# Are You An Alien Shapeshifting Reptile Person? I am. Allegedly. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 1, 2013, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885 "2013-11-01T23:21:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2013, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/21 "2013-11-04T15:56:42Z")
Well, when they were handing out the black helicopters and the plantations full of serfs, I must have missed the memo, because I didn’t get mine. I am white, male, college-educated, and of Christian ancestry. The Establishment owes me, man. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2013, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/22 "2013-11-04T16:21:01Z")
I’m clearly a Reptillian because of my extensive power over international affairs and intrigue, but the interesting bit is that I don’t actually think that I’m a Reptillian. What’s truly crazy is that I don’t have the requisite eye color, my hair isn’t red, my hearing and blood pressure are totally average, and my eyesight not so good, and I’ve never even seen a UFO… The only remaining explanation is that I’m so deep undercover that I don’t even know who I am, I’m not a standard Reptillian, and so I have to be some kind of Manchurian Candidate sort of Lizard Person. We’re through the looking glass, here, people. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2013, 8:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/23 "2013-11-05T08:45:45Z")
I am also a reptilian, which explains why I am always so cold. I wish I was better at the shape-shifting thing though. There does seem to be a lot of us. I, for one, welcome our new reptilian overlords … I mean “us”. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2013, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/24 "2013-11-05T21:16:41Z")
The best part of the article is the radio bit of Louis CK grilling Donald Rumsfeld on whether or not he is a lizard person. I listened to the full version (okay, less edited version) and laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes. [Are you a lizard, sir?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dK8Y2nO_8TM) ---
**Author:** ![Philliam](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/philliam/32/3011_2.png) [@Philliam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philliam)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2013, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/25 "2013-11-05T23:21:10Z")
…So that’s why I’m always checking the Pet Food aisle to see if they’ve got Purina Snake Chow on sale. Who knew? ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/26 "2013-11-06T03:53:56Z")
Are we supposed to be surprised to discover that someone called **Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor** is an alien shapeshifting reptile person? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/27 "2013-11-06T04:26:38Z")
[Alligator Woman](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hMttCO2yIo) ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/28 "2013-11-06T04:38:38Z")
Everybody with low BP is reptile-compatible; apparently the relatively-low BPs around the Med are linked to having lizards up the family tree rather than to diet. This means the whole “start of Western civilization” thing was caused by a UFO landing! ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/29 "2013-11-06T05:27:14Z")
I am not a reptile! I am Canadian! ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/30 "2013-11-06T05:35:13Z")
This might explain why I can never decipher those Captcha “Are You Human?” tests when signing up on other sites. Also, my prehensile penis. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2013, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/31 "2013-11-06T14:53:49Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > Well, now I don’t feel special. > > But if we are all Reptilians, _who is controlling us_? [Mice.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_races_and_species_in_The_Hitchhiker%27s_Guide_to_the_Galaxy#Mice) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/32 "2014-01-26T18:18:14Z")
I just realized–this makes “ **V** ” A documentary. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/33 "2014-01-26T21:46:30Z")
So that’s why I slow down every winter – all that cold is jelling my blood. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Nylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/77aa72/32.png) [@Mr.Nylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Nylock)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/34 "2014-01-26T21:59:35Z")
I know how you feel, I’m part sasquach. Praise Bob ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/35 "2014-01-26T22:00:57Z")
I can explain all my scars and my compassion for mankind, while significant, has limits. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/36 "2014-01-26T22:56:35Z")
Low blood pressure + love of space and science = reptilian ??? ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/37 "2014-01-26T23:00:05Z")
Only 1/3 of me is reptilian. ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/38 "2014-01-26T23:09:30Z")
I am either a reptilian, or have one somewhere in my genetic background. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2014, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/39 "2014-01-26T23:39:23Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > Well, now I don’t feel special. > > But if we are all Reptilians, _who is controlling us_? [Rabbits.](http://www.devilbunnies.org/) It’s [del]turtles[/del] conspiracy theories all the way [del]down[/del] up. ---
**Author:** ![Kalea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b487fb/32.png) [@Kalea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalea)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2014, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885/40 "2014-01-27T20:51:07Z")
My mom has always said that my love of sun means I’m part lizard. This quiz just proves her right. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-an-alien-shapeshifting-reptile-person-i-am-allegedly/672885.md?page=1)