# Are waitresses rude to women? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 24, 2011, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496 "2011-09-24T21:47:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Learjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/94ad74/32.png) [@Learjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Learjeff)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496/61 "2013-10-23T19:30:04Z")
> [@LC\_Strawhouse](#): > > I noticed that when I have been to dinner with any of my female friends, they often got angry at the waitress at some point. Or complained to me that the waitress is annoying … or tried to make sure that I wasn’t tipping her too much. Theory A: the waitresses are hitting on you and your female friends resent it. Theory B: Your friends are being bitches. I prefer theory A. > [@Mississippienne](#): > > I assure you, ladies, I do not want to fuck your husband Oh darn, there goes theory A. ---
**Author:** ![Learjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/94ad74/32.png) [@Learjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Learjeff)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496/62 "2013-10-23T19:36:09Z")
I only remember one time where a waiter was downright rude to me. I’m 56 and eat out plenty. This was NOLA, a rather fancy restaurant in New Orleans. Up to the end, the service was excellent. But the waiter asked, “How was everything?” I said that one item was a bit off (in some regard that the kitchen should know about) but I enjoyed it regardless, and the rest was really excellent. The guy practically read me the riot act for now allowing him to do his job by not telling him at the first opportunity that something wasn’t perfect, so he could fix it. The reason he was a moron was that I WAS THE FRIGGING CUSTOMER. I did NOT want to send my meal back and wait for a correction. I enjoyed the meal as it was. I was providing a courtesy to point out that the kitchen had made a slight (IMHO) mistake, but which didn’t even come close to ruining my meal. He was doing his job poorly by chiding me for not being the kind of customer he wants. I don’t give a rat’s ass what he wants! I want good service and good food, and until that frosty lecture, I’d received it. I just smiled and reduced his tip. I was tempted to give him a little lecture, but I figured it was his problem, not mine. ---
**Author:** ![Tante\_Dillie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Tante\_Dillie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tante_Dillie)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496/63 "2013-10-23T19:40:24Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > I’m a woman who’s been dining out for decades, and while once in a great while I’ll encounter a crap waitress, it’s been my experience that people of either gender who frequently complain about chronic bad service _usually_ are bringing it on themselves. > > There is a perception out there that men tip better than women… but at any establishment where you become even a semi-regular the waitstaff will tend to remember how you, individually, tip. As I tip well for good service in addition to being polite and reasonable I usually get treated VERY well by waitstaff where I’m a regular. > > If your friends are \*frequently \*encountering problems with people in service positions they need to take a look in the mirror. Well said. My experience as a woman diner exactly. ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496/64 "2013-10-23T20:16:49Z")
I have a female friend who always has issues with waitresses. But, my friend is a bitch and treats them like dirt (her excuse is that she used to be a waitress so she can). For the record, she was NEVER a waitress. She was a hostess. HUGE difference, at least in every restaurant where I’ve ever worked. However, I know a lot of former waitresses and many of them seem to have this delusion that they can treat other waitresses like shit because, “they’ve been there”. What a bunch of crap. I’ve been a waitress. I never have bad service. I treat my waiters (of any sex) very well and they treat me very well. She treats them like they’re her minions and then acts surprised when they aren’t very nice to her. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-waitresses-rude-to-women/597496.md?page=3)