# "Ask the \_\_\_\_\_" threads I hope to never see **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 20, 2002, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049 "2002-12-20T16:53:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/21 "2002-12-20T19:01:59Z")
Ask the Gnome that Lives in my Pants Ask the Voices in my Head Ask yo’ Momma Ask the Guy who Hates You Ask Lucky from “Waiting for Godot” Ask and Ye Shall Receive Ask My Balls Ask the Guy who Likes to Drink Water Aks the Uneducated Person [Askee-pee-pee](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=133699&highlight=oskee) Ask the Guy who’s Stalking You Ask a Cro-Magnon Ask Not what your Country can Do for You, but what You can Do for your Country ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/22 "2002-12-20T19:06:12Z")
Ask the girl who is really really long winded and whose return key doesn’t work and who eschews most punctuation. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/23 "2002-12-20T19:09:41Z")
Actually, “Ask Yo’ Mama” could potentially be pretty funny if you did it right. ---
**Author:** ![airdisc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e19adc/32.png) [@airdisc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/airdisc)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/24 "2002-12-20T19:13:04Z")
Ask This! ---
**Author:** ![Witch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Witch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Witch)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/25 "2002-12-20T19:36:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jehovah68 \* > \*\*Ask the turdburglar. \*\* Now I’d _read_ that one. ---
**Author:** ![Happyjoelucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Happyjoelucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happyjoelucky)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/26 "2002-12-20T19:47:27Z")
I see everyone has a question for me. Fire away. ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/27 "2002-12-20T19:50:23Z")
ASK THE GUY WHO ALWAYS TYPES IN CAP’S AND OVERUSES APOSTROPHE’S ---
**Author:** ![Wartime\_Consigliori](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9d8465/32.png) [@Wartime\_Consigliori](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wartime_Consigliori)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/28 "2002-12-20T20:05:51Z")
Ask Sherwin Williams ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/29 "2002-12-20T20:17:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wartime Consigliori \* > \*\*Ask Sherwin Williams \*\* 😃 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/30 "2002-12-20T20:19:32Z")
Ask Cecil. My _GOD_, can you imagine how long that page would take to load? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/31 "2002-12-20T20:37:41Z")
Ask The Person Who, When You Ask Them What Time It Is, Starts By Telling You How To Build A Clock… Ask Bill Clinton What The Definition Of “Is” Is (a very long thread). ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/32 "2002-12-20T20:42:20Z")
Ask bj0rn _anything_. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/33 "2002-12-20T21:47:28Z")
Ask the Knights who say Ni Ask Justhink about women Cheers, Keithy ---
**Author:** ![Bullwinkle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@Bullwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/34 "2002-12-20T22:02:50Z")
a k the guy who can’t type the letter " ". ---
**Author:** ![Jake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/35 "2002-12-20T22:10:39Z")
Witch, Me too! I’d love to know what a turdburglar really is. (Do you really think sombody steals those things? Wonder how much they get for them!) 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/36 "2002-12-20T22:33:35Z")
Asktheguywhosespacebardoesntworkandhedoesntusepunctuation. Conversely, Ä$k thë Mët@LhÆD ©yBëR l33t Tripler Becauseyouknowyouhavequestions. ---
**Author:** ![SpasticKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@SpasticKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpasticKitty)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/37 "2002-12-20T22:41:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lost4life \* > \*\* > > Who else saw the thread title and immediately thought of Proctologist? \*\* Hee hee, I did! 😃 That, and Ask the Sperm Bank Teller. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/38 "2002-12-20T23:40:31Z")
I’d actually read most of **cuauhtemoc’s** … Ask the guy/gal with an untreated case of Syphilis Ask the guy who likes boobs Ask the uptight Conservative Ask the gal who shaves her privates Ask the belligerent Liberal Ask the Clown Ask the uptight belligerent politician who is drunk _right now_ Ask the gal who is afraid of bridges ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/39 "2002-12-21T00:32:35Z")
Ask the short-order cook with eczema, rampant alopecia, and uncontrollable fits of sneezing. Ask any mermaid you happen to see… ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/40 "2002-12-21T01:01:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dwc1970 \* > \*\* > Ask the Undertaker > \*\* Actually, I’d have LOTS of questions for him, like how is his wife, and what’s he think of Hulk Hogan, and…oh wait,you meant the other guy. :smack: 😃 Ask the Porn Star. Ask the guy with Tourettes (and yes, I’m aware it only works when their talking. I just think it would eventually have to be moved to the Pit based on language). Ask the Guy with a One Second Attention Span. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049.md?page=3)