# AshenLady.... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 7, 2011, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469 "2011-02-07T01:02:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/161 "2011-02-08T03:44:31Z")
Get this though: When someone local found out my wife was raised presbyterian (we’re both non-practicing) she described us as having a ‘mixed’ marriage. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/162 "2011-02-08T03:46:18Z")
> [@Jonathan\_Chance](#): > > Get this though: > > When someone local found out my wife was raised presbyterian (we’re both non-practicing) she described us as having a ‘mixed’ marriage. That doesn’t surprise me at all. Glad you took my last post as sarcastic shenanigans. The Midwest is a weird blend. I live here too. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/163 "2011-02-08T04:01:49Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > You want to move to the Middle East to _get away_ from Muslims? > > You’re not particularly bright, are you? You know what would be awesomely ironic? It would be great if she were to end up living in a constituency represented in the Knesset by one of the Muslim members. Note: I really don’t know how members of the Knesset are chosen, other than that it’s in a democratic election. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/164 "2011-02-08T04:48:18Z")
> [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](#): > > It’s the true doggie-style. As George Carlin said about watching his dog lick himself, “If I could do that, I’d never have to leave the house.”😃 ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/165 "2011-02-08T04:58:02Z")
Well, you can, of course, but you should at least pet him first. Sets the mood. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/166 "2011-02-08T05:49:02Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > … Doesn’t matter whether they are Germans or Pakistanis: they are all damn Arabs. German, Pakistan, Aryan, Arab. Connect the goddamned dot(s), connect the goddamned dot(s), connect the goddamned dot(s)! CMC fnord! [Gar-untied to clean out all those earworms!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSEYGsk6KTM) > [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Uh, that IS an explicit picture! (You know you want to go look too. C’mon! Do it! Do eeeeeettttt!) And damn you for making me go look! Though this was funny, > [@](#): > > **See also** > > ``` > * Autoeroticism > * List of sex positions > * Orgasm control > * Sexercises > * Semen#Semen_ingestion > * *Causes of spinal disc herniation* > * *Sources of Neck pain* > > ``` Yeah, I remember the first time I went to the Doc with neck pain and my usual bad back, “Just to rule out some of the more common causes, were you trying to suck your own dick?” ---
**Author:** ![Capitaine\_Zombie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e95f7d/32.png) [@Capitaine\_Zombie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capitaine_Zombie)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/167 "2011-02-08T06:40:02Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > You all realize that Ashenlady is an obese 40 year old non-Jewish man trolling the board, right? Was she raped at the Ren-Faire twice, by the same guys? ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/168 "2011-02-08T06:54:51Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > It’s possible, the technical term for it is “autofellatio”. I note that the Wikipedia page on the act has an explicit photo of it. Where fuck _me_ takes a whole new meaning. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Damuri\_Ajashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Damuri\_Ajashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damuri_Ajashi)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/169 "2011-02-08T16:50:28Z")
> [@AshenLady](#): > > My mother, rest in peace, said that someday, not in her time, but maybe in mine or her grandchildrens’, what happened in England, France, Spain, Russia and everywhere else on earth, Jews would be tossed out of the USA, just like the rest of the powers in their time. > > I can see this happening. I think there is a better chance of Israel becoming a majority muslimk state than there is of the USA kicking out the JOOOZ. Was your mother a holocaust survivor? I only ask because the only American Jews I knew who believed this was a holocaust survivor. In their view, the spirit of Nazi anti-semitism could arise anytime people were looking for a scapegoat. ---
**Author:** ![Capitaine\_Zombie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e95f7d/32.png) [@Capitaine\_Zombie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capitaine_Zombie)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/170 "2011-02-08T17:15:32Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > It’s possible, the technical term for it is “autofellatio”. I note that the Wikipedia page on the act has an explicit photo of it. Wow, I’m using this as computer background. Thank you Jimmy Wales, is that you doing that thing ? (I hear Jimmy Wales tries to do all the pictures himself to save costs) ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/171 "2011-02-08T17:28:51Z")
Damn my curiosity. :smack: Wait, I mean :o ---
**Author:** ![Capitaine\_Zombie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e95f7d/32.png) [@Capitaine\_Zombie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capitaine_Zombie)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/172 "2011-02-08T19:33:37Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Damn my curiosity. > > :smack: > > Wait, I mean > > :o You got Autofellatio’d. Which is weird. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/173 "2011-02-08T20:35:02Z")
And yet the entry for autocunnilingus is devoid of pictorial depictions. I say, is this fair? Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/174 "2011-02-08T21:20:25Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > You know what would be awesomely ironic? It would be great if she were to end up living in a constituency represented in the Knesset by one of the Muslim members. > > Note: I really don’t know how members of the Knesset are chosen, other than that it’s in a democratic election. Sadly, it _doesn’t_ work that way - the Knesset doesn’t have regional representation, it’s all done on a purely party basis. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/175 "2011-02-08T21:22:26Z")
> [@Mtgman](#): > > And yet the entry for autocunnilingus is devoid of pictorial depictions. I say, is this fair? > > Enjoy, > Steven It’s damn sexist is what it is and it should not be tolerated. Quick someone go upload a picture. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/176 "2011-02-08T21:35:55Z")
> [@Tahssa](#): > > Quick someone go upload a picture. I’d do it, but I’m much too scared to google for pictures first. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/177 "2011-02-08T21:36:45Z")
And then there’s autoanalingus… whew, don’t get me _started_! ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/178 "2011-02-08T21:43:32Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > And then there’s autoanalingus… whew, don’t get me _started_! When it [del]cums[/del] comes to auto analingus I don’t think _any_ of us want to see you “get started”. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/179 "2011-02-08T21:50:35Z")
What can I say. Goatse-guy has set the bar high! ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2011, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469/180 "2011-02-08T21:53:25Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > What can I say. Goatse-guy has set the bar high! I think we’ve all seen enough of that asshole. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469.md?page=10)