# Are we married? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 2, 2001, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135 "2001-05-02T21:02:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![sethdallob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@sethdallob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sethdallob)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/1 "2001-05-02T21:02:01Z")
I was watching “Cops” today, and the cop said,“here in Texas, if you present yourself as a couple, your married.” Something about common law marraige… Well, my g/f and I are definitely a couple, but we are not married…I thought. What is this common law marraige, and would it apply in my scenario? ---
**Author:** ![Ross](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e274bd/32.png) [@Ross](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ross)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/2 "2001-05-02T21:09:22Z")
Sorry, man. You weren’t until you posted. Now you’re one of us. Buy some carpet slippers and a cardigan, learn to smoke a pipe, and start decorating the nursery. It’s gonna be a long 50 years. The rest of you, RUN! Save yourselves! ---
**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/3 "2001-05-02T22:09:53Z")
One of the first threads I posted to was on this subject. As I understand it, you have to present yourself as a married couple, e.g. introduce yourself as Mr and Mrs. sethdallob, or better yet have some sort of legal document (like a mortgage or bank account) where you present yourself as married. What I don’t know is how legally binding this can be. If you introduce your GF as your wife to one person, then part amicably later I doubt you would need to get a divorce(otherwise, I think I’m guilty of bigamy). Lot’s of shady areas there. If you just go out on a date, and say “Yeah, we’re together” you aren’t married… [sub]yet[sub] ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/4 "2001-05-02T22:42:49Z")
Then you are NOT married. You don’t? Then you are! ---
**Author:** ![Chas.E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e99b99/32.png) [@Chas.E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chas.E)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/5 "2001-05-02T22:55:35Z")
My girlfriend of 2 1/2 years moved out of my house one day while I was at work, taking everything I owned, and moving in with her other boyfriend (which I knew nothing about). I called the LAPD to file a theft report, they refused to take the report, claiming that since I had lived with her for over 2 years, we were common-law married, and I’d have to sue her in civil court to get my stuff back. What a bunch of crap. Of course, this was the LAPD Hollywood Division, the most corrupt police organization on earth. They’d come up with any excuse to avoid doing their job. ---
**Author:** ![xicanorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a88e57/32.png) [@xicanorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xicanorex)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/6 "2001-05-02T23:34:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sethdallob \* > \*\*Well, my g/f and I are definitely a couple, but we are not married…I thought. What is this common law marraige, and would it apply in my scenario? \*\* I will have to agree with Zyada on this one. If you and your girlfriend have not declared yourselves as a married couple to others or represented yourselves as such, then you would not be considered as such. I can’t find access to common-law cases or studies, but let see what Texas’ Family Code has to say about this: [http://www.capitol.state.tx.us/statutes/fa/fa000200.html#fa029.2.401](http://www.capitol.state.tx.us/statutes/fa/fa000200.html#fa029.2.401) [quote] SUBCHAPTER E. MARRIAGE WITHOUT FORMALITIES § 2.401. Proof of Informal Marriage (a) In a judicial, administrative, or other proceeding, the marriage of a man and woman may be proved by evidence that. (1) a declaration of their marriage has been signed as provided by this subchapter; or (2) the man and woman agreed to be married and after the agreement they lived together in this state as husband and wife and there represented to others that they were married. (b) If a proceeding in which a marriage is to be proved as provided by Subsection (a)(2) is not commenced before the second anniversary of the date on which the parties separated and ceased living together, it is rebuttably presumed that the parties did not enter into an agreement to be married. © A person under 18 years of age may not: (1) be a party to an informal marriage; or (2) execute a declaration of informal marriage under… § 2.402. Declaration and Registration of Informal Marriage (a) A declaration of informal marriage must be signed on a form prescribed by the bureau of vital statistics and provided by the county clerk. Each party to the declaration shall provide the information required in the form. (b) The declaration form must contain: (1) a heading entitled “Declaration and Registration of Informal Marriage, \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ County, Texas”; (2) spaces for each party’s full name, including the woman’s maiden surname, address, date of birth, place of birth, including city, county, and state, and social security number, if any; (3) a space for indicating the type of document tendered by each party as proof of age and identity; (4) printed boxes for each party to check “true” or “false” in response to the following statement: “The other party is not related to me as: (A) an ancestor or descendant, by blood or adoption; (B) a brother or sister, of the whole or half blood or by adoption; © a parent’s brother or sister, of the whole or half blood or by adoption; or (D) a son or daughter of a brother or sister, of the whole or half blood or by adoption.”; (5) a printed declaration and oath reading: “I SOLEMNLY SWEAR (OR AFFIRM) THAT WE, THE UNDERSIGNED, ARE MARRIED TO EACH OTHER BY VIRTUE OF THE FOLLOWING FACTS: ON OR ABOUT (DATE) WE AGREED TO BE MARRIED, AND AFTER THAT DATE WE LIVED TOGETHER AS HUSBAND AND WIFE AND IN THIS STATE WE REPRESENTED TO OTHERS THAT WE WERE MARRIED. SINCE THE DATE OF MARRIAGE TO THE OTHER PARTY I HAVE NOT BEEN MARRIED TO ANY OTHER PERSON. THIS DECLARATION IS TRUE AND THE INFORMATION IN IT WHICH I HAVE GIVEN IS CORRECT.” … [quote] Also, accorging to the web site by a Raggio & Raggio, PLLC Law Firm, on a draft titled _A “M.A.P.” TO FAMILY LAW IN TEXAS_ by Kenneth G. Raggio, esq, he states: > [@](#): > > What does Texas do to help people in long-term relationships who have not ceremonially married? A: Common Law Marriage. Texas is one of 13 states (plus Washington D.C.) that recognizes common law or informal marriages. The elements necessary to establish an informal marriage in Texas, given in §2.401 of the Family Code, are (1) the man and woman agreed to be married, (2) after the agreement they lived together in this state as man and wife and (3) they represented to others that they were married. The suit must be filed within two years of the last cohabitation of the parties. > Proof of the required agreement to be married may be made by circumstantial evidence or conduct of the parties under Russell v. Russell, 865 SW2d 929 (Tex. 1993). That proof is subject to legal and factual sufficiency review on appeal to the court of appeals and to legal sufficiency review upon appeal to the Texas Supreme Court. And under Russell, a finding that there is legally and/or factually sufficient evidence of cohabitation and public representation will not necessarily constitute legally and/or factually sufficient evidence of an agreement to be married. > Endnote: Family Law cases comprise the majority of cases filed in Texas. There are other family law and divorce articles elsewhere in this issue mapping out other aspects of the “People’s Court.” So, in short do represent yourselves as such, do not sign any informal marriage documents with the county clerk, and you will have no problem. Hope that helps. XicanoreX ---
**Author:** ![xicanorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a88e57/32.png) [@xicanorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xicanorex)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/7 "2001-05-02T23:46:01Z")
Uh, at the end is should read “do **not** represent”. XicanoreX ---
**Author:** ![TV\_time](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f17d59/32.png) [@TV\_time](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TV_time)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2001, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/8 "2001-05-02T23:57:39Z")
Common law marriage (i.e. presenting yourselves as a married couple and thus actually being married) used to be quite common especially here in the West. It stemmed from the Old West when there were few ministers and judges within easy reach. So rather than live (and sometimes die) waiting for a judge or minister to show up, territorial and later state governments passed laws stating that people could claim to be married and in fact, be married by that process and were subject to those rights and responsibilities that entailed. Colorado’s law was on the books until the early 1970s, I believe. It was then a young woman sued a legislator for divorce claiming they were legally married because they had registered in a motel at three different times as husband and wife. The judge hearing the case threw it out claiming that there had to be an “intent” to be married and there was clearly no intent in this situation. However, within six months, that form of common law marriage was no longer in effect (at least in Colorado). I have been told a great many people breathed a sigh of relief. TV ---
**Author:** ![xicanorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a88e57/32.png) [@xicanorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xicanorex)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/9 "2001-05-03T00:31:10Z")
. . …by the way, if you have alot of time in your hands, I highly recommend the article titled “COMMON LAW MARRIAGES AND THE PUTATIVE SPOUSE” by Keith M. Nelson and Laurie S. Williams from MCCURLEY, KINSER, MCCURLEY & NELSON, L.L.P. which is about 40 pages worth on legal opinion on Texas common law and can be accessed at [http://aaml.org/common.htm](http://aaml.org/common.htm). As the introduction to the paper states “This article is designed to be an overview of Title 1, Subchapter E of the Texas Family Code entitled “Marriage Without Formalities,” as well as an overview of various statutes and case law relative to the topic of putative marriages. This article is intended to also provide, to a limited degree, helpful tips on presenting or defending suits involving non-ceremonial, cohabitating unions or putative marriage situations.” . . . .mmmmm . . . .sounds like great night reading material while your common-law wife is sound asleep. 😉 XicanoreX ---
**Author:** ![Gazoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ce73a5/32.png) [@Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazoo)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/10 "2001-05-03T01:25:58Z")
I haven’t done any research, but here’s my WAG on the subject… Some have mentioned “Common Law” marriages above. I doubt that such a thing even exists in the US anymore. Why? Common Law is, by definition, _not_ a legislative act. All the states I’ve looked at - Wisconsin, Indiana, and based on posts above, Texas - have passed laws which cover the former “common law” marriage, thus taking it from the ranks of common law. That being said, state law rules on this issue, and in this case I’d imagine they vary widely. The two most important factors seem to be (a) Your intent is to be treated as a married couple, and (b) You hold yourself out as a legally married couple. ---
**Author:** ![Butterfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Butterfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Butterfly)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/11 "2001-05-03T01:51:06Z")
My boyfriend and I have been living together for about 2 1/2 years. On all the leases, our names appeared together (though with separate last names). We also have a bank loan together (also with separate last names). We live in Oklahoma. However, as a student, I claim my permanent address to be in Colorado (at the 'rents house). Are WE married? ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/12 "2001-05-03T01:52:05Z")
Laws vary state by state. Others are correct, though. Generally, “holding oneself out as married” and “intent to act & be treated as married” are key elements. Time together has nothing to do with it. If you live together, comingle funds, file joint tax returns, share a last name, are “known” generally to be married, you probably are. I was never “married” but I did get a legal divorce, here in Colorado, for financial reasons. The law is indeed fuzzy on this issue. I never took his name & we did not file joint taxes. However, I did wear a ring, we jointly registered & insured cars, bank accounts, and credit cards. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/13 "2001-05-03T02:52:17Z")
Note, too, that common-law status now applies to same-sex couples in Canada. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/14 "2001-05-03T03:19:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > \*\*Note, too, that common-law status now applies to same-sex couples in Canada. 🙂 \*\* Woohoo. Good! There was a case about 6 years ago here, where a gay couple lived together, & X supported Y through med school. Since Colorado does not recognize gay marriage in any form, the court properly treated it as a breach of contract issue. X was awarded a fairly good settlement, since he had a reasonable expectation that after supporting Y through school, he would reap some benefit. Quite bloody right, too. In my case, that was my fall-back position, since I had supported shithead theough almost seven years of schooling. Yay for Canada. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Yuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/50afbb/32.png) [@Yuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yuck)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2001, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-we-married/64135/15 "2001-05-03T07:57:07Z")
Loved this thread. Thought you-all would like to know that a big part of the legal decisions in Texas concerning “common law” marriages has been related to criminal cases where an accused didn’t want the “SO” to testify. Mostly, they do (testify…)