# Are People Becoming More Secluded? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 27, 2018, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800 "2018-12-27T19:16:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tzigone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Tzigone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzigone)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/21 "2018-12-28T19:10:50Z")
> [@](#): > > One reason (of many) that malls are dying is that teens, for example, don’t go there to hang out anymore. Another reason is a lot of malls don’t want them there. Don’t buy enough, or the adult clientele don’t want them there. The nearest mall to me had a sign about how anyone under 18 needed to be accompanied by an adult. Plenty of retail places are teen-hostile. I can understand why, even if I don’t generally agree. What I don’t understand is why they are then baffled at the fall-off in business or that teens don’t start going there once they grow up. ---
**Author:** ![MortSahlFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@MortSahlFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MortSahlFan)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/22 "2018-12-28T19:26:53Z")
Now we can all be alone together. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/23 "2018-12-28T19:41:45Z")
> [@MortSahlFan](#): > > Now we can all be alone together. “No one ever goes there anymore because it’s too damn crowded.” ---
**Author:** ![MortSahlFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@MortSahlFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MortSahlFan)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/24 "2018-12-28T21:05:38Z")
Even though this internet age might be beneficial for me NOW, I’m thinking about others, especially those born into this who’ll know nothing else. On another note, let’s say everyone is much dumber in 5 years - even our message boards won’t be as interesting, and causing more and more to withdraw. As a kid, I remember just going outside, and I’d join whatever was going on, and it was like a domino effect. That ended when people got cars, and we stopped playing sports around then. In my 20s and early 30s, I spent my time backpacking as much as possible, socializing with the best cross-section I could get. Now at 36, for the last year or so, I don’t have that feeling anymore. I do everything from home, and don’t ever have the feeling of “hanging out”, but that’s also because of what others like or don’t like doing. Interests change, and priorities change, and it seems people don’t have as much time, so they spend that on resting. I kinda notice this every winter in Michigan, when people tend to hibernate more, which is odd, because for the last few days I’ve been going for walks (sometimes buzzed) just to observe, but so my body can operate better, and I’ve been ending the walks with a sprint to the house for that “high”. I’d be happy if I could get 8-hours of sleep, because then that day has a chance. Even though I have the time to watch a movie every day, many times I just can’t do it. I saw a great one today (The Sign of the Leo)… Music and humor via video/audio… I’d guess I go on the internet every single day, even when I temporarily canceled my cable; I’d go out in the front yard to get a short signal and download enough to come back and keep my occupied for a while. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/25 "2018-12-28T21:20:46Z")
> [@Swampwolf](#): > > It’s beginning to remind me of Asimov’s [_The Naked Sun_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Naked_Sun) Beginning to remind me of [_The Machine Stops._](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Machine_Stops) According to that Wikipedia page, _The Naked Sun_ is regarded as a derivative work. ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/26 "2018-12-28T21:37:28Z")
‘Those kids and their damn phones!’ I really don’t think technology isolates people as much as much as others have mentioned in this thread. I’ve very active on my phone and social media and yet I go out and maintain as much of a social life as I can. Whereas a good friend of mine I can not get out of his apartment once the weather drops below 40 F without divine intervention. It’s not the video games, weed, or phone, he’d be finding a reason to stay home regardless. He just utterly hates cold weather, why he doesn’t move from Chicago, I don’t know. I’m glad for my frequent digital interactions with people around the world. Working second shift sucks, but I’m glad for the SDMB, texting, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2018, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/27 "2018-12-28T22:50:27Z")
Contrarian: Actually people interact with each other a lot more than ‘back in the day’ - if you think of normality as not the 50’s (which a lot of people tend to fall into) but pre-industrial revolution. Most people at that time lived rurally - your general social interactions were just with the three, four, maybe ten or twelve at most, families who lived nearby. It’s city living and the presence of millions of people all around you that’s unnatural - and I say this as someone who LIKES the city - I don’t actually want to go and live out on a couple of acres in the middle of nowhere. But unless you’re a total extrovert diva, at some point you’re going to reach max-people and want to retrench somewhat. Everyone reaches that point at a different personal level that feels comfortable to them. “Never leave the house” is a bit extreme for my taste but you know back in the medieval period they had hermits and anchoresses and the like - clearly there have always been people who were totally up for the “no humans please” kind of lifestyle, but most of them were unable to express it because they didn’t have the resources to support themselves without going out to work with some fellow-humans. Now they do. I don’t think the end point of this is that nobody leaves the house ever, I think it’s that people each find the level of human interaction that they’re comfortable with - and for some people that’s actually very little ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2018, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/28 "2018-12-29T01:07:17Z")
> [@Tzigone](#): > > Another reason is a lot of malls don’t want them there. Don’t buy enough, or the adult clientele don’t want them there. The nearest mall to me had a sign about how anyone under 18 needed to be accompanied by an adult. Plenty of retail places are teen-hostile. I can understand why, even if I don’t generally agree. What I don’t understand is why they are then baffled at the fall-off in business or that teens don’t start going there once they grow up. The nearby mall has a list of rules that say, in essence, “You are welcome here as long as you’re wearing shirts and shoes, and leave the weapons elsewhere and don’t steal or commit vandalism.” A while back, multiple police officers were dispatched there because a big fight broke out and people were afraid of a shooting, but it turned out to be some GIRLS who were vying for the same guy, and got into a fistfight about it. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2018, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/29 "2018-12-30T00:42:49Z")
Aaaaaaand, in the meantime, this evening’s news led with a story about a “heavy police present” at said mall, with no further details. By the time the broadcast was over, the emergency vehicles had departed and the crime scene tape was gone. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2018, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/30 "2018-12-30T01:12:31Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > Aaaaaaand, in the meantime, this evening’s news led with a story about a “heavy police present” at said mall, with no further details. I’m picturing a very rotund officer wearing a big red bow on his hat. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2018, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/31 "2018-12-30T03:32:11Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > I’m picturing a very rotund officer wearing a big red bow on his hat. 😃 Oops, “presence.” ---
**Author:** ![Tapiotar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3be4f8/32.png) [@Tapiotar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapiotar)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2018, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/32 "2018-12-30T18:12:07Z")
Could explain declining birth rates. Malthus didn’t foresee internet isolation. (Japan: [Japan suffers biggest natural population decline ever | CNN](https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/23/health/japan-birthrate-record-low-intl/index.html) ) (US [U.S. Births Dip To 30-Year Low; Fertility Rate Sinks Further Below Replacement Level : The Two-Way : NPR](https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/05/17/611898421/u-s-births-falls-to-30-year-low-sending-fertility-rate-to-a-record-low) ) ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2018, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/33 "2018-12-30T20:37:50Z")
Older modes of socializing are being replaced with others. Technology has made socializing tremendously more efficient (for example, see how dozens of us are talking to one another in this thread in close to real time despite being geographically dispersed…unheard of 30 years ago). But the trade off to efficiency is a loss of corporeality; for the most part, we essentially are just a bunch of electrons to each other. There is only so much connection that can occur through a medium that doesn’t allow us to see facial expressions or hear voices. As a long time participant on this board, I “know” a lot of posters but I don’t _know_ know them. But, I admit, this probably has as much to do with my personality and low maintenance requirements for human interaction as much as it has to do with where we are with technology-based communities today. Which makes me wonder: if we didn’t have the internet, would introverts be less socially connected or more? There certainly would be more of a drive to get out of the house, go visit relatives, or meet some people in a bar or church or whatever. But on the other hand, there’s a certain amount of effort needed to sustain that kind of socializing, and if expending that effort doesn’t come naturally, some folks may rather deal with loneliness and boredom than wear themselves out chit chatting with a neighbor. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/34 "2018-12-31T05:04:24Z")
Update on the mall thing: As I suspected, it was some kids who got in a fight, and it wasn’t as big as it looked although the police broke it up very quickly. ---
**Author:** ![MortSahlFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@MortSahlFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MortSahlFan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/35 "2018-12-31T13:16:58Z")
> [@you\_with\_the\_face](#): > > Older modes of socializing are being replaced with others. Technology has made socializing tremendously more efficient (for example, see how dozens of us are talking to one another in this thread in close to real time despite being geographically dispersed…unheard of 30 years ago). But the trade off to efficiency is a loss of corporeality; for the most part, we essentially are just a bunch of electrons to each other. There is only so much connection that can occur through a medium that doesn’t allow us to see facial expressions or hear voices. As a long time participant on this board, I “know” a lot of posters but I don’t _know_ know them. But, I admit, this probably has as much to do with my personality and low maintenance requirements for human interaction as much as it has to do with where we are with technology-based communities today. > > Which makes me wonder: if we didn’t have the internet, would introverts be less socially connected or more? There certainly would be more of a drive to get out of the house, go visit relatives, or meet some people in a bar or church or whatever. But on the other hand, there’s a certain amount of effort needed to sustain that kind of socializing, and if expending that effort doesn’t come naturally, some folks may rather deal with loneliness and boredom than wear themselves out chit chatting with a neighbor. I think those people would just stay home and watch TV all day. ---
**Author:** ![Ftw213](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b5e925/32.png) [@Ftw213](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ftw213)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2018, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/36 "2018-12-31T17:21:08Z")
I think laws shaped behavior, when people first got cell phones you would call and talk and do it while driving, then there became a law that you couldn’t talk and drive. People were forced to not answer and just text, which I think is seriously more dangerous. So knowing that people weren’t going to answer people started texting asking can you talk? It became the norm. I also think in previous times people drank socially until the dui laws were severe and meeting up for a couple drinks became risky. In my experience this is when I saw the “social drinkers” take up opiates because it was less obvious than being drunk so less a risk of a dui ruining your life. It also wasn’t a social option. ---
**Author:** ![drivekiller](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@drivekiller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drivekiller)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2019, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/37 "2019-01-01T07:06:35Z")
> [@MortSahlFan](#): > > It seems so. People went from talking to each other (without calling), then phones, then e-mail and text. I hear it from other people. > > If you do notice this, if you would be so kind to name the country you are in, I’d appreciate it. I’m in the US, btw. I do computer tech support. I used to get phone calls from clients. I now get texts and emails. It’s really hard to troubleshoot a problem over text or email – do they expect me to just come by, or call, or log in and disrupt their activities? I’m never clear on this. And is the issue urgent? Apparently not, or they wouldn’t email. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2019, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/38 "2019-01-01T16:37:56Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > But, it can be argued that even video chat isn’t the same as being in the same room with another person, and I do think that it’s becoming easier to never leave the house. There are also the anecdotes of families sitting around a table together, everyone with their noses down in an electronic screen. So, from _that_ standpoint, there’s something going on. And in the past they all stared at a TV without talking to each other. Before that they listened to a radio and didn’t talk. Before that they read and didn’t talk. (It was very common in the past to say avid readers were antisocial and hurting themselves.) Le plus ca change, le plus c’est la meme chose. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2019, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800/39 "2019-01-01T17:26:21Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > Contrarian: Actually people interact with each other a lot more than ‘back in the day’ - if you think of normality as not the 50’s (which a lot of people tend to fall into) but pre-industrial revolution. Most people at that time lived rurally - your general social interactions were just with the three, four, maybe ten or twelve at most, families who lived nearby. Quantity is one way of looking at it but what about quality? Supposedly modern Americans have fewer close friends than they did in the past. These are people they can turn to and discuss deeply personal issues with and receive a meaningful response in return. There are plenty of great things about online communication. But I think we’re still trying to figure out how it fits into our lives. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-people-becoming-more-secluded/826800.md?page=1)