest for a situation like my lil’ town. _Of course_ I’m not talking about the rare and obvious cases where such a vehicle choice is appropriate, though I’d imagine that most farmers would look down on the Hummer as a glossy, citified thing. I have no problem with people who live in rural, undeveloped areas using SUV’s and large trucks - _that’s what they’re made for_. It’s implicit in this discussion that we’re talking about people who drive these types of vehicles as sub/urban commuting vehicles. ---
**Author:** ![abbeytxs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@abbeytxs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abbeytxs)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/73 "2005-10-19T21:07:04Z")
I used to hate SUVs with a passion, but where I live they are the Suburban Soccer Mom car of choice. I have become numb to them. The lady who owns this one [http://www.flickr.com/photos/carpelgin/31538964](http://www.flickr.com/photos/carpelgin/31538964) lives in my neighborhood. There is also one that has a SpongeBob theme but I couldn’t find a picture of it. (It was bad enough googling Barbie Hummer) ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/74 "2005-10-19T21:19:36Z")
> [@Sam Stone](#): > > Or people who fly first class, thereby burning 66% more fuel for their trip than those in coach? You might want to check your math. Most commercial airliners on this planet burn fuel more in proportion to weight than seat size – though maybe Embraer does things a little different. Unless the first class flyers in question happen to be made of depleted uranium, and are paying coach fares… in which case I’d be in complete agreement. ---
**Author:** ![aamco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@aamco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aamco)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/75 "2005-10-19T21:44:36Z")
Not that I really believe that the OP’s post was non-rhetorical, but I seriously believe there is a correlation between stupidity and car size. Most people who buy large cars do so for the safety, and the people most concerned about accidents are the people who get into the most accidents. And the people who get into the most accidents are, for the most part, complete fucking morons. Mrs. I-Put-My-Makeup-On-While-Driving is certainly getting into an accident a year. Mr. I-Need-300-Horses-To-Weave-Through-Rush-Hour-Traffic probably understands what it means to be in a nasty, five-car wreck. Mr. Oblivious thinks, “when I run into a car running a red light, I want to make sure I outweigh him so I can avoid injury.” Meanwhile, Mr. Observant is buying non-tanklike vehicles because he’s thinking, “when I see a car running a red light out of the corner of my eye, I want a manouverable car so I can _swerve the fuck out of the way_.” And let’s face it, anyone who’s fooled by the fatalities-per-accident statistic that large SUV’s use to justify their safety ratings simply doesn’t understand the physical principle of inelastic collisions. As more and more people get big cars, their relative safety goes down because the relative weights of the vehicles approaches unity. You don’t see compact car owners spanning two compact parking spaces because they think it’s their fucking right to park wherever they want. Here’s a fucking headline for all you SUV retards: **they don’t stamp “compact” on the parking spaces for shits and giggles**. You were simply too goddamned stupid to think about where you were going to park your Hummer in a crowded parking lot in the middle of a major metropolitan area. Poor planning on your part should not constitute a problem on my part, but then again, if you had a shred of interpersonal intelligence, you might have considered that before plunking down $50,000 for your car. So, in a nutshell, yes, SUV owners are stupid. SUV’s don’t make people stupid, it’s that stupid people selectively buy SUV’s. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/76 "2005-10-19T22:11:00Z")
> [@abbeytxs](#): > > I used to hate SUVs with a passion, but where I live they are the Suburban Soccer Mom car of choice. I have become numb to them. > > The lady who owns this one [http://www.flickr.com/photos/carpelgin/31538964](http://www.flickr.com/photos/carpelgin/31538964) lives in my neighborhood. There is also one that has a SpongeBob theme but I couldn’t find a picture of it. (It was bad enough googling Barbie Hummer) Good Og, I couldn’t become numb to that if a cartoon character hit me over the head with a giant mallet while I was sucking down a novocaine milkshake! There’s one I see on my way to work once or twice a month–it appears to belong to some self-promoting wanna-be rapper whose name has and in the name of all that is good and holy will continue to escape me–which portrays this said individual and his crew (presumably) performing various atavistic social acts including a car-jacking, a murder (someone’s head graphically shown exploding from a gunshot), and a gang rape. I suppose it has the intended effect on me; I want to run the piece-of-shit right off the road and preferably into a deep ravine. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![abbeytxs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@abbeytxs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abbeytxs)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/77 "2005-10-19T22:46:48Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > Good Og, I couldn’t become numb to that if a cartoon character hit me over the head with a giant mallet while I was sucking down a novocaine milkshake! > > There’s one I see on my way to work once or twice a month–it appears to belong to some self-promoting wanna-be rapper whose name has and in the name of all that is good and holy will continue to escape me–which portrays this said individual and his crew (presumably) performing various atavistic social acts including a car-jacking, a murder (someone’s head graphically shown exploding from a gunshot), and a gang rape. I suppose it has the intended effect on me; I want to run the piece-of-shit right off the road and preferably into a deep ravine. > > Stranger You win. Somehow sitting in the car pool line behind Barbie and Spongebob just doesn’t seem so pathetic anymore. Thanks for the perspective. ---
**Author:** ![Bob\_Loblaw\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@Bob\_Loblaw\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Loblaw_1)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/78 "2005-10-19T22:52:12Z")
My Governor, the Terminator, invented the civilian Hummer vehicle. I think of him whenever I see one. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2005, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/79 "2005-10-19T23:46:46Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > And I know plenty of people who _need_ that big ass truck to make a living and simply cannot afford another car on top of it.\* > > \*I’m not trying to be a bitch, just curious as to what you would suggest for a situation like my lil’ town. The OP still applies. Someone who needs a “big-ass truck to make a living and simply cannot afford another car on top of it,” yet drops $50k+ on a GI-Joe wannabe Tonka toy Hummer that has a fraction of the pratical working value as an actual truck, pickup, van or jeep, is stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2005, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876/80 "2005-10-20T00:42:44Z")
> [@Bob Loblaw](#): > > My Governor, the Terminator, invented the civilian Hummer vehicle. I think of him whenever I see one. … and is that a positive or negative? :dubious: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-hummers-and-hummer-drivers-evil-or-stupid/326876.md?page=5)