# Are you known by your legal name, or a diminuitive?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 26, 2025, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069 "2025-12-26T12:03:23Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/1 "2025-12-26T12:03:24Z")

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My legal name is David. I hate it. I am much happier when people call me just plain Dave. That’s me. My mother hated that, but that’s how my friends called me, how my teachers called me at school, how everybody called me. Something my aunt never understood. “Oh, but your mother like ‘David’ so much.” Tough shit Auntie, I am Dave. D-A-V-E, that’s my name. David is the name of some character in the Bible. Yeah, I have to use David when I renew my driver’s license or renew my passport, but I am Dave for all other purposes. I had to tell Auntie that if she called me “David” one more time, I was hanging up the phone. She did, so I did.

Anybody else in the same boat? Your parents gave you a name, but you hated it, and preferred an alternative?

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**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/2 "2025-12-26T12:48:47Z")

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I’m indifferent to my name. It has its pluses and minuses.

But it also has no diminutive form (compare e.g. “Ryan” or “Craig” or “Ethan”), so unless I wanted to go with my middle name, I didn’t really have a choice.

Thus, my full legal first name is my everyday name, for better and worse.

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**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/3 "2025-12-26T12:50:11Z")

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Nope. Parents gave all of us short simple one syllable names. Can’t get shorter and still be pronounceable. No nicknames either.

But I know a bunch of people who feel the same as the OP does. And a few who insist on the long form: no Bill or Will for them; they are _William_ dammit!

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**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/4 "2025-12-26T12:53:59Z")

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I’ve never been fond of my first name but it’s easy to spell and pronounce although it’s not particularly common. Rather than a diminutive, I have a nickname that a lot of people know me by, that gets used quite a lot.

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/5 "2025-12-26T13:03:11Z")

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I wonder how everyone started calling you Dave.

I was given a first name and a middle name. The first name was super common, and the middle name very unusual. My parents called me by my middle name. When i went to school, the teacher called out my first name, and i told her, no, i go by the middle name. So that’s what everyone called me in school, too.

This is why i find laws against schools accepting a child’s chosen name to be weird and anti-trans. I’m pretty sure they almost all used to accept a child’s chosen name.

I never felt any connection to that first name, so when i got married, i changed my name. My first name as well as my last name.

So yup, i go by my legal name. But i haven’t always.

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**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/6 "2025-12-26T13:07:45Z")

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Like the OP, most people just leave off the last letter of mine.

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**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/7 "2025-12-26T13:18:36Z")

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> [@puzzlegal](#):
>
> I wonder how everyone started calling you Dave.

The same way the neighbourhood kids called Jonathon, “Johnny.” or Gregory, “Greg,”

I liked “Dave.” It worked for me.

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**Author:** ![Dandan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@Dandan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dandan)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/8 "2025-12-26T13:19:59Z")

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My Mommy called me Danny until the day she died, almost 20 years ago. I didn’t mind because she was, you know, my Mommy. Don’t know anyone else who answers to the actual diminutive, such as Stevie or Davey.

Dan

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/9 "2025-12-26T13:21:53Z")

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I know a guy who was Johnny until he was 32 and married, but then decided to switch to his legal name, Juan.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/10 "2025-12-26T13:38:44Z")

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I went by a diminutive till I was about 20, then (because of a boyfriend who didn’t do nicknames) I started using my given name.

For a couple of years when I was in the Navy, I was known as Fred because a coworker forgot my name and called me that, and it stuck. Once I went to my next duty station, Fred was no more.

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**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/11 "2025-12-26T13:45:33Z")

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Neither I nor any of my many siblings go by any nicknames or diminutives. My parents do however call so me of us by both first and middle names, example “Catherine Ann”. But never Cathy or Cate or anything like that. Several of us have names that have common diminutives, sometimes multiple common diminutives (e.g. Ed, Ted, Ward, Eddie for Edward). Sometimes schoolmates, cousins or coworkers would try to use diminutives, but they never stuck. If anyone abbreviated my name, I will pointedly say my full given name. Doesn’t matter if you’re the mailroom clerk or the CEO or the Mayor (I’ve had all three try this).

But then we addressed our parents as Mother and Father from age 6 or so.

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**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/12 "2025-12-26T13:48:08Z")

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I go by my middle name, with the last letter dropped. Both my names are common as dirt for guys my age. My wife and kids go by their full first names. Our son’s name only has three letters, so it would be hard to shorten. Our son has a friend whose mother insists that her grown children be called by their full names, but no one in the friend group does.

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**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/13 "2025-12-26T14:02:37Z")

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My situation was even worse. My formal legal first name was an ethnic version of it. I never used it, and the Anglicized version of it that I used my whole life somehow became entrenched in all my records and was effectively my legal name, but my birth certificate still bore the original.

This caused problems when identity rules became stricter, so I had to formally change it via a legal change of name application. So now I have three first names: the original one on my old birth certificate, the formal one that is now legally recognized, and the diminutive form that I use every day. I hate it when strangers who don’t know my preference address me by my formal first name.

Anecdote: I always use my formal first name when signing up for services. Except once, many decades ago, I used the diminutive form when signing up for cable TV service. I don’t even subscribe to cable TV any more but I use the same company for Internet and telephone service. Here’s the point. I get quite a lot of junk mail addressed to the person with that diminutive first name.

No one else has that name on record. **No one.** Gee, I wonder how the scammers got my name and address? 🙄 No doubt the same place that the telephone scammers got my phone number!

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**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/14 "2025-12-26T14:23:22Z")

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> [@Spoons](#):
>
> Your parents gave you a name, but you hated it, and preferred an alternative?

Well, yeah, as a matter of fact. I went to court, put my money where my mouth is, and got a cool new legal name which is the only one I use IRL.

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**Author:** ![Die\_Capacitrix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/die_capacitrix/32/9_2.png) [@Die\_Capacitrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Die_Capacitrix)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/15 "2025-12-26T14:24:58Z")

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I use my legal name, but sometimes I get someone that decides to pronounce the silent e at the end (think Christine, but pronounced Christine-e) due to their pronunciation rules.

Hubby uses a diminutive form of his legal first name. His father had the same legal first name and used a different diminutive. His grandfather, also with the same legal first name, used a diminutive of his middle name. I think his great grandfather was the last one to use the legal first name.

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**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/16 "2025-12-26T14:42:17Z")

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Never had a nickname, but have always been called by my _middle_ name for some reason. My first name is one typically subject to a number of nickname situations. My middle name none at all outside references to _Bewitched_ (which, suprisingly, nobody ever went with).

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**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/17 "2025-12-26T14:53:22Z")

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I use my legal first name and it doesn’t really have any nicknames. I do occasionally get addressed via email (or the opening words of a phone call) by the male version of my name (think Shawna/Shawn) because I work in a male-dominated industry and so _of course_ the engineer must be male, right?

My pronouns are in my email signature both to signal acceptance and allyship and to hopefully get people to _read_ _my contact information_ and stop misgendering me.

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**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/18 "2025-12-26T14:56:13Z")

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I use the one-syllable version casually, but the full version formally.

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**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/19 "2025-12-26T14:57:48Z")

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There are people who insist on an incorrect pronunciation of my wife’s name. They chop off a syllable at the end and replace a short vowel sound with a long one.

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**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2025, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/are-you-known-by-your-legal-name-or-a-diminuitive/1026069/20 "2025-12-26T15:00:13Z")

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The name on my birth certificate is a three syllable biblical name only ever used by strangers. Until kindergarten I was addressed by all by a two syllable version that screams “little boy”. That name stuck with some seldom encountered cousins and aunts to this day, but since age five, I have insisted on just the first syllable of my birth name.

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