# Are You a Person Who Complains (re Goods & Services)? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 14, 2006, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197 "2006-12-14T22:31:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![1010011010](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/ea666f/32.png) [@1010011010](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/1010011010)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/21 "2006-12-15T02:30:17Z")
I probably would have taken the vinegar back to the store for a replacement. I don’t know if “There’s a spider in my bottle of vinegar.” qualifies as complaining. If it was sufficiently cool looking (are pics forthcoming?) I might go buy another one just so I could keep the preserved spider. As for the salesman… I’d probably have ignored him up until the “Wow, you’re so manly! Most women are indecisive cunts!” comment. At that point I’d ask to see his manager, return the shoes, and explain why if asked. ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/22 "2006-12-15T02:33:28Z")
[QUOTE=Harmonious Discord] Like that helped the situation. [/QUOTE] Well, she did know I was joking. [QUOTE=Harmonious Discord] You made it sound like the other woman thought you should get free boots, because they only had black, and the clerk was tactless. [/QUOTE] Yes, I suppose I did. And while she did say, “Hey, you could get free boots!” when she was encouraging me to complain about the salesman when I told her the story (the fact that they didn’t have the camel in my size was never an issue with her, just bad luck), but I took it as more of a lighthearted way to encourage me to grow a pair and complain, because she knows I don’t tend to do it. I don’t think SHE really thought I was going to get free boots, either. As for the spider, I would have returned the vinegar to the store without a second thought if the little “enclosure” hadn’t been so interesting (like, if it were just a shard of plastic or something). But since I willingly (and somewhat enthusiastically) kept it for the quirk factor, I hardly feel justified in complaining to anyone about it. ---
**Author:** ![Archergal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Archergal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archergal)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/23 "2006-12-15T02:36:51Z")
[QUOTE=auntie em] As for the spider, I would have returned the vinegar to the store without a second thought if the little “enclosure” hadn’t been so interesting (like, if it were just a shard of plastic or something). But since I willingly (and somewhat enthusiastically) kept it for the quirk factor, I hardly feel justified in complaining to anyone about it. [/QUOTE] You know, I might have been tempted to take it back to the store just to show it to them. More of a “Hey, look what was in this bottle of vinegar! Isn’t that _weird???_” than a “This evil company let a SPIDER get into my vinegar! I want restitution!!!” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/24 "2006-12-15T02:38:57Z")
[QUOTE=1010011010] I probably would have taken the vinegar back to the store for a replacement. I don’t know if “There’s a spider in my bottle of vinegar.” qualifies as complaining. If it was sufficiently cool looking (are pics forthcoming?) I might go buy another one just so I could keep the preserved spider. [/QUOTE] That’s exactly what I did, though my friend thinks I should complain to the vinegar company. As for the pics, I’m not sure how they’d turn out, but I can give it a whirl. The spider is a lovely golden color (kind of like the boots I wanted), and pretty shriveled, but I found him rather interesting. [QUOTE=1010011010] As for the salesman… I’d probably have ignored him up until the “Wow, you’re so manly! Most women are indecisive cunts!” comment. At that point I’d ask to see his manager, return the shoes, and explain why if asked. [/QUOTE] I was having one of those moments where I was feeling like I should do something, but feeling too chicken to actually do it. I also felt like I needed time to think about it and make sure my feelings were rational (because I really felt like I might have been overreacting). ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/25 "2006-12-15T02:42:38Z")
[QUOTE=Archergal] You know, I might have been tempted to take it back to the store just to show it to them. More of a “Hey, look what was in this bottle of vinegar! Isn’t that _weird???_” than a “This evil company let a SPIDER get into my vinegar! I want restitution!!!” 😛 [/QUOTE] The thing that’s so interesting to me is HOW the little sucker got in there. I could see if he’d been living in the empty bottle before it got filled, but I’d have thought that the force of the liquid would have at least broken his little cobwebs and sent him sinking to the bottom, when actually he’s suspended a couple of inches above the bottom, held up by two stretches of cobweb. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/26 "2006-12-15T03:21:33Z")
Like everyone else said, it all depends. I’ve worked retail, and I know what hell it truly is. One thing I do try to do is be polite and friendly, even when I’m expressing a complaint. I always appreciated it when customers did so-“I know it’s not your fault, and I understand that mistakes happen. I just thought you would like to know that blah blah blah”. Honey and vinegar and all that. (Although apparently honey didn’t work for the spider!) ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/27 "2006-12-15T03:51:16Z")
No need to respond to this auntie em. I want you to know that I’ve been taking this whole thread in a lite humurous way, so don’t take what I said in a mean way. I haven’t taken your replies that way. ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/28 "2006-12-15T03:56:58Z")
I will complain if I think it will be effective. I will compliment if I am pleased. I rarely shop when I don’t have time to complain or compliment and I try to find the most interested person to complain/compliment to. In restaurants, I have been told by owners that they need specifics so they can make corrections. In service industries, if I do not get good service, I do not return. I return faulty goods. I do not endure salespeople who don’t know their jobs, don’t care to sell me what I might want or annoy me. I seldom want anything I can’t get somewhere else. I once asked a car sales man to stop talking. His voice was giving me hives. I thank waitstaff. I thank sales staff. I tell the chef how much I enjoy what he made for me. I tip well. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/29 "2006-12-15T05:48:28Z")
[QUOTE=auntie em] Where can I get one of these sticks? [/QUOTE] It’s just a five foot flagpole. I’ve put a rubber foot on it, similar to the ones used on furniture, and I’ve attached a small leather pouch and braided leather thong to the loop where a flag would go. I use it because I have joint trouble, and it helps me keep my balance while I’m walking. If my hip freezes up while I’m sitting, sometimes I need that stick to stand up, as otherwise I’d collapse. I got it at an arts and crafts store. However, you have to carry it like you MEAN it. Needless to say, I keep it handy when I feel like doing a bit of moderating. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/30 "2006-12-15T05:55:37Z")
I have worked customer service and I will rarely complain about anything because I know accidents happen. If I complain about something it is because it is a huge deal to me. I can handle bugs in the food, ingredients I should have checked for buy didn’t (I can’t have caffiene so that is my own damn fault if I don’t read the label), etc. Generally if I say anything at all it is simply a heads up to prevent a company from getting complaints from other people. The spider in the vinegar thing though, they need to know about that. Don’t send it back or anything, just call the vinegar company and tell them about it. They will want some information from the packaging and stuff, but tell them that though you think it is awesome you know other people may not. You can even refuse and coupons or products they would send you if you want, but definately tell them about it. Wouldn’t you want to know if you made a product that got sent out with spiders in it? ---
**Author:** ![tashabot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tashabot/32/6250_2.png) [@tashabot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tashabot)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/31 "2006-12-15T06:51:15Z")
[QUOTE=auntie em] Excellent point, and that’s also something I don’t do. Actually, I do it here at work sometimes, you know, shoot someone’s manager an email of praise if they’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty to help me out (although when people do that for me, and copy me on the email to my manager, it makes me feel a little weird . . . ), but not in terms of Customer Service. I think I’m going to try to change that. Thanks, **tashabot**! 🙂 [/QUOTE] If I can get one person every year to think about that sort of thing, my $15 a year is well-spent. 😃 People who actually make the effort in service jobs (as I always did) totally deserve praise. They could easily get by without making the extra effort but they do it anyway, for YOUR convenience, and very little compensation. Even a smile and a “Thanks!” makes it worth it, but a commendation to those above is even better. ~Tasha ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/32 "2006-12-15T10:13:30Z")
Depends. I was thinking about it recently and I think that in my case the biggest reason to complain or not is whether I can indicate a possible solution other than “you morons should all be fired and this damn hotel burnt down to the floor!” Having spent the last 10 or so years in Quality Control, when an establishment hands me one of those customer sattisfaction polls I fill it in, with the good and the bad. I also make a point of stating my compliments when I get superb service (in person and, if possible, by mail to whomever’s superiors). And there’s been several times when I’ve gone to someone and pointed out, for example, that “I’ve been in this hotel for 8 days now; I’m staying for 30 days. I’ve ordered the same dinner three times and each time I got a different thing. Do you think you could get your cooks to decide how much tuna and which kind should a tuna salad have? The first version had a slice of real tuna, the second had the contents of a small can and today’s version doesn’t have any. And please get room service to either bring a bottle of soda, a can of soda or a glass of soda but not play russian roulette about which one we get each time, ok? Thank you!” (yeah, that time my smile was not particularlu po-lite) ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/33 "2006-12-15T10:30:39Z")
I only complain when things are really bad, most of the time I just let it go. It’s not because I’m spineless, it’s just because sometimes it’s not such a big deal and it’s more hassle to complain than just to leave it. My thinking is that it’s my choice where I shop, and if I get bad or discourteous service somewhere, I just won’t go back. As far as restaurants are concerned, I’ve rarely had cause to complain but when I have done, it’s been for a very good reason (uncooked or undercooked meals, stuff served cold etc) and I’ve tried to be polite about it - it’s probably not somebody’s _fault_, it’s just an oversight. At the same time, if service somewhere is really good then I’ll be generous with the compliments and anything said to waitstaff or managers will be followed up in writing to the restaurant 'cos I do appreciate good service. ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/34 "2006-12-15T14:02:53Z")
[QUOTE=Harmonious Discord] No need to respond to this auntie em. I want you to know that I’ve been taking this whole thread in a lite humurous way, so don’t take what I said in a mean way. I haven’t taken your replies that way. [/QUOTE] Oh, no offense taken at all. And if I’d intended to offend YOU, I would have included at least one comparison of you to an annoying shoe salesman. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/35 "2006-12-15T14:13:20Z")
[QUOTE=pbbth] The spider in the vinegar thing though, they need to know about that. Don’t send it back or anything, just call the vinegar company and tell them about it. They will want some information from the packaging and stuff, but tell them that though you think it is awesome you know other people may not. You can even refuse and coupons or products they would send you if you want, but definately tell them about it. Wouldn’t you want to know if you made a product that got sent out with spiders in it? [/QUOTE] That’s a good point and, I think, part of the reason my friend took matters into her own hands with the spider incident. (In fact, she has the bottle at her desk as we speak, because she’s pretty well-versed in this complaint business and knew about the kind of info the company would want.) I myself wasn’t sure how to toe the line between “How Dare You Put A Spider in My Vinegar!” and “Dude - COOOOL!” so I chose to abstain. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/36 "2006-12-15T14:20:32Z")
Depends on how strongly I feel. I can think of two times in the past year where I complained. I probably average 1 or twice a year. The spider thing: I would be way too lazy to complain about it and would probably just buy another bottle. The shoe guy: I might write a note to his manager, depending on my mood. I wrote to the manager of a restaraunt recently because of the poor service. They were nearly empty, and we still couldn’t get served. The manager wrote a nice note back to me inviting me to return - his treat. A few years back I complained to Circuit City and got no satisfaction from them at all - I still haven’t been back. Of course, my little bitty business won’t bankrupt them, but they have lost a few thousands of dollars of my business (new computers and big screen TVs) ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/37 "2006-12-15T14:58:03Z")
I’m easy to please, so I rarely complain. In the instances that I do, I generally do it with a carefully worded e-mail, and if possible include a bit of praise. I’ve worked retail and restaurant jobs, and I know that the person who usually gets hit with the shit isn’t the actual person at fault. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/38 "2006-12-15T15:26:28Z")
I bitch about things like that all the time. But I think I’m just as quick with a compliment to the manager as I am with a complaint. One instance comes to mind, when a group of us were at a pub in Vegas, and everybody got served but me, even those who arrived an hour late. The waitress, who was new, was trying, but the kitchen kept losing the order or screwing it up. When I called over the manager, several of us got our food free (not me though…I never did get my meal.) When I left, I made it a point to tell the manager to 1) fire the kitchen staff, and 2) not blame the waitress, who was doing her best in a bad situation. We also left her a substantial tip. I would have returned the vinegar and written a letter to the company, and told the ASP to go F himself and walked out of the store. The boots can wait until I get a decent salesman to help. ---
**Author:** ![Carlyjay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Carlyjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carlyjay)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/39 "2006-12-15T15:28:35Z")
[QUOTE=Ferret Herder] I detest people who bitch and moan about the slightest issue with the intent of getting free items [/QUOTE] I know people who do this pretty regularly, and it drives me insane. Look, I’m sure it was annoying when your steak wasn’t as warm as you liked, but it’ll take five minutes for them to throw it back on the grill and get it warm. Do you really think you deserve a free dinner for that? Grrr. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197/40 "2006-12-15T15:55:56Z")
[QUOTE=Veuve\_ClicquotNJ] He brought her into his office and bitched her out in front of me. She apologized and was sobbing. I felt bad for about 2 seconds, but hey - if you’re having that bad of a day that a polite request for a receipt sends you over the falls, you need to consider another line of work. VCNJ~ [/QUOTE] I think this is awful-- not what _you_ did, but the manager berating her in front of a customer. The manager should have apologized to you and perhaps offered some sort of “consoloation prize” but he should never discipline his employees in front of others. > [@Cyn](#): > > I will compliment if I am pleased. I do this far more often than I complain. If I get good service (especially if the service person seems to be having a bad day yet still is friendly and helpful) I write a letter to the store and if they have a main office, I send a copy of it to them. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-person-who-complains-re-goods-services/384197.md?page=3)