# Ask Superdude!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [September 26, 2001, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921 "2001-09-26T15:21:28Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/1 "2001-09-26T15:21:28Z")
Since everyone else is doing it, I wanted to start an “Ask the…” thread. But I’m not anything extraordinary. So I hereby present:
Ask **Superdude**!
[sub]fanfare[/sub]
That’s right! Step right up and ask anything about **Superdude** that you have always wanted to know. His life is an open book! No question shall go withou an answer! Fire away…
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/2 "2001-09-26T15:22:52Z")
What is the airspeed velocity of a Monica swallow?
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### Author:  [@pezpunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pezpunk)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/3 "2001-09-26T15:25:21Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by lieu \*
> \*\*What is the airspeed velocity of a Monica swallow? \*\*
Swallow? I thought she spit.
😃
okay, bye
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/4 "2001-09-26T15:28:39Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by lieu \*
> \*\*What is the airspeed velocity of a Monica swallow? \*\*
[sub]If you went back and actually READ the OP, you’d wonder how this relates, but I’ll answer it anyway[/sub] 🙂
4
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### Author:  [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/5 "2001-09-26T15:29:48Z")
Hmmm…this is a good idea. I should have thought about this for myself. That way you guys would really know who am and see if you really want me. I may be a revolting slob and you don’t know it. (I’m not, but it was just an example.)
**SD** , what do you do during the day?
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### Author:  [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/6 "2001-09-26T15:32:13Z")
Superdude, do you miss the roomy expanse of the phonebooths of yesteryear? Relatedly, do you find yourself wearing more slip-on shoes than lace-up shoes, in order to better facilitate the changing and the decostuming (glavin!)?
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### Author:  [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/7 "2001-09-26T15:42:18Z")
How big is the backseat of your car?
_blush_
I should really stop.
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/8 "2001-09-26T15:42:30Z")
**dlgirl** , I do very little during the day. I’m a comic. Sometimes during the day I will do corporate shows designed for stress-relief and improving employee morale. That’s how I make my living. Either on stage or facing giant corporations [sub]WARNING! Corporations may not actually be giant[/sub] and making people laugh.
**Munch** , a very good question. And one that I’d have to answer a resounding “yes” to. I miss those old phone booths. However, the sector of the planet that I’ve been assigned to protect still has several around. Shoes-wise, I’m torn. I prefer the slip-on variety, but many battles over the years have taken their toll on the Superknees and Superankles. Therefore, I tend to wear hiking boots.
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/9 "2001-09-26T15:44:56Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Medea’s Child \*
> \*\*How big is the backseat of your car?
>
> \*\*
Actually, I’ve had the backseat of my car removed. It’s now big enough for two people (or four, if two piles are stacked vertically) to lay comfortably.
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### Author:  [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/10 "2001-09-26T15:45:29Z")
Who would you sacrifice yourself for without pausing to think about it?
Other than your own whose opinion do you value most?
Did/do you know your father well as an adult? Was he a good dad? What could he have done better?
What are you better at than almost anyone else you know?
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### Author:  [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/11 "2001-09-26T16:12:00Z")
Do you know where your towel is?
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/12 "2001-09-26T16:12:59Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by astro \*
> **Who would you sacrifice yourself for without pausing to think about it?**
Honestly? Good question, **astro**. I guess I’d have to say Stacey. Girl I lost my virginity to. We dated for almost three years. But she’s dead, so that may make my answer immaterial.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
>
> Other than your own whose opinion do you value most?
> \*\*
Toss-up. Depends on what point-of-view I need. Either Amanda or Jason.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> Did/do you know your father well as an adult? Was he a good dad? What could he have done better?
> \*\*
My dad died this past January. He and my mother divorced about 17 years ago. I didn’t know him as well as I should have. I harbored a lot of resentment towards him. I was always the emotional one out of the three kids, and the divorce hit me the hardest. In retrospect, I respect him as a father. He did the best that he could do, and only what he thought was right, even if it was wrong, if that makes sense. The last year or so before he died we tried to connect on a more personal level. I can’t hold anything against him. I can’t say that I wouldn’t have done the same things that he did.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> What are you better at than almost anyone else you know? \*\*
Talking my way into jams without being able to talk my way out of them.
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/13 "2001-09-26T16:14:09Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Munch \*
> \*\*Do you know where your towel is? \*\*
Most are in my linen closet (yes, I have one). There’s one on the bathroom floor, one in the towel rack, and three(?) in the laundry hamper.
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### Author:  [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/14 "2001-09-26T16:18:03Z")
Did you have stage fright the first time you performed (your comedy, I mean, not the _other_ kind of perform, although if you wish to answer that one as well, go ahead)? If so, how did you overcome it?
Ever been heckled and had the heckler hit too close to home? What then?
And… because someone has to ask: Boxers or briefs?
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/15 "2001-09-26T16:47:48Z")
In order, **LifeOnWry** :
1. Yes. Actually, I have an anxiety disorder, so I get nervous every time I perform (stand-up _and_ the other kind). I take Paxil now to help control it. The first time, though, I had to improvise. I stammered out my first joke, which fell flat. I then told the audience that I figured it was better to get the crappy joke out of the way at the beginning, so that I could tell my good ones now. Explained that I knew there was one bad joke, but I couldn’t decide where to put it. Just played it off. After that, they seemed to be a little more on my side.
2a) Yes. Hecklers can be the lifeblood of a set that’s not going over too well. I was in Kansas City, MO, at a club called the Lighten Up theater when I had my set that was just falling flat. I was having an off night, no energy, and it was showing. I couldn’t get the crowd. Someone who’d drank a little too much thought he’d be funny by saying “Freebird!” I started cutting a few good-natured jabs at him, and the crowd started going along. Laughter’s contagious.
2b) Nope. Never had anyone hit too close to home. Then again, my life’s an open book, so I’ll talk about anything.
1. Boxers.
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### Author:  [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/16 "2001-09-26T17:00:12Z")
Do you think it’s better to vacation in Guyana, Guinea, or Ghana?
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/17 "2001-09-26T18:04:40Z")
Glad you asked, **Cranky** as I have spent absolutely _NO_ time in any of the three. Therefore, I would have to say Guinea. But only because they breed their swine in bite-size nuggents.
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/18 "2001-09-26T18:06:53Z")
Do you get people saying: “You’re a comic?? Say something funny!” How do you deal with that?
Were you comical as a kid?
What color are your eyes?
Were you the one at that place that one time? Not _that_ place… the other one…
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### Author:  [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/19 "2001-09-26T18:15:30Z")
How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop?
Wiping: front to back or back to front?
And, perhaps most importantly, what **is** Goofy?
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2001, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-superdude/83921/20 "2001-09-26T18:20:58Z")
**FCM** , yes I do get people saying that. What I normally tell them is “no. Not unless you’re going to pay me for it.” Just like the last thing a mechanic wants to do on his off-time is fix his car, I hate being ORDERED to say something funny. Normally I try to be as unfunny as possible when someone says that.
My eyes? Blue. Paul Newman/John Travolta blue.
Comical as a kid? Not really. I was the middle child, which meant that I was always vying for familial attention. Not that I got it. I didn’t discover my sense of humor in any practical way until my stint as a high scholl disc jockey.
Nope. That wasn’t me.
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