# Are you Going To Hell? Why? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 1, 2002, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885 "2002-11-01T19:41:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/21 "2002-11-02T04:17:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cjhoworth \* > \*\*Oh yes. There’s also that slight matter of introducing **agentfroot** to fencing and the SDMB. How many bags of marshmallows are we going to need? 😃 > > CJ \*\* Keep it up and we can have a Fencing dopefest sometime! Beware Osips Bukler of Many colors! Anyway I am going to hell for many reason. Most of those reasons have passed under the radar until someone reported me and I got threadspotted. err don’t have a link, but it was the thread about redoign the bible with all looney toon characters. ---
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/22 "2002-11-02T04:19:25Z")
_sigh_ Buckler I shear I typed Buckler… fricking hampsters are eating only letters now in my posts. Die Vermin! ---
**Author:** ![happyheathen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5e925/32.png) [@happyheathen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/happyheathen)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/23 "2002-11-02T04:20:41Z")
because I don’t want to spend an eternity with the folks who are certain they are going elsewhere… an eternity with Falwell? I _really_ don’t think so… ---
**Author:** ![agentfroot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@agentfroot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/agentfroot)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/24 "2002-11-02T04:24:21Z")
If CJ is going to hell for influencing/corrupting me, I’m going there too (pah, I’ve done more than enough to earn it without her help…). I don’t care for marshmallows, but I’ll get some graham crackers and chocolate! When I read Dante’s “Inferno” in high school, I had a hard time deciding which circle I’d fit into the best. I suppose I’ll mainly go to hell for being Wiccan, but there are also the matters of sloth, liking women, occasional gluttony, many impure thoughts, and impersonating a nun on Halloween. Also, I don’t believe in hell. So THERE! Hey, come back here with that handbasket! ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/25 "2002-11-02T05:41:17Z")
I had pre-marital sex. Lots and lots and lots of pre-marital sex. I actually blew off seminary in HS so I could go home and have lots of sex. I would double back from Church so I could go home and have lots of sex. Two days after my BF was baptized into the church we were having lots of sex. Of course, that’s when I still believed in hell, and I was really worried about it. Obviously not too worried though, because we never stopped. Now I don’t believe in God, so even without the fun sex, I’d still be sent to hell ---
**Author:** ![LindyHopper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@LindyHopper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LindyHopper)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/26 "2002-11-02T06:52:33Z")
Hmm… Well, let’s go down the list of the seven Deadly Sins: 1. Lust. Well, duh. 2. Sloth. Pretty much a given, what with my unemployed status and all. 3. Greed. I like to think not. 4. Wrath. Only toward idiots in traffic, generally. 5. Envy. Most of the time, no. Only when I see people who seem to have everything while leading what I consider an amoral life. 6. Pride. Nope. 7. Gluttony. Well, I like food, but given the definition of “desire to consume more than you require”, I think not. I can stop when I’m full. So, I’m probably going to Hell, but only for two out of seven (maybe three, if you added up partial credit). 😉 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f08c70/32.png) [@Fugazi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/27 "2002-11-02T09:16:30Z")
[Freddy Mercury] Beelzbub has a devil put aside for me [/Freddy Mercury] Speaking of 7 deadly sins, I think we should dump lust and add selfishness. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/28 "2002-11-02T10:42:16Z")
I am doomed, DOOMED, I tell you. I have committed all of the seven deadly sins and a few more to boot!! I am a SINNER, yes brethren, I have SINNED, and I’m here for redemption…or at least to know that I’ll meet a few familiar faces and names when I get chucked into the pits. See ya down there folks…and seeing the marshmallows are already spoken for, how about I bring a few conkers (chestnuts) to roast in the fiery pits of hell and damnation? At least we’ll be well fed sinners… ---
**Author:** ![galen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecc23a/32.png) [@galen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/29 "2002-11-02T18:44:27Z")
Well, I guess I’ll be there too for most of the reasons noted above. It might not be so bad, though. Consider that all the Christian fundamentalists will be in heaven. We won’t have to put up with Falwell, Pat Robertson, et. al. and all their followers. Nobody around to criticise us for our lust and other “sins”. On the other hand, maybe one of the bits flipped over in the great cosmic computer and everything has been reversed and all the Dopers will end up in Heaven and those other folks can spend eternity tending the great campfire in the neatherworld. Maybe God has a sense of humor and is playing a great practical joke. Who knows. ---
**Author:** ![Journeyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/779978/32.png) [@Journeyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Journeyman)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/30 "2002-11-02T21:40:09Z")
I consider my own existance proof enough that if there is a god, he has a twisted sense of humor. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/31 "2002-11-02T22:54:07Z")
I’m going to Hell because I don’t believe in it… ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2002, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/32 "2002-11-02T23:23:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by His4ever \* > \*\*Uh, scuse me, but what’s so funny about hell? Seems to be a lot of joking about it. Personally, I don’t find hell to be a joking matter but that’s just me. \*\* The funniest thing about hell is watching people get worked up and bent out of shape over something that doesn’t even exist as far as I can tell 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![TVGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/82dd89/32.png) [@TVGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/33 "2002-11-03T00:00:12Z")
Well, let’s see, according to the God that I don’t believe in (or that God’s followers to be more precise) I guess I qualify for the following reasons: I’m a flaming, proud, homosexual As previously mentioned, I have no use for a supreme being or “god” I’ve shoplifted I’ve lied I’ve taken unholy drink and tobacco I’ve had plenty of impure thoughts (and work hard at that, actually) I ride a Harley I work in commercial television broadcasting I eat meat I wear leather I participated in a flag burning once I don’t belive in “organic” anything I could go on, but as you can see, I qualify for a place in that nonexistent hot and evil place based on any number of weights and measures. Shit, I guess I’m doomed. Anybody got any more salsa - I’m out. Yawn. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/34 "2002-11-03T01:03:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Journeyman \* > \*\*I consider my own existance proof enough that if there is a god, he has a twisted sense of humor. \*\* Yup. Just twisted enough to send all of us to hell. See y’all there! I’ll be first in line. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/35 "2002-11-03T01:05:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mr. Cynical \* > \*\* > > The funniest thing about hell is watching people get worked up and bent out of shape over something that doesn’t even exist as far as I can tell 🙂 \*\* High five, bro. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/36 "2002-11-03T03:01:42Z")
I like Celine Dion. ---
**Author:** ![IcicleFuzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ba8739/32.png) [@IcicleFuzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IcicleFuzz)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/37 "2002-11-03T04:57:34Z")
Now that’s just twisted… ---
**Author:** ![Freyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freyr/32/5763_2.png) [@Freyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freyr)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/38 "2002-11-03T06:59:10Z")
If I were governed by the rules of the J/C/I deity, then yeah, I suppose I would. But since I’m outside of His jurisdiction, I’m going to the Summer Lands. 😃 \*\*H4E wrote: Uh, scuse me, but what’s so funny about hell? Seems to be a lot of joking about it. Personally, I don’t find hell to be a joking matter but that’s just me.\*\* _ **WHOOSH** _ My guess is that **H4E** uses some super, industrial strength hairspray 'cause she doesn’t even feel the disturbance in the air when those comments go flying over her head. ---
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/39 "2002-11-03T07:50:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TVGuy \* > \*\*I ride a Harley > I work in commercial television broadcasting > \*\* Ah yes, the seldom-quoted eleventh and twelfth commandments. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885/40 "2002-11-03T17:14:16Z")
I am probably going to hell, because i have no intention of going back to any church anytime soon. and my evil thoughts invlove Molotov Cocktails.😃 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-going-to-hell-why/134885.md?page=3)