# Ask a 23 year old virgin anything **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 28, 2015, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707 "2015-06-28T16:20:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/21 "2015-06-28T20:47:00Z")
Do you know how to ride a motorcycle? ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/22 "2015-06-28T20:47:56Z")
> [@Arrendajo](#): > > Your religion forbids you to take alcohol. What it their stance on premarital sex? Not allowed either, but I want to get married. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/23 "2015-06-28T20:50:03Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Do you know how to ride a motorcycle? No but I am currently trying to pass my driving test. I failed twice already. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/24 "2015-06-28T20:54:26Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > How exactly do you simulate confidence? It’s a term that’s thrown around excessively online but thus far I haven’t seen anybody define it accurately. All they give is vague answers. Here, this is specific. > **[10 Ways to Fake Confidence & the 1 Reason Why You Should. | elephant journal](https://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/06/10-ways-to-fake-confidence-the-1-reason-why-you-should/)** > > 10 Ways to Fake Confidence & the 1 Reason Why You Should. It’s by a woman, but it seems appropriate for anyone. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/25 "2015-06-28T20:55:01Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > Have there been a lot of these threads recently? At least three in the past week or so. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/26 "2015-06-28T21:39:30Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > Here, this is specific. > > [http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/06/10-ways-to-fake-confidence-the-1-reason-why-you-should/](http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/06/10-ways-to-fake-confidence-the-1-reason-why-you-should/) > > It’s by a woman, but it seems appropriate for anyone. Nothing I haven’t read before, this is still basic. I dont think it’s possible to fake confidence because people will see right through your act. Real confidence comes from external positive validation while growing up, something which I never received. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/27 "2015-06-28T21:44:59Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > At least three in the past week or so. It’s probably just a coincidence. This thread is authentic if that’s what you’re wondering. ---
**Author:** ![Construct](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/50afbb/32.png) [@Construct](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Construct)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/28 "2015-06-28T21:59:18Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > How exactly do you simulate confidence? It’s a term that’s thrown around excessively online but thus far I haven’t seen anybody define it accurately. All they give is vague answers. Confidence is the belief in the success of your actions. You can signal or simulate confidence via not hedging your actions and taking choices that are unpleasant if you fail. For example, “let’s get drinks” is more confident than “maybe, you know, if you want to, we could get something to drink…?” because it doesn’t include any acknowledgement of a possibility of failure. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/29 "2015-06-28T22:47:52Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > Nothing I haven’t read before, this is still basic. I dont think it’s possible to fake confidence because people will see right through your act. Real confidence comes from external positive validation while growing up, something which I never received. Basic is what you need. It is obviously possible to fake anything–it’s called acting. People will see through your act only if you are a bad actor. There is no risk from trying. What’s the worst that can happen, you are mocked and laughed at? Smiling, standing up straight, etc. is not going to inspire any reasonable person to deride you and if unreasonable people deride you, their opinions are crap anyway. Your opinion of yourself should not come from others. Lots of people liked Hitler in his day, but he still sucked. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/30 "2015-06-28T22:49:19Z")
I recommend an acting class, it may help you become more comfortable with people. Try a community college. ---
**Author:** ![HeXen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@HeXen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeXen)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/31 "2015-06-28T22:54:53Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > I have never dated or even approached a woman. Go… Why ask you? I know a 24 year old virgin whom I work with. I’d ask him but no need as it’s obvious. He’s 420lbs. He’s also Ugly, shy, racist, doesn’t know how to treat women, anti gay, does nothing but sit and play video games, really loves anime way too much, is very lazy, doesn’t know much about the real world, lives at home with parents…any of that sound familiar? ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/32 "2015-06-28T22:59:15Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > I recommend an acting class, it may help you become more comfortable with people. Try a community college. I had to leave university due to unbearable social anxiety and depression. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/33 "2015-06-28T23:00:49Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > I have never dated or even approached a woman. Go… What is your plan for fixing the problem? Not trying to sound critical at all, but just emphasizing the point that Newton’s Laws about physics sort of apply to relationships, too: if you don’t make significant changes, then you are not likely to see significant improvement. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/34 "2015-06-28T23:02:15Z")
> [@HeXen](#): > > Why ask you? I know a 24 year old virgin whom I work with. I’d ask him but no need as it’s obvious. > He’s 420lbs. He’s also Ugly, shy, racist, doesn’t know how to treat women, anti gay, does nothing but sit and play video games, really loves anime way too much, is very lazy, doesn’t know much about the real world, lives at home with parents…any of that sound familiar? Only the last one is familiar. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/35 "2015-06-28T23:02:57Z")
Are you Indian, by any chance? ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/36 "2015-06-28T23:05:04Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > What is your plan for fixing the problem? Not trying to sound critical at all, but just emphasizing the point that Newton’s Laws about physics sort of apply to relationships, too: if you don’t make significant changes, then you are not likely to see significant improvement. I dont really have the means to make significant changes. I am pretty much isolated with zero friends. I only speak to my family and people whom I do work experience with. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/37 "2015-06-28T23:06:16Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Are you Indian, by any chance? No, I’m not indian. ---
**Author:** ![HandsomeGorilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@HandsomeGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HandsomeGorilla)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/38 "2015-06-28T23:09:16Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > **Basic is what you need.** > > It is obviously possible to fake anything–it’s called acting. People will see through your act only if you are a bad actor. > > There is no risk from trying. What’s the worst that can happen, you are mocked and laughed at? Smiling, standing up straight, etc. is not going to inspire any reasonable person to deride you and if unreasonable people deride you, their opinions are crap anyway. > > Your opinion of yourself should not come from others. Lots of people liked Hitler in his day, but he still sucked. Fair enough. I’ve already got walking upright cowered. I’m currently working on natural non-forced eye contact. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/39 "2015-06-28T23:29:35Z")
> [@HandsomeGorilla](#): > > I don’t really have the means to make significant changes. I am pretty much isolated with zero friends. I only speak to my family and people whom I do work experience with. Are there any group activities that you enjoy (soccer, music, watching movies, tennis etc.)? Because that could be a great way to break out of isolation and get socially involved. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2015, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707/40 "2015-06-28T23:32:43Z")
Another question: What advice would you give to another person if they were in your exact same 23-year-old-virgin situation? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-a-23-year-old-virgin-anything/723707.md?page=3)