# Are You A Poet? Then Show It! 2-Electric Boogaloo **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** poetry\ **Created:** [April 25, 2023, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141 "2023-04-25T00:38:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/1 "2023-04-25T00:38:16Z")
Back at the turn of the century ( or thereabouts) I started a contest to determine who was the best poet of the SDMB: [Are You A Poet? Then Show It! - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it/31270/68) It has been about 22 and 1/2 years and time to crown a new SDMB Poet Lariat šŸ˜„ Here, slightly modified is the original invite. \*Iā€™m searching high, Iā€™m searching low For the Bestest Poet of the IMHO Be it happy or sad, verbose or terse I invite yā€™all to send in your verse You can post in the form of a limerick If youā€™ve got some original schtick But if you put in a bucket Or a girl from Nantucket Youā€™re chances of winning ainā€™t slick Haiku can be used Poetry touching the heart Dreams of pulp and ink So send in your best effort, and let loose your muse All poems will be welcomed and none will I refuse [I ask only that it be original verse To avoid nasty letters, or lawsuits, or worse\* In about a month we will vote on the winner. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/2 "2023-04-25T02:09:04Z")
I wanna be poet laureate of the SD. Let me study on this.šŸ¤” ---
**Author:** ![Blindmellowjelly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blindmellowjelly/32/13920_2.png) [@Blindmellowjelly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blindmellowjelly)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/3 "2023-04-25T02:46:31Z")
I always wanted to start a Japanese style ā€œHaikai No Rengaā€ for all to participatr in renku". ā€œEarthyā€, snd even witty and vulgar chain Japanese poetry. Like graffiti poetry. One experience and line with nature extrapolating into the nextā€¦ haiku like, but linked. Should I open here, or in my own OP? ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/4 "2023-04-25T02:51:38Z")
Post here please, and youā€™ll be the first! From what youā€™ve described, it wonā€™t be the worst. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/5 "2023-04-25T03:17:47Z")
Iā€™ve heard of a young _man_ from Nantucket, but a _girl_? šŸ¤Ø What would her distinguishing feature be? ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/6 "2023-04-25T03:25:22Z")
Iā€™ve written exactly one Iā€™m happy with, so here it is! It has a 6/5 syllables per line structure, which even I find takes a little getting used to when reciting it. But it seems to work to me. **Little creatures** Small ones of the rock pool Short is your time here My second is your day My day is your year You long for the tideā€™s turn To bring all you need Its advent is your spring A spring tide indeed Oh how must you feel fear Each time it does wane Drawn off by some fierce force To be othersā€™ gain Not your turn but now theirs Is that not fair play? Just a few more of them Then done is your day Our life is but one tide That comes in full flood We feast of its bounty From sapling to bud We live as though that is Our permanent state Take all thatā€™s on offer Until itā€™s too late Our tide starts to recede Right under our nose Heads now above water As quietly it goes Skin wrinkled and prunish From bathing too much Our strength it is failing No water as crutch So you of the rock pool Take this as your crumb Possess you of patience - A new tide will come While we who stand watching We will see but one One wax and one waning And then we are done. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/7 "2023-04-25T03:27:05Z")
There was a young girl from Nantucket Couldnā€™t carry a tune in a bucket She was totally tone-deaf Knew not treble or bass clef ā€œHey, how 'bout a song?ā€ ā€œNo, Iā€™ll duck it.ā€ ETA: In response to @terentii . ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/8 "2023-04-25T03:30:22Z")
Never count the years When a memory arrives Of too much alcohol Too much flirting Too short a skirt And a night of fun Never count the years When a memory arrives Of late night chats Ideas shared between friends Writing your otherself In a shared world Never count the years When a memory arrives Of a surprise knock that Reveals a friend in surprise Someone who is gone 12 months later Never count the years When a memory arrives Of a necklace Broken in three parts And a forever that Time pulled apart Never count the years On the memories, good and bad That define part of you They will always appear To be closer in the mirror Than they are in reality (Iā€™ve been trying to write a poem a day for a full year. This is one I wrote back in January. ) ---
**Author:** ![Blindmellowjelly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blindmellowjelly/32/13920_2.png) [@Blindmellowjelly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blindmellowjelly)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2023, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/9 "2023-04-25T03:39:36Z")
Ok, then Haikai no Rengaā€¦ my only distinctions, or requirements, or loose rules, is that it should have a etandard haiku 5-7-5 sylabbary or syllabus. 4-6-4 is also acceptable. It also has to have a jacket of season. Meld into the other with wit and panache. I will start: Rain and Cold, sog seat. First Day of Landscaping Mows, Dog is going deaf. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 9:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/10 "2023-05-02T09:58:31Z")
Is this a ā€œone poem per personā€ contest? ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/11 "2023-05-02T14:56:12Z")
Hi! Bye! ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/12 "2023-05-02T16:01:20Z")
Multiple poems are welcome, but only one per post. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/13 "2023-05-02T16:13:55Z")
Itā€™s been a long time since Iā€™ve tried, and I was tempted, but the best poet on the Dope today doesnā€™t even know sheā€™s a poet. Consider the following verse by our own Beckdawrek: # Bad, bad, bad: I Did It Again So ā€¦ Here goes nothing. I wander around the webz looking for freebies. Free samples. Free subscriptions. Free books. Free snacks. Free socks. (Yay!, toddler socks will soon be needed) I get something nearly everyday at this point. Itā€™s getting ridiculous. I got chip clips today. Nice!! Well the other day I got something labeled ā€˜airline cupā€™ No instructions. It has a USB cable. Hmmm? Why does a cup need USB hook up? Itā€™s shaped like a drinking cup. Has a top. I tug around on it. It opens. Oh, my. You canā€™t put a drink in that. I donā€™t think. Omg! Itā€™s not a cup at all.šŸ˜® The insides are pink and fleshy looking. Oh shit. I know what this is\*. I cannot believe I got it for free. Did I get it free? I may have clicked something untoward. I have a card attached to my Google acct. I better look. There in all itā€™s glory is my ā€˜airline cupā€™, costing me $39.91. From a company called ā€˜Jianghx, Well fitting clothing ā€™ This ainā€™t no freakinā€™ clothes Iā€™ve ever seen. Iā€™m getting a refund. I look them up and find a customer service number. I get someone on the phone and ask for a refund. I give him the item number, my name and stuff. He clicks away and says ā€œOhā€ and asked if it is damaged or not working, wrong size and could I give him an idea why I donā€™t want/or need it. Duh? Imma girl, ordered it by mistake or size? I choose size. I said itā€™s ā€œToo smallā€ I swear he laughed out loud. He says heā€™ll send me a return package and a mailing label. Then ā€˜cricketsā€™ I asked 3 times ā€œAre you there?ā€ Maybe 2 minutes go by (Iā€™m getting my refund, I stay with the call) and finally he says ā€œSorry, I consulted my Lead. We donā€™t accept returns on ā€˜airline cupsā€™ I think youā€™ll be happy to know weā€™ll provide a full refund.ā€ I laughed out loud. ā€œDo you want a refund to your card or would you like an e-gift card?ā€ For a brief moment I considered an e-gift card. Wondering about a Well fitting clothing company selling ā€˜airline cupsā€™ like this and what else they may have. No, no, refund my card I tell him. It begs the question, how dumb do I have to be to accidentally order this? I donā€™t need contact with the outside world, clearly. šŸ«” BTW - My card was refunded. * * * Other free verse gems abound by her in MPSIMS. Just look under threads starting with ā€œBad, Bad, Badā€. This stuff is gold. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/14 "2023-05-02T16:17:00Z")
**Poke** He picked up the universe, Gave it a poke. The universe cried, ā€œIs this some kind of joke?ā€ The scientist said, ā€œItā€™s just something we do: To poke until poking Reveals what is true.ā€ The universe laughed With a voice full of rue: ā€œHow funny - Iā€™m doing The same thing to you.ā€ ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/15 "2023-05-02T21:31:17Z")
I posted one some years ago about our cat knocking something off the kitchen counter, but I canā€™t find it now. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2023, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/16 "2023-05-02T23:38:19Z")
The works of Ed Zotti Were worth every zloty When writing some scat About Schrƶdingerā€™s cat But heā€™s kind of a challenger To old J.D.Salinger Reclusive Seclusive Though not much wrong with that Sure, sharing the spotlight With Cecil is alright But it bruises the ego To be the placebo And itā€™s tricky, I reckon To be the _vade mecum_ Applauded Unlauded Itching like impetigo But his book had its spine held By some sideshow on _Seinfeld_ And itā€™s wisdom and wit Has survived quite a bit So which glory is greater? Weā€™re still here years later Still teeming Daydreaming Writing poems and sh\*t. ---
**Author:** ![NinthAcolyte](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ninthacolyte/32/13676_2.png) [@NinthAcolyte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinthAcolyte)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/17 "2023-05-03T00:01:51Z")
If I reached up and took A piece of moon To give to you, The moon would be A little smaller, And there would be a piece that no-one else could see. If you kept it in your pocket You would always know Just where it was. I could look into the sky And see the rest, And know that, too, Like I know you. ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/18 "2023-05-03T02:06:23Z")
When I donā€™t know what To write, I turn to silly Haiku like this one ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/19 "2023-05-03T02:53:04Z")
**George Washington by Happy Lendervedder** Our nationā€™s father, a father of none. He married Martha, with a daughter and son. He wore a wig, all powdered white, And took it off for bed at night. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141/20 "2023-05-03T04:30:09Z")
When nightfall cools the desert sands And shadows fill the summer sky Lethargic lilts of lullabies Stream softly through the holy lands And calm the caravan to rest. A secret moon, half-seen, half-guessed Gives feeble light at end of day Its heart a million miles away. Like you. How can its languid stare Look down on MontrĆ©al, and find you there? Sepulchral dunes, dry, dark and deep Frame figures full of fitful sleep Who half-remember jungle streams Those lush lagoons adorning dreams To freshen sun-scorched skin anew. But I can only dream of you. I loved you when demure and deft I love you now thereā€™s little left I loved you through the grace and grime Will love you through the end of time. Drunk on _lā€™amour, et les eaux fraĆ®ches_ Eschewing food, but tasting flesh Sweet spellcraft shrouding summer swoons. Still echoes there in ancient tunes. Thereā€™s magic in the midnight moon. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-a-poet-then-show-it-2-electric-boogaloo/983141.md?page=2)