# "Ask the \_\_\_\_\_" threads I hope to never see **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 20, 2002, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049 "2002-12-20T16:53:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Protesilaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Protesilaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Protesilaus)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/61 "2002-12-21T20:19:42Z")
Ask the Guy Who Misinterprets Everything You Say Ask a Pokemon ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/62 "2002-12-21T21:26:57Z")
Ask me. Ask the guy that doesn’t wear underwear. (conversely, I wouldn’t mind seeing ask the girl version of this 😃 ) Ask a guy that avoids questions. Ask the professional scam artist. Ask the Gener neutral entity. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/63 "2002-12-21T21:31:20Z")
Ask the Trainspotter. Ask the Macintosh Evangelist. Ask the Grand Wizard. Å$k Th3 37337 h4xÕr Ðõöð!!! Ask Your Local Cable Operator. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2002, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/64 "2002-12-21T21:33:09Z")
Ask the drunken sailor staggering out of a bar at 3 a.m. Ask the bank robber Ask the town bore Ask your ex-wife’s lawyer Ask the snotty kid who swiped your newspaper yesterday Ask the straggler in the INS office Ask the traffic cop who just gave you a ticket Ask your roommate in a prison Ask your spouse, when _you_ have just come home from a bar at 3 a.m. Ask dougie\_monty about movies 😃 Ask these people: Steven Hawking about religion Bin Laden about peace and tolerance Trent Lott about discretion Bobby Knight about fair play Bill Gates about bowling ---
**Author:** ![ataraxy22](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ataraxy22/32/307_2.png) [@ataraxy22](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ataraxy22)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/65 "2002-12-22T00:02:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dougie\_monty \* > \*\* > Ask the snotty kid who swiped your newspaper yesterday > \*\* Hey, I like that one. Some snot-wit stole my newspaper before I got to it today! ---
**Author:** ![airdisc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e19adc/32.png) [@airdisc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/airdisc)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/66 "2002-12-22T00:42:25Z")
\Ask\ the \\guy\\ who doesn’t know that you \can’t\ use HTML on the \SDMB\. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/67 "2002-12-22T04:05:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TigoleBitties \* > \*\*Ask the man who waters his lawn daily even though its raining and has a secret fetish to investigate UFO conspiracies and the correlation between nude muggings, soggy cornflake times, and the unbelievable way Liberace was considerted hetero…[edit]…flooding into city drainage as he finally realizes that he has come full circle and cannot stop. \*\* Holy crap – I actually had this guy for a cab driver once in Reno! (Actual quote: “You know, people think trees are so great because they make oxygen, but what they don’t know is that they _steal it back at night!!!_”) ---
**Author:** ![Sdrawkcab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/22d042/32.png) [@Sdrawkcab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sdrawkcab)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/68 "2002-12-22T05:17:18Z")
**Ask the President of the United States** (he should have better things to do…) ---
**Author:** ![reprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/69 "2002-12-22T05:24:38Z")
Ask Jack Dean Tyler. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/70 "2002-12-22T12:55:44Z")
Ask the man with a rabid badger in his pants Ask the furry ---
**Author:** ![effac3d](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@effac3d](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/effac3d)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/71 "2002-12-22T13:24:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\*There was actually a sort of “ask the pedophile” thread in … IMHO? a while back (six months or so, maybe). It got deleted before it got too long, though from what I’ve heard the guy seemed to be legit:( > > Ask Mark Serlin > > Ask the guy you can smell through your computer \*\* Why deleted? Seems like it could have been educational,in a abnormal psychology sort of way. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/72 "2002-12-22T16:18:56Z")
Ask your future self. Ask the Ghost of Christmas Past. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/73 "2002-12-23T01:39:29Z")
Ask the Man With Itchy Balls Ask the Woman With PMS Ask The Person Who Just Picked Their Nose ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/74 "2002-12-23T01:51:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cuauhtemoc \* > \*\*Don’t Ask the Man from Opposite Land. \*\* We just call it downunder. ---
**Author:** ![broccoli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@broccoli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/broccoli)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/75 "2002-12-23T18:52:44Z")
Ask the bassist from Motley Crue. Ask the cop-who-just-quit-smoking-and-is-going-through-a-divorce. Ask a pimp. Ask Clinton. Oh wait, thats the same thing. Ask “the gimp”. Ask my mother. Ask Vanilla Ice. Ask the dude who invented aerosol cheese spray. Ask the drunk redneck. Ask 1,000 monkeys locked in a room with typewriters. Ask A boy named Sue. ---
**Author:** ![Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knighted_Vorpal_Sword)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/76 "2002-12-23T19:12:24Z")
Ask Monica Lewinsky’s dry cleaner Ask Michael Jackson’s plastic surgeon Ask the corpse ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/77 "2002-12-23T19:35:52Z")
Ask the Insurance Salesman regarding a change in your coverage. Ask your doctor or pharmacist. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2002, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049/78 "2002-12-23T19:37:09Z")
Ask the double poster. Regards, Shodan [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-_____-threads-i-hope-to-never-see/144049.md?page=3)