# argh! urgent pirate ship question! **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [June 20, 2001, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414 "2001-06-20T02:04:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/21 "2001-06-20T14:26:48Z")
**They Call Me Sneeze** : > [@](#): > > Unfortunately, my figurehead is a bee, and so it doesnt have legs - Uh…don’t bees generally have legs? **tlmtlm59** , pirates never made anyone walk the plank; that was made up for pirate movies (or maybe for Peter Pan; I can’t remember). If pirates wanted to throw you over the side, they’d just throw you over the side. ---
**Author:** ![cmetzb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmetzb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmetzb)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/22 "2001-06-20T14:27:20Z")
Apparently they still do: [http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A12750-2001Jun17.html](http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A12750-2001Jun17.html) ---
**Author:** ![missdavis102](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7feea3/32.png) [@missdavis102](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missdavis102)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/23 "2001-06-20T14:28:04Z")
I’m with you, **Munch**. Pirate Theme Week? I am SO there! ---
**Author:** ![False\_God](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee7513/32.png) [@False\_God](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/False_God)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/24 "2001-06-20T16:04:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chronos \* > \*\*I’ve heard that supposedly, the less clad the figurehead was, the better luck for the ship. Interestingly, the figurehead on the _Bounty_ was a representation of Capt. Blythe’s wife, and therefore, had to be carved as fully-attired, for propriety’s sake. Draw your own conclusions, here. \*\* The reason I’ve always heard is that figureheads were depicted as naked chicks because they would “calm the savage seas” with the sight of their breasts. I know if I was a killer wave, I’d be calmed right down. “Huh-huh, boobies.Huh-huh.” Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending), when they cast Ricki Lake as the animate figurehead in “Cabin Boy” they didn’t make this a condition of employment ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/25 "2001-06-20T17:30:28Z")
Wow, **cmetzb**! What an awsome story (especially since everyone survived and the ship was even recovered)! If the US Navy and Coast Guard were fighting Indonesian pirates instead of carrying nuclear warheads, periodically bombing Iraq and other countries, and intercepting drug runners and refugee boats I’d sign up in a minute! PS–Before anyone gets upset, I have the highest possible respect for the people who bravely serve their country in the Armed Forces. It’s not the military I dislike and don’t trust; it’s the civilians who tell them what to do. ---
**Author:** ![They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/They_Call_Me_Sneeze)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/26 "2001-06-20T19:53:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Munch \* > \*\*I think we’re all missing the main point here, folks! > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by They Call Me Sneeze \* > > \*\*at my work we are having a Pirate (!!!) Theme Week, > > \*\* > > Sneeze, I need you to send me an application, a reference, and a full description of my new job! Where in the world do you work?!? \*\* Argh! Yay pirates! I work for a coffee shop/cart thing. We have had lots of excellent themes in the past (80s theme, Muppets theme) but I think that pirate theme is far and away the best theme EVER. In Baltimore. It is by far the best job in the whole world (for me, at this point in my life, anyway), not only because we get to have pirate week, but because we get all the coffee drinks we can stomach. Shall I tell my boss that a guy (?) named Munch will be stopping in for an interview? After reading cmetzb’s article, though, I might have to retire as a barista and go be a pirate. I am deeply troubled by the fact that these pirates apparently use satellite phones and GPS equipment to get their booty. _Satellite phones?!_ You’re a pirate for crying out loud, you are supposed to accesorize with eye patches and parrots, not _satellite phones._ I’ll have to rig me up an old-timey sailing ship and teach these modern “pirates” a thing or too. But yeah - pirate theme week is the BEST! > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fiver \* > \*\* > Uh…don’t bees generally have legs? > \*\* Yes, Fiver, I know that bees have legs, but my bee did not. You know how Maggie Simpson doesnt have legs - she just has her blue baby uniform, and you never (rarely) see her legs, but they are implied? That is kind of how the bee is - legs would just have made him look weird. Argh! Captain Sneezebeard ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/27 "2001-06-20T20:03:20Z")
Ever read Herman Melville’s longish short story (or shortish novella) “Benito Cereno” ? Now THERE’S a figurehead to remember… ---
**Author:** ![Saltire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saltire/32/553_2.png) [@Saltire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saltire)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2001, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/28 "2001-06-20T20:42:13Z")
Just a couple of things to add: Several here have described the figurehead as being attached the end of the bowsprit. It was, but on the inboard end, at the base of the bowsprit. In other words, not out at the pointy end. [I’m sure everyone knew this, but it sounded strange the way it was being described.] I’ve heard a couple of things about the piracy problems in SE Asia and thereabouts. A close friend was an oiler on a freighter to Singapore once, and at that end of the journey his duties involved carrying a shotgun on nightwatch. He was never really told what a shotgun was supposed to do against a pirate vessel, and he was glad he didn’t have to find out. You’d think they’d use arms that could prevent a boarding, rather than wait for the bad guys to get there to start shooting. You’ll like this, Sneeze: When the replica of the Golden Hind duplicated Sir Francis Drake’s circumnavigation, they had some guns on board in case they met pirates. But, just in case, they also carried powder and balls for the cannons, and drilled the crew in their use. (I was told this by a member of the crew, when they stopped off in the U.S. during that trip.) ---
**Author:** ![They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/They_Call_Me_Sneeze)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/29 "2001-06-21T00:25:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Saltire \* > \*\*Just a couple of things to add: > You’ll like this, Sneeze: When the replica of the Golden Hind duplicated Sir Francis Drake’s circumnavigation, they had some guns on board in case they met pirates. But, just in case, they also carried powder and balls for the cannons, and drilled the crew in their use. (I was told this by a member of the crew, when they stopped off in the U.S. during that trip.) \*\* Argh! Avast! Ahoy! _That’s_ what I’m _talking_ about, man! Phew! It’s good to know that when I _do_ become a pirate, atleast there will is a proper group of pirate’s I can join up with. Thanks Saltire! Argh! Sneeze ---
**Author:** ![JillGat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc29f/32.png) [@JillGat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JillGat)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/30 "2001-06-21T02:42:46Z")
At my job, we have a “dress like a slob” week. Wait, that’s every week. Jill I’m a scientist, not a public figure! ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/31 "2001-06-21T03:37:57Z")
Say this ten times fast: “I was born on a pirate ship.” ---
**Author:** ![They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@They\_Call\_Me\_Sneeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/They_Call_Me_Sneeze)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/32 "2001-06-21T04:15:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dropzone \* > \*\*Say this ten times fast: > > “I was born on a pirate ship.” \*\* Iowa’s porn on an irate pimp? Really, what I got was “Iwasbornonapirateship,” but the Iowa thing kind of what it almost starts to sound like. I’m not sure I get it, though. Argh! Sneeze ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/33 "2001-06-21T07:26:19Z")
> [@](#): > > Several here have described the figurehead as being attached the end of the bowsprit. It was, but on the inboard end, at the base of the bowsprit. In other words, not out at the pointy end. [I’m sure everyone knew this, but it sounded strange the way it was being described.] Saltire, I cannot find anyone here describing “the figurehead as being attached the end of the bowsprit”. Maybe you can point it out to me? In any case, you are mistaken, the figurehead was never attached to the bowsprit (or maybe you can show me an example). It was attached to the stem or breakwater. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2001, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414/34 "2001-06-21T14:11:30Z")
Sneeze: Well, Baltimore is a bit far for me, so tell him that he narrowly escaped having a guy (yes) named Munch apply for a job. Saltire: Hey! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-urgent-pirate-ship-question/69414.md?page=1)