Arrogant Freeloading "Information" Seeking Asshats!

[glee]

@Fuzzy_Wombats

Profit?

What?

[Duke]

@glee

What?

1. Antagonize lawyers
2. ???
3. Profit

[DSYoungEsq]

@Squooshed

That’s arrogant asshat attorneys. It’s more alliterative that way!

Assonant, too, more so than alliterative.

[VinylTurnip]

@Squooshed

That’s arrogant asshat attorneys. It’s more alliterative that way!

Assonant, actually, as another attorney advised anteriorly.

[Crotalus]

@VinylTurnip

Assonant, actually, as another attorney advised anteriorly.

Assholes.

[Squooshed]

@Crotalus

Assholes.

Assiduously agree.

[Kimmy_Gibbler]

Oy! Lawyers toying with annoying factoids.

[Enderw24]

Glee,

I’m curious about something. Has there ever been a case you know of where a grandmaster used h2-h4 as his opening move? I’m not asking you whether it was sound or not, I’m just asking for INFORMATION on it because I’m considering doing that in my response as black in an upcoming match. So has it ever been done?
And, while I’ve got you here, was it sound?

But all you have to do is point me towards the games where they were used and I can do the rest. Just the games. Don’t show me an article from BCM about the h2-h4 opening because all that is is the article writer’s interpretation of the opening which doesn’t answer ANYTHING. If you want to know how the move turns out, you have to dig deeper and go to the game’s notation itself and NOT someone’s interpretation of what the game means.

I found a game with an h2-h3 opening and they won after capturing a pawn en passant so I have to believe that the en passant pawn capture is an integral part of the h-pawn opening. I think if I can convert that over to the black side’s response that would be crucial towards winning my match, is that right?
Wait, don’t tell me. I’m just looking for information
But I’ll take your opinion on the information as it applies to my game. No advice though.

Oh hey, while researching I found a three player chess board on sale for $50. Is that a score or is that a score? My game isn’t going to involve three player chess, but I thought I’d cite the rules anyway

The pieces move the same as in conventional chess, with some minor exceptions.

When passing through the center of the board, the diagonally moving pieces (bishopsm queens and pawns when capturing) have a choice of path direciton.

For the sake of symmetry, the queen is placed to the left of the king.

If the knight’s movement is confusing, remember that they always move to a square of the opposite color.

A player placed in check must get out of check if possible on his turn, but another player may try to help.

If you, in a check situation, put the player to the right in check and the player to your left also checks him, and he cannot move, it is the FIRST check that makes him mate.

After checkmating a player, you remove his king and his remaining pieces become yours. You do NOT get two moves though. You can, for instance, let his pawns reach the last row and promote by putting a piece in a square where the pawn can capture it (a real sacrifice). Obviously, any obtained pieces must not put your king in check.

Another way of explaining the rules:

THE CENTER: If a bishop or queen hit the center by a continuous diagonal movement, they have the choice of continuing in either direction.

PAWNS: The pawns may crown at both of the enemies’ back ranks. A pawn at the center may hit three squares. When a pawn crosses the line separating his army’s field, it finds itself at one of the enemies’ fields, and it will never be able to leave that field, as it moves only forward. En-passant moves are supported. Both enemies may take en-passant, but only as an immediate response. This means that leap moves of pawns are also supported.

(NOTE: The complete rules included with the game contain a board diagram which illustrates examples of the above moves.)

OTHER RULES: Castling, both short and long, are allowed, with the regular restrictions–the king and rook have not yet moved, there is no threat to the castling king, and the space between the king and the rook is clear. You may not desert your king or allow the player after you to check the third player’s king. The game ends when a player has no legal move. In this case the winner is the player who checks him–if both his enemies do, then the player which plays before the mated king is the winner.

[Lemur866]

Three player chess sux. I prefer spherical chess: Mark's Chess Designs - Sphereical Chess

[Kimmy_Gibbler]

The en passant rule is where you get to take your opponent’s pieces because you resent the fact that they might help him, however little, mount an effective defense to your attack, no? Sort of like “hearsay” at trial?

[Dallas_Jones]

@muttrox

This threads really are the gift that keeps on giving. I’m not at all surprised to find that:
I’m sure you are, I’m sure you are…

I gather that nice Dopers pay sometimes for someone else’s subscription. I’d pay $50 or more to get Stoid’s ex- in here.

I’ll split the cost with you. If I knew for sure that these Stoid threads would continue I could cancell my cable TV.

[not_alice]

@ghardester

I’ll split the cost with you. If I knew for sure that these Stoid threads would continue I could cancel my cable TV.

I already did and I am pretty much just lurking

[askeptic]

@Kimmy_Gibbler

The en passant rule is where you get to take your opponent’s pieces because you resent the fact that they might help him, however little, mount an effective defense to your attack, no? Sort of like “hearsay” at trial?

Only if it is a re-match…

[Hamlet]

@niblet_head

I hate you! I hate you!! You destroyed my life!!!

Oh yeah! Well, I never get any time with you, and even if I do, do you greet me at the door wearing Saran Wrap and stiletto heels?! NO! Your in a pink, frilly dress with a warm pie in her hands! WHAT GOOD DOES THAT DO ME?!"

Now go make me some ice …THE RIGHT WAY!!!

[muttrox]

@not_alice

I already did and I am pretty much just lurking

With only a fraction of the effort she’s shown so far, Stoid ought to be able to get herself a reality TV show. Starting next week on Lifetime: Annoyed the Stoid.

Oh, the angles it could take. Lawyers being eliminated. Lawyers struggling to stay awake. The forced negotiations with the ex-. The desperate attempts to sell the house. The court-appointed arbitrator wondering why he didn’t become a butcher like his brother. The endless shots of Stoid fuming at the idiots of the world. The long shot of the walls of her study filled with notes a la A Beautiful Mind. Lawyers trying everything to get eliminated.

The proceeds might get them financially above water.

[Crotalus]

@muttrox

With only a fraction of the effort she’s shown so far, Stoid ought to be able to get herself a reality TV show. Starting next week on Lifetime: Annoyed the Stoid.

Oh, the angles it could take. Lawyers being eliminated. Lawyers struggling to stay awake. The forced negotiations with the ex-. The desperate attempts to sell the house. The court-appointed arbitrator wondering why he didn’t become a butcher like his brother. The endless shots of Stoid fuming at the idiots of the world. The long shot of the walls of her study filled with notes a la A Beautiful Mind. Lawyers trying everything to get eliminated.

The proceeds might get them financially above water.

Heck, if she had put half of the effort she has put into this into anything she knows how to do and is good at, she could probably afford a lawyer and avoid bankruptcy.

[Carol_the_Impaler]

@muttrox

With only a fraction of the effort she’s shown so far, Stoid ought to be able to get herself a reality TV show. Starting next week on Lifetime: Annoyed the Stoid.

Oh, the angles it could take. Lawyers being eliminated. Lawyers struggling to stay awake. The forced negotiations with the ex-. The desperate attempts to sell the house. The court-appointed arbitrator wondering why he didn’t become a butcher like his brother. The endless shots of Stoid fuming at the idiots of the world. The long shot of the walls of her study filled with notes a la A Beautiful Mind. Lawyers trying everything to get eliminated.

The proceeds might get them financially above water.

It’d certainly be more better than Rock of Love.

But then, what isn’t.

[billfish678]

Well,

If lawyers didnt (statistically speaking IMO) :

One, charge an arm and a leg.

Two, act all high and mighty while charging for such advice.

AND

Three, offer any warranty on paid for advice worth a shit besides “Oh well, your still screwed, I guess I was wrong, but here’s the bill anyway”

Then i might be able to muster some sympathy for lawyers being hounded for “free” advice.

till then, not so much

[ivn1188]

Billfish678 steps up to the plate…

A swing and a miss!

[askeptic]

@billfish678

Well,

If lawyers didnt (statistically speaking IMO) :

One, charge an arm and a leg.

Two, act all high and mighty while charging for such advice.

AND

Three, offer any warranty on paid for advice worth a shit besides “Oh well, your still screwed, I guess I was wrong, but here’s the bill anyway”

Then i might be able to muster some sympathy for lawyers being hounded for “free” advice.

till then, not so much

Exactly what kind of warranty did you have in mind there Ace?

Something along the lines of:

I guarantee that even when you lie your ass off and don’t have a legal leg to stand on and refuse to pay me I will still win your meritless case.

that what you had in mind? You’re right we are assholes for not doing that.