# Argh! Will I have to live with the embarrassment forever? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [August 1, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696 "2000-08-01T13:56:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/1 "2000-08-01T13:56:21Z")
My first stinkin’ moment off the lurkers’ list I’ve set myself up to be the object of ridicule for my entire doper existence. So I don’t know how to spell Latin nouns in the objective case! So it should be Carpe Felem! So I’m stoopit! According to the FAQ, you’re stuck with your registered handle for the rest of your natural existence. Is there any loophole that permits me to make a spelling correction? Or will I have to gather up my tattered dignity and crawl back under the bed with the dust bunnies, where I will live hermit-like for the next couple of decades, sustained only by gifts of little headless rodents the cats drag in? ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecccb3/32.png) [@Lord\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/2 "2000-08-01T14:24:02Z")
The best thing to do is e-mail **TubaDiva** at [tubadiva@aol.com](mailto:tubadiva@aol.com). She’ll fix it for you. And welcome. Jim ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/3 "2000-08-01T14:42:25Z")
JimB – thanks! I’ve e-mailed her and am waiting to see what she says. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/4 "2000-08-01T16:13:59Z")
Or you could go in the basis that some 3rd declension Latin nouns in the i-stem group take -em or -im indifferently, and at least one (IIRC turris) requires the -im ending. Felis is, I believe, an i-stem noun. These are believed to be holdovers from an Old Latin i-stem declension separate from the third declension, and you could always say you were using the Old Latin ending instead of the Classic, and come off looking erudite instead of klutzy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/5 "2000-08-01T16:19:39Z")
Not anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/6 "2000-08-01T16:45:43Z")
Hey, Polycarp, works for me! Now how do I turn this into a classy sig line? When I registered, I was thinking about felis, hence felim; about twenty minutes later I got a sinking feeling it should be felem, so I checked with a friend of mine who’s a wonderful and frighteningly knowledgable linguistics prof. She mentioned something about the e-stem/i-stem thing in her reply (as follows): “The Latin word for cat was ‘feles,’ genitive ‘felis,’ at least at first. Apparently later it was absorbed into the i-stems with a nominative ‘felis.’ I don’t know why. But by golly, I’m going to have to find out, now!” Anyway, her thought was that it should be felem. But your post gives me hope that there’s room to fudge the issue. And since Uncle Beer’s cryptic comment suggests I’m SOL on my request for correction, I guess I should begin to cultivate an insouciant, charmingly self-deprecatory attitude about it. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/7 "2000-08-01T19:28:10Z")
Not to be a mind-reader or anything, but I think UncleBeer’s cheeky comment was more about Polycarp’s statement that you could “come off looking erudite instead of klutzy.” Given that you’ve already posted that you think you may have named yourself in error, anyone who reads this thread will realize that you were just klutzy. On the bright side, you’ll only seem klutzy to those who actually understand Latin declinations, and even then you’ll seem the pinnance of sanity when compared to **Danielinthewolvesden**. Lions, Dan, lions. Yeesh. But insouciant, charmingly self-depreciating attitudes are always appreciated here. Besides, it could be worse. You could have mispelled your real name when you used it as your user name. Not that I know anyone who did that. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/8 "2000-08-01T20:03:22Z")
> [@](#): > > … UncleBeer’s cheeky comment … Yeah, what John said. 'Tis my forte. Or at least _I_ think it is. And I don’t really care what the rest of ya may think. ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/9 "2000-08-01T20:07:19Z")
But being as how this thread comes from a rank newbie, hardly anyone will notice, right? Anyway, TubaDiva to the rescue: she’s corrected the problem for me. So anyone who wanders into this thread now will simply wonder what the ding-dong I’m fussing about. I’m so grateful, I’m considering naming my first-born child after TubaDiva. Not that there’s likely to be one at this point. All things considered, it’s probably just as well I didn’t go with my first impulse and register as The Avenging Goddess of Verbiage. I do use it as my unofficial job title, but it’s a difficult handle to live up to. So…should I ask about the veiled reference to misspelling one’s own name? ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/10 "2000-08-01T20:09:02Z")
UncleBeer, obviously I did you a disservice imagining you were just trying to be helpful. Thanks for the vote of confidence! ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/11 "2000-08-01T21:10:13Z")
Um–“seize the cat”? ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/12 "2000-08-01T21:18:31Z")
yeppers, DDG. (And once you’ve got him, give him a big ole hug. It cheers 'em up.) ---
**Author:** ![tshirts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@tshirts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tshirts)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/13 "2000-08-01T23:42:21Z")
**Seize the Cat** has a very funny-clever ring to it. Hope to see more of you here. (There are plenty of cat lovers, I’ve noticed, though I never got along with my ex’s many cats.) ---
**Author:** ![Carpe\_Felem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@Carpe\_Felem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carpe_Felem)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2000, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/14 "2000-08-02T00:55:55Z")
Thank you for the kind words, tshirts. Actually, I’ve been thinking for years that I’d like to get the slogan printed up on a tee shirt, in the same style as the ubiquitous CARPE DIEM shirts, but I never got around to it. My ex decided he didn’t get along with my cats, too, though he inexplicably ended up taking one of them with him when we split. My new and improved husband is doing his best, he says, to ingratiate himself with the clowder. They like him much better than the old one. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2000, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/15 "2000-08-02T04:23:06Z")
All I can think of, is the time when my sister tried to “carpe felem”, almost twenty years ago… She still has the scars. Then again, that cat was a rather mean-tempered calico (are all calicoes mean-tempered? It sure seems like it) who didn’t like being seized. ---
**Author:** ![RM\_Mentock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e274bd/32.png) [@RM\_Mentock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RM_Mentock)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2000, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/16 "2000-08-02T05:44:48Z")
Names you won’t see on the board Carpe Willy Dorkinthebluesuit NoseFinger Wideopen Idontgetit unhunhunhunh PizzleWhip dugs They’ve all been changed to something that can be more readily declined. ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2000, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/argh-will-i-have-to-live-with-the-embarrassment-forever/27696/17 "2000-08-02T13:01:40Z")
Bad puppy! No biscuit! 😃