# Are you flattered or offended when you get hit on my members of the same sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 31, 2011, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918 "2011-12-31T04:46:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/21 "2011-12-31T16:25:29Z")
I’m a bi lady, and I’m definitely flattered. Hell, I kind of wish more ladies hit on me. ---
**Author:** ![SDMBKL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sdmbkl/32/7297_2.png) [@SDMBKL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SDMBKL)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/22 "2011-12-31T16:30:26Z")
I voted “Go to bed slm2955”. I don’t get what this is about. What’s the point of this discussion? There was one time when I got hit on by a member of the _opposite sex_ in an academic building. I wasn’t interested, though. I was more freaked out than interested in hitting on back. I don’t care if it’s a member of the opposite sex or of the same sex. If someone’s following you creepily, then you have the right to be afraid and run for safety! ---
**Author:** ![Renee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/renee/32/287_2.png) [@Renee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renee)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/23 "2011-12-31T16:33:53Z")
I’m not offended, but it kind of feels weird to me. There are a couple of stores I shop at that have women who appear to be lesbians who work there, and I catch them staring at me a lot. It’s just sort of uncomfortable, but I guess it’s uncomfortable when a male employee acts that way, too…I don’t know where I’m going with this, really. I do find myself less comfortable with female attention than male, but “offended” isn’t the right word. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/24 "2011-12-31T17:18:13Z")
Never had it happen, and it’s unlikely it ever will. I would probably just say, “sorry, but you got me wrong,” if it did. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/25 "2011-12-31T17:21:01Z")
I moved some posts in the other, non-poll thread (now closed) into this thread. — Ellen; tidy. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/26 "2011-12-31T17:29:44Z")
irritated. The person would have to be clueless. ---
**Author:** ![Tixenfleaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9a140/32.png) [@Tixenfleaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tixenfleaz)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/27 "2011-12-31T17:33:51Z")
I was once hit on by a young, very handsome Indian Doctor while I was doing clinicals at a local hospital. Me being a southern boy, and it being the eighties, I would’ve thought to find this annoying. Nope, I was flattered. Coulda had me a Doctor… ---
**Author:** ![MichaelEmouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/michaelemouse/32/101_2.png) [@MichaelEmouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MichaelEmouse)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/28 "2011-12-31T17:34:14Z")
> [@Magiver](#): > > irritated. The person would have to be clueless. Why, because your manly manliness just shines through that much that you couldn’t be homosexual? ---
**Author:** ![Candyman74](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Candyman74](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candyman74)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/29 "2011-12-31T17:34:56Z")
Neither, really. Not sure how I feel, but I don’t feel anything particularly, I don’t think. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/30 "2011-12-31T17:43:49Z")
Intimidated? If I had more than the very meager number of data points that I do (scattered over a whole lifetime), I might be more confident in my answer. Hell I’m probably hit upon more by gays than straight women (I’m hetero BTW)-and even when I’ve been in good shape (like I am now) there’s no discernible difference in the quantity. I end up wondering “WTF does she want from me exactly?” and my imagination does the rest, usually assuming the worst. :smack: I’ve got the makings of a new poll tho… ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/31 "2011-12-31T18:29:02Z")
> [@MichaelEmouse](#): > > Why, because your manly manliness just shines through that much that you couldn’t be homosexual? no because polite social interactions don’t involve walking up to someone blindly and hitting on them. There are basic cues such as eye contact, smiling, and gestures that invite a person to flirt. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/32 "2011-12-31T18:40:34Z")
> [@Magiver](#): > > There are basic cues such as eye contact, smiling, and gestures that invite a person to flirt. What, being amicable? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/33 "2011-12-31T21:24:22Z")
I’m gay, but it depends on the person flirting with me. ---
**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/34 "2011-12-31T21:55:16Z")
Happened twice in my life. First time I was freaked out. I was only about 18 and some stranger tried to pick me up in a mall restroom. I was really kind of horrified that there was something about me that made him think I might be interested. The second time I was in my 30s, was in a bar that wasn’t really a gay bar but was considered kind of gay friendly, with an artsy-theater crowd. I was a lot more worldly and enlightened by then and I was kind of amused. Like was mentioned above it was kind of like being hit on by a woman that I was not at all attracted to. That happened a few times too. ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/35 "2011-12-31T22:18:49Z")
Straight guy and voted “flattered” though “shocked” would be more accurate - I simply don’t meet typical minimum gay male grooming standards. Although I suppose I might be considered a Bear. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/36 "2011-12-31T22:43:03Z")
I’m gay, and I’d be more than flattered, I’d assume the person is hitting on EVERYONE, and it’s simply my turn. Of course it happens a lot more rarely now, as opposed to back in my 20s. But yes, it does still happen. Also, since I’m in a monogamous relationship, it’s something I’m not looking for, so I probably wouldn’t notice. Oh, and if I got hit on by a woman . . . flattered, but no thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2011, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/37 "2011-12-31T23:51:17Z")
Flattered and always surprised and flustered. ---
**Author:** ![missinformation](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@missinformation](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missinformation)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/38 "2012-01-01T01:09:53Z")
First time, irritated because it happened at my work. Kept following me around, asking me questions (she worked security and I was in the signage dept)…told her i was straight and she kept trying to touch my hair…fwiw, i don’t like ANY stranger to touch my hair…I cut my own, thank you very much… After that, a umm, no thanks, straight…response ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/39 "2012-01-01T01:14:42Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > What, being amicable? amicable is not the same as flirting. Generally, most people go to a bar to be around other people and “amicable” is pretty much the standard of behavior. Women constantly get hit on by men who either have never had any social skills training or are just plain stupid. The last gay man who hit on me was stinking drunk (literally). I felt bad for him. His gadar was broke and he reeked of BO. probably a country song in there somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![rogerbox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/76d3ee/32.png) [@rogerbox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rogerbox)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2012, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918/40 "2012-01-01T02:16:57Z")
> [@SDMBKL](#): > > There was one time when I got hit on by a member of the _opposite sex_ in an academic building. I wasn’t interested, though. I was more freaked out than interested in hitting on back. I don’t care if it’s a member of the opposite sex or of the same sex. **If someone’s following you creepily, then you have the right to be afraid and run for safety!** What does my bolded section have to do with a thread about being HIT ON? Following you creepily \<\> Hit on [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-flattered-or-offended-when-you-get-hit-on-my-members-of-the-same-sex/607918.md?page=3)