# Ask Hulk. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 3, 2003, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422 "2003-02-03T02:55:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/61 "2003-02-05T15:14:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*How is it that getting really really mad and really really strong also makes you capable of withstanding direct hits from anti-tank missiles? More powerful muscle tissue isn’t more indestructable, or anything. \*\* HULK IS THE STRONGEST ONE THERE IS! ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/62 "2003-02-05T15:15:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AlbertRose \* > \*\*So **She-Hulk** single? \*\* SHE-HULK NOT CALL, NOT WRITE. HULK THINK SHE-HULK SINGLE BUT HULK NOT SURE. PUNY **ALBERTROSE** MUST TREAT SHE-HULK RIGHT OR HULK SMASH! ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/63 "2003-02-05T15:17:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pucky Schumer \* > \*\*??? \*\* PUNY **RESIPSA** MISSPEAK. HE MEAN HULK TURN GREEN IN SECOND ISSUE. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/64 "2003-02-05T15:18:58Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Pucky Schumer_ > **Hulk, let’s say you had a Mobile Army Surgical Hospital. You know, just like Hawkeye and Radar had.** > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Yong Lee Fampee \* > \*\*Did Bill Bixby have a small penis? \*\* WHY PUNY HUMANS ALWAYS BOTHER HULK? WHY CAN’T THEY JUST LEAVE HULK ALONE? HULK SMASH! ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/65 "2003-02-05T18:21:06Z")
The green Hulk was deaf bodybuilder Lou Ferrigno, Standing 6’5" tall and weighing almost 300 lbs…I see his auntie alot as she comes into the shop I work. Ill be sure to tell her you say Hi, Hulk. So Hulk, why was Bruce Banner’s name was changed to David Banner? ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/66 "2003-02-05T18:21:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cliffy \* > \*\*PUNY **RESIPSA** MISSPEAK. HE MEAN HULK TURN GREEN IN SECOND ISSUE. \*\* What Hulk jealous of? ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/67 "2003-02-05T19:37:31Z")
Whats Captian America _really_ like? Suppose you had to argue in the Supreme Court of the United States during the Florida General Election re-sount mess. Which side would you take and what would your arguement to the court be? ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/68 "2003-02-05T21:32:27Z")
I wrote: > [@](#): > > How is it that getting really really mad and really really strong also makes you capable of withstanding direct hits from anti-tank missiles? More powerful muscle tissue isn’t more indestructable, or anything. For which **Cliffy** graciously channeled the Hulk and answered: > [@](#): > > \*\*HULK IS THE STRONGEST ONE THERE IS! \*\* Nobody is doubting your strongest-one-there-is-ness, Hulk. (Except maybe for the ever-lovin’ Thing, Ben Grimm, but we all know how he likes to exaggerate.) But why does being the **strongest** also mean you’re the **toughest**? How does having enormous bulging biceps reduce the damage you take from an anti-tank rocket? Enquiring minds want to know! ---
**Author:** ![Intaglio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/71e660/32.png) [@Intaglio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intaglio)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/69 "2003-02-05T23:45:31Z")
Hulk, Have you had sex with Jennifer Connelly, How’s the Action, Give Details. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/70 "2003-02-06T01:23:10Z")
Cliffy wrote: > [@](#): > > **PUNY RESIPSA MISSPEAK. HE MEAN HULK TURN GREEN IN SECOND ISSUE.** To which Pucky Schumer replied: > [@](#): > > **What Hulk jealous of?** BAH! PUNY PUCKY MESS UP CLICHÉ! SUPPOSED TO TURN GREEN WITH **ENVY** , NOT JEALOUSY! MISQUOTED CLICHÉS MAKE HULK MAD! HULK SMASH!! ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/71 "2003-02-06T02:10:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > **Nobody is doubting your strongest-one-there-is-ness, Hulk… But why does being the strongest also mean you’re the toughest?** TO REITERATE, HULK IS THE STRONGEST ONE THERE IS! PERHAPS HULK ELABORATE! IN MARVEL COMICS OF SILVER AGE, STRENGTH OFTEN EQUATE WITH BEING TOUGH! SPIDER-MAN STRONG, CAN TAKE MANY PUNCHES FROM PUNY HUMANS, SURVIVE EXPLOSIONS! HULK NOT ABLE TO EXPLAIN MORE – HULK IS NOT EXPERT IN BIOLOGICAL SCIENCE! HULK IS MERELY THE STRONGEST ONE THERE IS! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/72 "2003-02-06T02:26:10Z")
Tell me, Hulk, ol’ boy, did you ever get a chance to shag the Wasp? What’s your real opinion of Stan the Man? ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/73 "2003-02-06T03:02:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cliffy \* > **PERHAPS HULK ELABORATE! IN MARVEL COMICS OF SILVER AGE, STRENGTH OFTEN EQUATE WITH BEING TOUGH! SPIDER-MAN STRONG, CAN TAKE MANY PUNCHES FROM PUNY HUMANS, SURVIVE EXPLOSIONS!** True, O green-skinned one – but after the Silver Age was over, that was no longer the case. Consider **Sunspot** from the New Mutants in the early 1980s: He was at least as strong as Spider-Man, yet while swimming in a river **with** his super-strength turned on, he got knocked out by a piece of driftwood that floated downstream and bumped into the back of his head. Yet even after the Silver Age ended, the Hulk was **still** indestructable. (MAYBE HULK THREATEN TO SMASH WRITERS IF WRITERS TRY TO MAKE HULK LESS TOUGH!) ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/74 "2003-02-06T03:55:09Z")
Hulk: What would you do if you had some valuable item you needed to store in a secret place for future use? ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/75 "2003-02-06T08:53:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*Cliffy wrote: > > To which Pucky Schumer replied: > > BAH! PUNY PUCKY MESS UP CLICHÉ! SUPPOSED TO TURN GREEN WITH **ENVY** , NOT JEALOUSY! MISQUOTED CLICHÉS MAKE HULK MAD! HULK SMASH!! \*\* That’s right! Hulk’s M_A_S\*H! ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/76 "2003-02-06T09:22:37Z")
Has Hulk had sex with Tobey Maguire? Was it good? Is he tight? ---
**Author:** ![Jeff\_Lodoen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b3f665/32.png) [@Jeff\_Lodoen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeff_Lodoen)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/77 "2003-02-06T11:35:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*True, O green-skinned one – but after the Silver Age was over, that was no longer the case. Consider **Sunspot** from the New Mutants in the early 1980s: He was at least as strong as Spider-Man, yet while swimming in a river **with** his super-strength turned on, he got knocked out by a piece of driftwood that floated downstream and bumped into the back of his head. > > Yet even after the Silver Age ended, the Hulk was **still** indestructable. (MAYBE HULK THREATEN TO SMASH WRITERS IF WRITERS TRY TO MAKE HULK LESS TOUGH!) \*\* I dunno, Spidey got knocked out plenty of times. I think the only major character depowered after the silver age was Superman, and he needed it. I can’t really think of a depowered major Marvel character. Lots of temporary changes. I guess mutants get more power with maturity. Handbooks say he’s very resistant to injury, -190 to 3000 degree temperatures and artillery shells are mentioned as survivable. But in this 1986 entry it says he would not survive a near-miss nuke… Perhaps a “gamma bomb” is something different. The hulk gains 900 pounds of “extra-dimensional” mass. He must have a denser hide than Asgardians and they do OK. Beyond that the hulk has a healing ability. Wolverine sliced him open in his grey days, no biggie. On a green day I don’t think he can be cut. It’s funny books, man! Hulk is as Hulk does! Hulk like beans? ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/78 "2003-02-06T16:19:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zebra \* > \*\*Suppose you had to argue in the Supreme Court of the United States during the Florida General Election re-sount mess. Which side would you take and what would your arguement to the court be? \*\* HULK NOT THOUGHT ABOUT IT VERY SERIOUSLY BUT HULK THINK HULK WOULD ARGUE ELECTOR IS OFFICER OF STATE, NOT FEDERAL SOVEREIGN AND THAT WITHIN BROAD LIMITS IT IS RESPONSIBILITY OF STATE TO CHOOSE ELECTOR UNDER APPLICABLE STATE LAW AS ILLUMINATED BY STATE LEGISLATURE AND SUPREME COURT! EITHER THATM OR HULK SMASH! ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/79 "2003-02-06T16:20:33Z")
PUNY HUMANS ASK IF HULK HAVE SEX WITH PEOPLE! HULK LOVE BETTY! WHY CAN’T PUNY HUMANS LEAVE HULK ALONE! HULK SMASH! ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422/80 "2003-02-06T16:24:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jeff Lodoen \* > **Hulk like beans?** HULK THINK PERHAPS PUNY **JEFF LODOEN** LURK AT MICAH WRIGHT FORUM! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-hulk/152422.md?page=5)