# Are Parents Making a Deal Out of Their Daughters' First Periods These Days? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 21, 2014, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312 "2014-06-21T18:39:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/41 "2014-06-23T16:11:52Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > Like the first time he gives a girl a ‘pearl necklace’? 😃 yes so OT hypothetical question. A local Realtor guy’s business card has a picture of him fastening a pearl necklace onto a little girl (presumably his daughter as he’s a such fambly man). That is so weird & Ew! right? ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/42 "2014-06-23T16:19:04Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > A dirty towel? A mom was disgusted? Because her kid got her period? > > I don’t believe one word of that story. Her mom was Margaret White. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/43 "2014-06-23T16:28:15Z")
FairyChatMom: > [@](#): > > Are these the same parent who applaud when their toddlers poop in the toilet? That’s different - when you’re trying to toilet-train a toddler, you’re trying to make him or her WANT to make the transition from diapers to toilet, hence, applause makes sense. On top of that, for toddlers, immediate reward is important, they don’t have the maturity to realize that the rewards for toilet training are long-term. With a period, I’m pretty sure that no pre-teen girl WANTS to have her underwear stained. They’re not what you’d call mature, but they can certainly understand, through simple, direct conversation without emotional overtones, the benefits of using pads or tampons. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/44 "2014-06-23T16:32:08Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > It’s very difficult to me to believe that a mom would give a child a dirty towel rather than a pad or a tampon. And it’s also difficult to believe that a mother would be disgusted about a biological function that she knows is going to happen in her daughter. > > It’s not difficult to believe a parent could be a jerk about it. Dude. You’re arguing about parenting with ZPG Zealot. Just…don’t. Cut and run. ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/45 "2014-06-23T16:43:35Z")
I was in a public washroom when I realized that the event had occurred and thankfully my mom didn’t make a big deal out of it. She did, however, the next time my dad visited break open a bottle of wine (Baby Duck to be exact - red wine, wtf) that had been in the fridge for ages. I kept asking why she had it when she doesn’t drink. Turns out she’d been saving it for “that” occasion. I was absolutely goddamn mortified. ETA: My sweet, loving, caring mom didn’t mean at all to “embarass” me, I guess she just wanted to mark the occassion with my other parent somehow. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/46 "2014-06-23T16:47:38Z")
> [@carlotta](#): > > Well there wouldn’t have been an occasion for a tone if the mom hadn’t FISHED A MAXIPAD OUT OF THE GARBAGE LIKE ONLY A CRAZY PERSON WOULD DO. To be fair, that pad did not look, to my admittedly untrained and male eye, like it needed to be fished out of anything. I assumed it was sitting prettily on the very top of the pail. ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/47 "2014-06-23T17:08:40Z")
> [@Soylent\_Juicy](#): > > I was in a public washroom when I realized that the event had occurred and thankfully my mom didn’t make a big deal out of it. > > She did, however, the next time my dad visited break open a bottle of wine (Baby Duck to be exact - red wine, wtf) that had been in the fridge for ages. I kept asking why she had it when she doesn’t drink. Turns out she’d been saving it for “that” occasion. I was absolutely goddamn mortified. > > ETA: My sweet, loving, caring mom didn’t mean at all to “embarass” me, I guess she just wanted to mark the occassion with my other parent somehow. Did she share the wine with you? ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/48 "2014-06-23T17:10:19Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > To be fair, that pad did not look, to my admittedly untrained and male eye, like it needed to be fished out of anything. I assumed it was sitting prettily on the very top of the pail. And to my admittedly untrained and male eye, looked _way_ too big for her. Please tell me they make smaller pads/tampons for younger consumers. ---
**Author:** ![sciurophobic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@sciurophobic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciurophobic)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/49 "2014-06-23T17:22:56Z")
[The Cosby Show](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0547083/) did a whole episode about Clair wanting to celebrate Rudy’s first period. It was then that I decided the show had been on way too long. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/50 "2014-06-23T17:40:01Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > It’s very difficult to me to believe that a mom would give a child a dirty towel rather than a pad or a tampon. And it’s also difficult to believe that a mother would be disgusted about a biological function that she knows is going to happen in her daughter. > > It’s not difficult to believe a parent could be a jerk about it. At the beach, it’s possible she did not have a pad or tampon (or didn’t care to get one). Also, many women who have mental problems relating to their own their sexual organs become disgusted when their daughters begin to menustrate. I knew a girl whose mother slapped her when she announced she had started her menustral period and not because of folk custom. It was because she said the word menustral outloud which the mother considered a “dirty” word. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/51 "2014-06-23T18:00:11Z")
My first thought was to equate celebrating menstruation with a party for a boy’s first wet dream. I don’t think that’s entirely accurate, but really - what’s the celebration part for? I thought the whole point of sex-related discussions was to avoid making a big deal over hormone- and sex-related developments and/or questions. Doesn’t having a period party do just that? I guess it depends on the kid. I know I was somewhat excited to get my period…before it happened. Then when reality set in with all the cramps, bloating, crankiness, new messes, and ability to get pregnant, the whole thing seemed anticlimactic and way overrated. Had my mom thrown a party for me, I sure the heck wouldn’t have been there. I don’t think teenagers appreciate milestones like those. In my head I would’ve been celebrating dirty undies. Yay, me! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/52 "2014-06-23T22:21:12Z")
i seem to remember in an earlier thread one person (over) shared that she and her mother did “period art” to celebrate the moment. not something i would hang on the 'fridge. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2014, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/53 "2014-06-23T22:43:43Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > It’s very difficult to me to believe that a mom would give a child a dirty towel rather than a pad or a tampon. And it’s also difficult to believe that a mother would be disgusted about a biological function that she knows is going to happen in her daughter. > > It’s not difficult to believe a parent could be a jerk about it. Actually, I’m having no trouble at all with this one. Menstruation is one of those things that just bring out the crazy in parents. If one is narcissistic to begin with, or any one of a hundred other disorders, I can totally see them acting out in far worse ways upon the realization. I mean, haven’t you ever seen “Carrie” ffs? ---
**Author:** ![skdo23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@skdo23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/skdo23)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/54 "2014-06-24T18:55:35Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > But will they be able to top it with a boy’s first ejaculation video? Mom: “Honey, I just noticed that some of the pages of my Victoria’s Secret catalog are all stuck together. You send out email invitations to everyone in the family, I’ll find a caterer.” ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2014, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/55 "2014-06-24T19:29:02Z")
> [@rocking\_chair](#): > > i seem to remember in an earlier thread one person (over) shared that she and her mother did “period art” to celebrate the moment. > > not something i would hang on the 'fridge. I so badly want to make a crack about potato prints but I think it might be in bad taste. ---
**Author:** ![gracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@gracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gracer)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2014, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/56 "2014-06-24T20:46:11Z")
My grandmother sent me a card. I think I have some sort of PMDD. I silently ripped it to shreds. I’m on meds now and it’s all great, but sometimes my hormones go whacky and I can feel that old feeling creeping up on me. How it can be something to celebrate is beyond me. Yeah, ok, for some people it’s not like that. Whatever. For some it is. It’s like celebrating someone getting depressed for the first time. Or celebrating while somebody slowly drowns. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2014, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/57 "2014-06-25T03:00:13Z")
[This](http://www.upworthy.com/if-you-re-too-grossed-out-to-share-this-video-then-you-re-exactly-why-it-exists-lw2-5b?c=hpstream)must have started going around in response to the video in the OP. It showed up on my FB feed today, and I have to say, she TOLD me! LoL! ---
**Author:** ![Hector\_St\_Clare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@Hector\_St\_Clare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hector_St_Clare)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2014, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/58 "2014-06-25T05:40:22Z")
Grossssss. I cannot imagine that any teenager, of either sex, wants to be discussing sex stuff with their parents. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2014, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/59 "2014-06-25T12:39:22Z")
> [@Hector\_St\_Clare](#): > > Grossssss. > > I cannot imagine that any teenager, of either sex, wants to be discussing sex stuff with their parents. I’ve never understood this attitude. Who the heck else can they ask? Who the heck else would you WANT giving them answers?!? ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2014, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312/60 "2014-06-25T13:31:48Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > Did she share the wine with you? Yes. Me: “What is this for?” Mom: “My daughter is a woman now!” Me: _horrified dawning realization…_ Cue the “embarrassed teenager” drama fit. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-parents-making-a-deal-out-of-their-daughters-first-periods-these-days/691312.md?page=4)