# As if job hunting doesn't suck enough; now we have "creative job naming" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 3, 2002, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128 "2002-11-03T19:36:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/1 "2002-11-03T19:36:56Z")
Okay, so Mr. Pug has been out of work for a couple of months. I’m good at job-hunting on the 'net, so I help him out. He’s quite specialized at what he does, so I use a variety of words when searching so that I don’t miss a funkily-named opening. But Judas Priest, what clueless HR idiot could think up some of these titles? Here are some titles and their actual definitions: “Operations Specialist” - receptionist “Master Black Belt” - some kind of biotech technician, I forget “Facilities Coordinator” - file clerk in the facilities department “Laboratory Engineer” - glassware and hamster cage cleaner ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/2 "2002-11-03T19:47:14Z")
FYI, Black Belt is a six sigma quality certification offered by the American Society for Quality – it’s a professional designation. It makes sense that that would appear in the search field. This General Questions interlude has been brought to you by Turtlewax. Wax on, Wax off. ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/3 "2002-11-03T21:43:22Z")
Yeah, but can they break boards with their bare hands? ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/4 "2002-11-03T21:46:24Z")
No, but they can cut the incidence of broken boards by 98.8% and reduce the waste and work-stoppage time when they do break! ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/5 "2002-11-03T21:49:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MEBuckner \* > \*\*Yeah, but can they break boards with their bare hands? \*\* circuit boards, perhaps (but you’d have to take all those pokey little electronic componets out first, - they’d _hurt_ ) as to the OP - the silliest job title I’ve had was “Assistant Manager”. there was no “Manager”. the most incomprehensible was “Residential Specialist”. Currently, I’m shooting for “Queen of the World” ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2002, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/6 "2002-11-03T21:56:38Z")
In the past year, my job title has been changed from Library Assistant, to Public Services Assistant, to Library Services Assistant. By the same HR Administrator. Dumbasses. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/7 "2002-11-04T02:14:25Z")
D’oh! Thanks, **manhattan** , I had this mental image of karate champions being hired to enforce discipline on the assembly lines. But this nebulous naming habit means that not only do I waste time looking at jobs which bear more grandiose names than is necessary, but I may miss jobs which are perfectly suited for Mr. Pug but no one on God’s green earth could guess this. A recent example was “Senior Engineering Specialist”. Now, you would think from looking at this that they wanted an experienced and specialized engineer with a degree, but just by chance I looked at it and they were looking for a biotech facilities CAD designer, exactly what Mr. Pug does. And I almost skipped it over! Aaaaargh! ---
**Author:** ![Jervoise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jervoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jervoise)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/8 "2002-11-04T10:48:12Z")
I once worked at a law firm where the Human Resources manager was called the “People and Development Manager”. I had a hard time not sniggering whenever I had to talk with the bearer of this hideous, pompous, oh-so-post-90s title. She suited the title though, I must admit. I actually laughed aloud when I was introduced to the “Know-How Centre”. I kept my immediate thought (“oh, what happened to your _library_?”) to myself, however. And behold, inside the “Know-How Centre” resided the… “Know-How Tools”! (Or “Know-How Resources”, I forget exactly what the firm had collectively renamed their books, law journals and law reports.) :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/9 "2002-11-04T11:32:11Z")
When I did volunteer work, I reported directly to the “Marketing Dynamo”. I’m not kidding. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/10 "2002-11-04T11:49:17Z")
In my last job, I had the privilege of defining my own title (and job desription, to a large extent) - I changed ‘Stock Auditor’ into ‘Inventory Analyst’ (there had been a broadening of scope in the job description that justified this) - did wonders for my CV. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/11 "2002-11-04T12:40:24Z")
Jack Batty - Information Specialist. I’d tell you what that means in layman’s terms, but I’m not really sure what I do for a living. ---
**Author:** ![Jerrybear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8c91f0/32.png) [@Jerrybear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jerrybear)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/12 "2002-11-04T14:55:51Z")
“Information Specialist” almost sounds like what some people want to call librarians. For example, the department at the University of Michigan where librarians get trained is now known as the School of Information, rather than Library Science. ---
**Author:** ![Neidhart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Neidhart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neidhart)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/13 "2002-11-04T15:41:52Z")
Didn’t this whole mess start when Personnel was renamed Human Resources? And the term “secretary” was superseded by “administrative assistant”? ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/14 "2002-11-04T16:40:02Z")
Darn you manny, I wanted to answer the Black Belt question! (My mom is one and the classes were cool.) ---
**Author:** ![Opengrave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/919ad9/32.png) [@Opengrave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opengrave)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/15 "2002-11-04T16:44:22Z")
Ooh, I’m actually being sent to Green Belt Training soon. Anyone look at the Black Belt salaries? Not too shabby… ---
**Author:** ![Opengrave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/919ad9/32.png) [@Opengrave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opengrave)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/16 "2002-11-04T16:47:46Z")
I have a friend who is a librarian at an elementary school. Her official title is ‘Media Specialist’. Sounds like something you qualify for by watching Monday Night Football or several hours of election coverage. ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2002, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/17 "2002-11-04T17:54:23Z")
JuanitaTech is currently a Technologist. Wait, I’m actually _the_ Technologist for the Baltimore office of the firm for which I work. Don’t even ask… ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2002, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/18 "2002-11-05T00:28:51Z")
A technologist! So, tell me, is it true they take all your money? And what’s Tom Cruise like, really? What? ---
**Author:** ![Wabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wabbit)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2002, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/19 "2002-11-05T01:03:11Z")
My favorite one was Agricultural Paraprofessional, aka ‘Hired Hand’. Of course I made it up for myself when I was working as one but that’s beside the point: it went over quite well with the boss. I got a name tag and everything… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Jervoise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jervoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jervoise)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2002, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/as-if-job-hunting-doesnt-suck-enough-now-we-have-creative-job-naming/135128/20 "2002-11-05T01:43:55Z")
Oh, I forgot about a creative title I once wore. In my student vacation worker days, I spent a couple summers in the fields of a university field station harvesting plants. My other duties included counting the seeds from pods of dried legumes, and picking sheep shit from plant samples. For this ardous work I was awarded the grand title of “Research Technician”.