# Asian folks on the SDMB **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 21, 2000, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366 "2000-07-21T17:10:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![HomeSlice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/9d8465/32.png) [@HomeSlice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HomeSlice)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/61 "2000-07-26T04:54:21Z")
My mother is Korean, but i really dont look Asian, nor am the least bit attracted to them. Weird eh? ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/62 "2000-07-27T05:20:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by HomeSlice \* > \*\*My mother is Korean, but i really dont look Asian, nor am the least bit attracted to them. Weird eh? \*\* Not really, HomeSlice. I know a lot of mainland Asians who have a preference for things distinctly un-Asian. All it is is that you grew up surrounded by non-Asian things, so you’ve come prefer non-Asian things. My Korean-Japanese cousin, for example, has spent his whole life on the mainland, and he married a blonde and likes country music and (I think) Italian food. Does your mom speak Korean? Do you understand it? If so, you’re more Asian than I am. I don’t know a lick of Japanese, other than the insults. ---
**Author:** ![Mikedog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/53a042/32.png) [@Mikedog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikedog)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/63 "2000-07-27T10:41:15Z")
Hello folks. Mike here, long-time listener, first-time caller. Half Filipino/ half white. Born in Cavite City '67. I was raised in semi-rural Illinois and was occasionally teased for being different. I was so ashamed I used push my eyelids towards my nose to make my eyes more round and less almond shaped. (I never had almond shaped eyes to begin with!). Now, I am proud of who I am and proud of the fact that I wasn’t born in the US. It has given me a greater appreciation for the good life and opportunities we have in America. I’ve also spent 3 years in Peru, and I realize that there are many people around the world who are just surviving. I’m white-washed thru and thru - “Coconut”, I like that - and have no problem with people asking what I am. It reminds me of a great scene from FOX’s “King of the Hill”: Hank Hill is meeting his new neighbor, Khan, for the first time. Hill: So, are you Chinese or Japanese? Khan: I am Laotian! Hill: Uh huh. So, are you Chinese or Japanese? There’s a sizable Filipino population here in St. Louis. During the 1904 World’s Fair here, the was a Filipino tribe (caged?) displayed as an example of how some people in the world were still living as savages. Some STL residents rounded up stray dogs for the tribe to eat. Thems good eatin! Filipinos are pretty cool. We just need more on TV! I demand to see more Filipinos on MTV’s Real World and Road Rules and Big Brother & Ren and Stimpy. Because we can be just as conniving, boring, whiney, sexually-frustrated nerds as they can. Mike the nerd ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/64 "2000-07-27T11:13:28Z")
Mikedog, did you say Ren and Stimpy? Man, I’m your friend already! ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/65 "2000-07-27T12:56:37Z")
> [@](#): > > Not really, HomeSlice. I know a lot of mainland Asians who have a preference for things distinctly un-Asian. All it is is that you grew up surrounded by non-Asian things, so you’ve come prefer non-Asian things. I guess it depends on where you live (where are these Mainland Asians?). As I have said before, here there are LOTS of Asians, and most Asian teens i’ve seen have Asian GFs or BFs (from Monterey to the Bay Area i’ve seen). Hell, if they had a non-Asian BF or GF, that SO had been “assimilated” into the Asian hangout group. At my school diff ethnicities tended to lump together(it wasnt like segregation, there was a whole spectrum, but by and large, there was a black, Vietnamese, etc. group), except for the Filipinos and Koreans who would hang out together (the Vietnamese tended to stay to their own group). That group often had friends who were white, or another ethnicity, or mixed blood (like my twin). I myself am not really attracted to Asian men. Too many i’ve seen look boyish, and i’m not into boyish looking men. Although, i’ve seen a lot of Filipino men who are attractive, but usually they’re too short for my tastes. I’m more into Latino men, personally. ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/66 "2000-07-27T13:17:22Z")
> [@](#): > > Mike here, long-time listener, first-time caller. Half Filipino/ half white. Born in Cavite City '67. > I was raised in semi-rural Illinois and was occasionally teased for being different. I was so ashamed I used push my eyelids towards my nose to make my eyes more round and less almond shaped. (I never had almond shaped eyes to begin with!). Welcome! This is why i’m so glad I was raised here in Monterey, with its diversity. I was never made fun of for being different. In fact i didnt even know I really was different. None of my classmates cared about that stuff. Also, i was glad my parents exposed us to our Filipino side by taking me and my brothers to the Fil-Am club on Christmases and things like that. > [@](#): > > I’m white-washed thru and thru - “Coconut”, I like that - and have no problem with people asking what I am. I would never take offense to the term “coconut”. Why, it’s one of the most useful plants in the tropics. Not something to be ashamed of ;). I also dont mind people asking what I am. It helps educate them, and also, i am proud of my Filipino heritage. I’ve learned that there is so much to be proud of. This page is very cool: [http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/9845/tech.htm](http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/9845/tech.htm) > [@](#): > > Filipinos are pretty cool. We just need more on TV! I demand to see more Filipinos on MTV’s Real World and Road Rules and Big Brother & Ren and Stimpy. Because we can be just as conniving, boring, whiney, sexually-frustrated nerds as they can. I agree with you here. You must admit that it was cool they picked Melissa for the Real World. I saw her audition tape on one of their specials, and she was making fun of her mom like only a young Filipino American can. And yes, we can be all of the above. Hell i’ve seen it in my friends :). ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/67 "2000-07-27T15:49:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Doobieous \* > > I myself am not really attracted to Asian men. Too many i’ve seen look boyish, and i’m not into boyish looking men. Although, i’ve seen a lot of Filipino men who are attractive, but usually they’re too short for my tastes. I’m more into Latino men, personally. ☹ Does that mean this non-Latino boyish-looking guy has no chance? ☹ I saw a commercial last night (I think it was on Comedy Central after “South Park”) with a father in back of the TV trying to get the cable working again, and his daughter sitting in front of it uses the remote to change it to channel 4 - the cable comes back on, Dad yells, “Fixed it!” and the little girl rolls her eyes. Family to me looked Filipino, but I could be wrong. It was nice to at least see a little diversity. Me, I’m a certifiable rice queen (although my tastes run all over the frickin’ rainbow). 😉 Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Baglady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Baglady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baglady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/68 "2000-07-27T16:24:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AudreyK \* > It was the big question when I got to college (I’m 22) at UH. I myself have asked the “local” question more than the “school question”, but that may be because I had no strong sense of school spirit, and I went to a fairly neutral high school (McKinley). The only thing private schooling meant to me was that it usually meant those kids looked down on public-school kids. Ooo McKinley, a townie!! LOL 😉 Actually since my last post on this thread, I have been corrected by some of my friends, who tell me the phrase is **not** “Where you wen’ school?” but in fact “Where you wen’ grad?” oops. Audrey then said: Baglady, I dunno, I could be wrong about the “school” question not being a big deal anymore. To me, and the people I know, it’s not. Maybe not, Audrey. I’ve been away from the islands two years already, plus it’s been a Long Time since high school mattered at all to me. 😃 Of course now my curiosity has been piqued; I’ll have to keep asking. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Baglady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Baglady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baglady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/69 "2000-07-27T16:38:37Z")
“Bagfusciatrist!!” Why does that strike me as so funny?!?!? I like it! Mr. and Mrs. Bagfusciatrist. Heh heh. Can’t guarantee that Mr. Obfus likes it, though. Being a curmudgeon it’s difficult to tell most times. Tatertot, you said: "Question for the mixed people: Have you ever had the experience where a well meaning white person has tried to make you feel guilty about not being more Asian? You know, saying things like “you shouldn’t be ashamed of your culture” and “being Asian is something to be proud of.” Don’t limit it to just mixed-race folks, 'tot. I think a lot of the newer generations get it, too. Many third- and fourth-generation Japanese (both in Hawaii and on the mainland) can’t speak a lick of Japanese, don’t like rice, and have no sense of loyalty to the Land of the Rising Sun. Somehow they still get asked occasionally about speaking the language, etc. A third-generation Scottish bloke wouldn’t get asked about whether he plays a bagpipe, right? I once saw a Phil Donahue show (yeah, it was a while back) where I saw the most racist woman I’d ever seen. She was livid that all these young white folks were dating and marrying black people. Can you imagine??? She said things like, “We must stay with our own kind! You cannot water down our culture and our race through interracial marriage! Your children will be of mixed blood and they will be picked on in school because of the color of their skin!!! WE MUST MAINTAIN OUR RACIAL PURITY!!!” Sound like a white Ku Klux Klan racist? Nope; this woman was black. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/70 "2000-07-27T19:48:02Z")
Townie?! I may have gone to McKinley, but I live in Waipahu!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Baglady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Baglady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baglady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/71 "2000-07-27T20:25:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AudreyK \* > \*\*Townie?! I may have gone to McKinley, but I live in Waipahu!! 😃 > \*\* Awright! A reformed townie!!! LOL!!! Jus’ kidding!!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2000, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/72 "2000-07-27T20:53:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Baglady \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by AudreyK \* > > \*\*Townie?! I may have gone to McKinley, but I live in Waipahu!! 😃 > > \*\* > > Awright! A reformed townie!!! LOL!!! Jus’ kidding!!! 😃 \*\* Oh jeez!! Okay, I grew up in Liliha, and then we moved to Waipahu when I was about 7. I would commute to Kawananakoa Intermediate and McKinley High. I’ve lived here in Waipahu for 16 years. So I’m a pseudo-townie. ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2000, 8:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/73 "2000-07-28T08:40:43Z")
How about the **Obfuscladies** then? 😉 That’s interesting what you said about the 3rd and 4th generations getting it, too. Like I said before I’ve really only been around mixed Asians or Asians married to Americans so I don’t know about a lot of these things. It’s true though, my Dad is English, Scottish and German and nobody has every asked me to make a Yorkshire pudding, play the bagpipes or wear lederhosen. I just do those things cause I like 'em! I’ve always wondered why kids who are mixed white and other minority are automatically assumed to be the darker race. I am proud of my Korean heritage, but frankly I know a lot more about my European roots. If I’d grown up in Korea, the situation would probably be reversed. And why not? > [@](#): > > My mother is Korean, but i really dont look Asian, nor am the least bit attracted to them. Weird eh? Homeslice, that doesn’t sound weird to me. I’m pretty much the same way. I’ve never dated an Asian man, and probably never will, what with being married and all. In fact, my Mother did not want us to marry Asian men, because they are traditionally very chauvanistic. I doubt that the American Asian men are that way (no more so than the average American, that is), but that was her experience growing up. BTW, is your Mother very religious (Christian, that is)? It has been my experience that Korean moms tend to be very God-loving and strict. Also, they get very mad at you if you deliberatly use very big words in a conversation to confuse them. I don’t do that anymore. I fear my little bitty mom tons more than my big ol dad. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2000, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/74 "2000-07-28T10:05:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tatertot \* > **In fact, my Mother did not want us to marry Asian men, because they are traditionally very chauvanistic.** Apparently back when my mom was my age, it was a big and enviable thing to date a Caucasian man. I don’t want to call it a fad, because that doesn’t feel right, but that’s what it seemed to be. It wasn’t hard to see the appeal- all the teen idols were Caucasian, and thus bringing something home other than a boring Japanese man was exciting beyond words. Plus the possibility of having a cute “hapa” child was a big incentive. I personally didn’t get it when she told me about it and I still don’t. I’d say I’m equally attracted to Asians and non-Asians. ---
**Author:** ![tatertot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@tatertot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tatertot)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2000, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/75 "2000-07-28T10:23:23Z")
That’s interesting **Audrey** , I never thought about it that way before. I’d say in my case, I was never really attracted to Asian men because: 1. I didn’t know very many except for my Mother’s friends who were too old to be attractive to me. 2. I was way taller than all of them and when I was a teen I was very self conscious about that. 3. What you said, about most of the teen idols being white or maybe black. Not too many Asians. Personally, I was going to marry George Michael. 🙂 Now about Asian men being chauvanistic, that is my Mother’s point of view, not mine. I take it with a grain of salt, because she much prefers the American way of life. If I had to date again, I’d probably just go out with anyone who asked. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2000, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/76 "2000-07-28T10:39:25Z")
I think in my mother’s case it was done out of rebellion against the steadfastly traditional ways my grandmother tried to impose on her. She preferred American, but gramma didn’t trust the lighter-skinned/lighter-haired men my mom gushed over… My mom also belonged to the generation of Hawaii Asian females who would Scotch-tape their eyelids to get that double-lid (Caucasian) look.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2000, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/77 "2000-07-29T04:14:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > **☹ Does that mean this non-Latino boyish-looking guy has no chance? ☹** All i’m going to say to that is a quote from a favorite R&B singer: “This ain’t a yes, this ain’t a no, just do your thang, we’ll see how it goes” - Aaliyah ;). Anyway, i don’t recall you telling us about your BF, Esprix. Care to tell? ---
**Author:** ![Baglady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Baglady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baglady)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/78 "2000-08-01T03:36:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AudreyK \* > Okay, I grew up in Liliha, and then we moved to Waipahu when I was about 7. I would commute to Kawananakoa Intermediate and McKinley High. I’ve lived here in Waipahu for 16 years. > > So I’m a pseudo-townie. Ahhhh… iss good kine, that. 😃 BTW I found a Hawaii Web page that mentions the “Where you wen’ grad?” question, at [http://alohaworld.com/hi-hs/](http://alohaworld.com/hi-hs/). Aloha mai! ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2000, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366/79 "2000-08-01T04:07:13Z")
Baglady, Thanks for the URL! I’m gonna add it to my site. ummm, I mean: Eh, tanks, ah? I go add 'um to my da kine. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asian-folks-on-the-sdmb/26366.md?page=3)