# Ask the Aspie Teenage Girl **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 7, 2013, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314 "2013-11-07T06:25:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Garula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@Garula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garula)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/61 "2013-11-11T14:07:28Z")
I’m a little late here, but I’ve had a question on my mind recently and this seems like an extremely fitting place to ask. As mentioned up thread, one of the common symptoms of Asperger’s and conditions on the spectrum is difficulty recognizing social and emotional cues, particularly facial ones. At least, as I understand it, please correct me if I’m misunderstanding. One of the typical characteristics of anime and manga (and other Japanese performance in general) is very exaggerated emotions. Characters don’t express surprise just by widening their eyes, they suddenly fall to the ground. Tears become torrents of liquid rather than just a few drops. An angry character looks more demon than human. There is generally not a lot of deviation from these methods from one series to another. Even sound effects are extremely standardized (i.e. “dokidoki” pretty much always means the character is nervous). Would these practices make character emotions more easily understood to someone with an autism spectrum disorder? Would such a person have an easier time understanding and relating to an anime or manga character than a character from another medium? Good luck with the Japanese, **Purin血**! I wish I had started at a younger age. I’ve been in Tokyo for years now and my ability is still crap. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/62 "2013-11-11T15:37:56Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > Oh that’s right, Ramune. The bottles are neat so my daughter always wants to save them too but I don’t know what to do with them! Stack 'em wide and tall on the back of her headboard apparently! > [@Lucky\_13](#): > > I can’t speak to how others get tested, personally. I can say that for me, I had a sort of interview and a written test that came in sections, measuring my level of anxiety in social situations, and asking whether or not I disagreed with various statements such as “I have trouble looking people in the eye” and “I always know the right thing to say at social gatherings,” for example. The psychologist did say later that I didn’t seem to have much trouble conversing with him. It’s just that I have trained myself, over the years, to seem less awkward, and to not blurt out whatever’s on my mind, but it’s still a struggle for me sometimes. Right, she was perhaps a bit to young to remember all the details, as well as very overwhelmed with everything that was reigning down on her, as a ton of change was being thrust upon her at the time (change and coping mechanisms is another thing that doesn’t fly very easily, in her case at least, but she’s improved tremendously since therapy). It was an entire battery of questions over a few sessions ending with an hour, maybe hour and a half of a written exam to see how she scores against a particular normalized benchmark against other children her age by a wonderful psychologist. It was pretty convincing and conclusive that she was indeed well within the range that, at the time I suppose was labels as Asperger’s. Low ability to recognize social cues, dealing with such curve balls when other kids notice her reactions were’t “normal”, or sarcasm, etc. The test also revealed a few traits she scored shockingly well on. The highest was something the doctor described as [hyperlexia.](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperlexia) When he pointed out the related score/graph on that as compared to the benchmark, it was almost off the charts. Though her mother and I can’t say we were surprised as it was painfully obvious by the age of two her grasp of words and language were far above normal. That she’s wanting to now get into teaching a second language and learning so quickly and ad fluently is both astounding to myself and her mother and even her sensei. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/63 "2013-11-11T16:09:04Z")
My daughter’s diagnosis also involved lots of exclusionary tests - hearing, sight, dyslexia, etc. Also, it was many repeated questions over a series of time, assessments while watching her play, investigations with language therapists, questions to me about her earlier years, and reports from her doctor, teachers and TAs. It took years! But I’m sure an adult diagnosis would be quicker. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/64 "2013-11-11T17:16:42Z")
Pretty cool thread. Not that you need an internet stranger’s approval, but you’re the first out teenager on the dope who I haven’t wanted to smack some sense into. 😛 > [@Purin](#): > > Why Aspies may seem to like japanese culture? Well, I know for a fact that some use the computer a lot, like me. If I hadn’t become attached to the internet, there is no chance I would be into Japanese culture as much as I am today. To many, a different culture is new, exciting, and simply fascinating. I was friends with a lot of people in college who had this same mindset. Can you explain, as it pertains to you: why Japan? Why not China, or the Philippines, or Russia, or Latvia, or India (etc)? And I’m not asking you to speak for everybody. However, since it seems like you’re closer to the anime/Asia-worship subculture than most of us, could you perhaps hypothesize why, of all the foreign cultures that could fascinate one, Japan is so \*overwhelmingly \*popular? ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/65 "2013-11-11T17:46:19Z")
> [@Rachellelogram](#): > > And I’m not asking you to speak for everybody. However, since it seems like you’re closer to the anime/Asia-worship subculture than most of us, could you perhaps hypothesize why, of all the foreign cultures that could fascinate one, Japan is so \*overwhelmingly \*popular? They have so much quirky, fun stuff that’s just ripe for the picking. It’s a wealthy, high-tech country with a lot of toys, and most countries have more pressing things to devote a lot of resources to than robot Hello Kitties or whatever. Obviously the average Japanese person’s life does not consist of anime and Hello Kitty, but if you’re just looking for cute, silly things, there is a lot of it to be found. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/66 "2013-11-11T18:25:54Z")
> [@Rachellelogram](#): > > …but you could you perhaps hypothesize why, of all the foreign cultures that could fascinate one, Japan is so \*overwhelmingly \*popular? > [@Blackberry](#): > > They have so much quirky, fun stuff that’s just ripe for the picking. It’s a wealthy, high-tech country with a lot of toys, and most countries have more pressing things to devote a lot of resources to than robot Hello Kitties or whatever. Obviously the average Japanese person’s life does not consist of anime and Hello Kitty, but if you’re just looking for cute, silly things, there is a lot of it to be found. I have a theory that Japan is, psychologically, the “most different country” compared to the West. Strangely, I don’t get that feeling about China at all; to me, China feels like it could be in the suburbs of Toronto. Perhaps this is because there has been a thread of Chinese culture in Canada since the late nineteenth century. But Japan? It threw off Western Christian influence in the 1600s and never let it back in to power. In some ways, it could be considered the most powerful Pagan nation. It had time to being its own arts to fruition during the period of isolation up until the mid-1800s, and then it reached out and chose the elements of the West that it wanted, rather than being run over as China was in the 1800s. For a long time, Japan has been powerful enough to maintain that cultural difference. ---
**Author:** ![Purin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Purin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purin)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/67 "2013-11-11T19:26:33Z")
> [@Rachellelogram](#): > > Pretty cool thread. Not that you need an internet stranger’s approval, but you’re the first out teenager on the dope who I haven’t wanted to smack some sense into. 😛 > > I was friends with a lot of people in college who had this same mindset. Can you explain, as it pertains to you: why Japan? Why not China, or the Philippines, or Russia, or Latvia, or India (etc)? > > And I’m not asking you to speak for everybody. However, since it seems like you’re closer to the anime/Asia-worship subculture than most of us, could you perhaps hypothesize why, of all the foreign cultures that could fascinate one, Japan is so \*overwhelmingly \*popular? …Well, phew! That’s good! Haha! Japanese culture is _booming_ in the USA right now. The comments people have responded to this are correct. Personally, the USA is boring compared to all the quirky, fun media and merchandise Japan makes. Their authentic food is also amazing, and my mouth waters every time I see a Japanese dish. However, about their culture specifically, I also find that over time, the USA’s population has gotten so disrespectful and rude, and I hate that. In Japan, respect and family is _everything_. With approx. 129,000,000 people living in a country roughly the size of California, you’d expect a lot of uproar and rioting. And sometimes, there are. But they mostly stay at peace with each other, and if that isn’t respectful and showing of a wonderful country, I don’t know what is. Another thing is their writing. It’s gorgeous! Even how they pronounce their words is beautiful. It’s captivated me, more than any other language. This is why i’m just so passionate about Japan! However, Japanese is not the only language I want to learn, nor is Japan the only country I love! I have three languages I want to learn. Japanese, Korean, and Russian. Korea, even in the downfall it’s citizens are in right now, is a beautiful country, and has a beautiful language. Russian has always piqued my interest, and their alphabet is amazing! I love how it sounds too! So, i’m not solely interested in Japan, it’s my favorite country, yes. But I love most other countries too! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Purin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Purin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purin)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/68 "2013-11-11T20:05:04Z")
> [@Garula](#): > > I’m a little late here, but I’ve had a question on my mind recently and this seems like an extremely fitting place to ask. > > As mentioned up thread, one of the common symptoms of Asperger’s and conditions on the spectrum is difficulty recognizing social and emotional cues, particularly facial ones. At least, as I understand it, please correct me if I’m misunderstanding. > > One of the typical characteristics of anime and manga (and other Japanese performance in general) is very exaggerated emotions. Characters don’t express surprise just by widening their eyes, they suddenly fall to the ground. Tears become torrents of liquid rather than just a few drops. An angry character looks more demon than human. There is generally not a lot of deviation from these methods from one series to another. Even sound effects are extremely standardized (i.e. “dokidoki” pretty much always means the character is nervous). > > Would these practices make character emotions more easily understood to someone with an autism spectrum disorder? Would such a person have an easier time understanding and relating to an anime or manga character than a character from another medium? > Good luck with the Japanese, **Purin血**! I wish I had started at a younger age. I’ve been in Tokyo for years now and my ability is still crap. No, you haven’t misunderstood at all. It doesn’t affect all Aspies, but for me, it certainly does… or rather, did. I have improved greatly. Anime and other things like that, does come across as easier to understand for me, of course. With the exaggerated emotions, I could easily recognize what the character felt. (Just as a little tip for next time, “Dokidoki” is an onamonapia for a beating heart. Whenever some person sees the love of their life, or something gets intense, that’s when “Dokidoki” should be used. Feelings of nervousness can use “Dokidoki”, but it is usually reserved for more intense moments. :D) Thanks for the encouragement! Good luck to you too. Tokyo isn’t the most beautiful or peaceful part of Japan, but I hope you still manage to have fun! ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/69 "2013-11-11T20:19:58Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > Oh that’s right, Ramune. The bottles are neat so my daughter always wants to save them too but I don’t know what to do with them! Do Aspergers have a tendancy to hoard? > [@Rachellelogram](#): > > Pretty cool thread. Not that you need an internet stranger’s approval, but you’re the first out teenager on the dope who I haven’t wanted to smack some sense into. 😛 I never remember people’s names/handles, but we had a couple of quite impressive teenagers over the years. One of them posted for many years, joining I believe when he was about 14 and still posting when he went to college (he might even be still posting for all I know). ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/70 "2013-11-11T21:29:48Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Do Aspergers have a tendancy to hoard? I don’t know. Not that I’ve ever heard of. My daughter doesn’t have it though, but she is obsessed with anime and stuff and she has a very one-track mind. She’s pretty much an encyclopedia of knowledge about things she’s interested in. Her doctor did actually consider Asperger’s briefly too because she becomes overstimulated and overwhelmed \*very \*easily, but it was quickly ruled out. She does well socially, but she’s a weirdo. I could see someone like her being vastly less popular than she is, but I think she’s just cute and “sparkly” (my dad’s description) enough to pull it off. Typically, getting overwhelmed and hiding under your desk in middle school would not be well-received 😕 (she doesn’t do that now in 8th grade, but she did in 6th grade). ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/71 "2013-11-11T22:08:19Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Do Aspergers have a tendancy to hoard? Not necessarily. Hoarding seems more related to OCD type disorders. As a parent to an Aspie, for lack of a better term, there might be more of a tendency to collect, rather than hoard. Collection and organization seem to be pleasing and intriguing… Things that are ordered in an aesthetic way. Which, coming full circle, is why even I, myself, is in love with Japan’s culture (though the more traditional over pop); they have an intrinsic beauty in almost everything they do. My daughter would spend more time arranging her markers and crayons in a spectrum rather than drawing with them when she was little. Hoarders, on the other hand, can’t part with their stuff in a profound way. And most of their “collection” seems random and an unhealthy connection to practically worthless things they perceive as valuable. To part with it is separation anxiety to the point of terrifying. That said, I do think some Aspies can be prone to clutter as their manny passions can absorb them fully, and not be conscientious enough to straighten things up over time. Though some might be super fastidious. But that seems more a normal trait that’s merely exasperated by the disorder, IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Purin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Purin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purin)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2013, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/72 "2013-11-11T22:53:57Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > Not necessarily. Hoarding seems more related to OCD type disorders. > > As a parent to an Aspie, for lack of a better term, there might be more of a tendency to collect, rather than hoard. Collection and organization seem to be pleasing and intriguing… Things that are ordered in an aesthetic way. Which, coming full circle, is why even I, myself, is in love with Japan’s culture (though the more traditional over pop); they have an intrinsic beauty in almost everything they do. My daughter would spend more time arranging her markers and crayons in a spectrum rather than drawing with them when she was little. > > Hoarders, on the other hand, can’t part with their stuff in a profound way. And most of their “collection” seems random and an unhealthy connection to practically worthless things they perceive as valuable. To part with it is separation anxiety to the point of terrifying. > > That said, I do think some Aspies can be prone to clutter as their manny passions can absorb them fully, and not be conscientious enough to straighten things up over time. Though some might be super fastidious. But that seems more a normal trait that’s merely exasperated by the disorder, IMHO. Yeah, but I tend to leave things messy. When I organize things, it’s usually stuff I care about. Everything else is all cluttered. Like my room right now, haha! ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2013, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/73 "2013-11-12T00:44:18Z")
I wasn’t calling you messy. But yeh, you’re totally messy. Clean your room! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Garula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@Garula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garula)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2013, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/74 "2013-11-12T09:06:43Z")
> [@Purin](#): > > No, you haven’t misunderstood at all. It doesn’t affect all Aspies, but for me, it certainly does… or rather, did. I have improved greatly. > > Anime and other things like that, does come across as easier to understand for me, of course. With the exaggerated emotions, I could easily recognize what the character felt. > (Just as a little tip for next time, “Dokidoki” is an onamonapia for a beating heart. Whenever some person sees the love of their life, or something gets intense, that’s when “Dokidoki” should be used. Feelings of nervousness can use “Dokidoki”, but it is usually reserved for more intense moments. :D) > > Thanks for the encouragement! Good luck to you too. Tokyo isn’t the most beautiful or peaceful part of Japan, but I hope you still manage to have fun! Thanks, I had been wondering about that. It’s difficult to comprehend just how differently other people may be seeing the world. I was using nervousness as a shorthand, but yes, you are correct. How did you go about learning the various onomatopoeia of Japanese? Did you pick them up primarily from context or did you look them up? I don’t mean to be a wet blanket, but I would caution you against over idolizing Japanese culture. In my observation, there’s a tendency among some people to put a foreign culture up on a pedestal as a means to distance themselves from the people around them. Japan in particular seems subject to this kind of attention. There’s nothing wrong with being into anime, manga, cosplay, and games, I myself enjoy them to varying degrees. But I urge you to keep the same critical eye toward foreign cultures as you would your native culture. Everywhere in the world has bad points along with the good ones and they’re all tangled up into a huge mess. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2013, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/75 "2013-11-12T12:28:04Z")
If one day you were re-assessed and found not to have an ASD, how would you feel? Relief? Sadness? Disbelief? How much of your identity is tied up in the disorder, do you think? ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2013, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/76 "2013-11-12T16:10:34Z")
> [@Purin](#): > > Yeah, but I tend to leave things messy. When I organize things, it’s usually stuff I care about. Everything else is all cluttered. Like my room right now, haha! > [@cmyk](#): > > I wasn’t calling you messy. > > But yeh, you’re totally messy. Clean your room! 😉 So, do aspies ever roll their eyes at their father? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Purin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Purin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purin)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2013, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/77 "2013-11-12T19:31:31Z")
> [@Garula](#): > > Thanks, I had been wondering about that. It’s difficult to comprehend just how differently other people may be seeing the world. I was using nervousness as a shorthand, but yes, you are correct. How did you go about learning the various onomatopoeia of Japanese? Did you pick them up primarily from context or did you look them up? > > I don’t mean to be a wet blanket, but I would caution you against over idolizing Japanese culture. In my observation, there’s a tendency among some people to put a foreign culture up on a pedestal as a means to distance themselves from the people around them. Japan in particular seems subject to this kind of attention. There’s nothing wrong with being into anime, manga, cosplay, and games, I myself enjoy them to varying degrees. But I urge you to keep the same critical eye toward foreign cultures as you would your native culture. Everywhere in the world has bad points along with the good ones and they’re all tangled up into a huge mess. Oh, some I looked up, but most manga I read have onomatopoeia with a side note explaining what the intended SFX is. i.e, (Beating, beating) or (Clatter, clatter). I do, the USA is an amazing country in many aspects! I was just pointing out differences and what I like and dislike about them. Japan has it’s downsides as well. 🙂 > [@monstro](#): > > If one day you were re-assessed and found not to have an ASD, how would you feel? Relief? Sadness? Disbelief? How much of your identity is tied up in the disorder, do you think? I wouldn’t believe it. At all. Over the 3 years of my knowledge that I had this disorder, it has been more clear to me about my symptoms, and I have noticed and even stopped my Aspie-like behavior before it happened! If I was re-tested the same way, and they said I didn’t have it, I would say whatever doctor tested me isn’t doing his job well, and he’s an idiot. The signs are there, even I noticed them! My personality is heavily tied into my Aspergers. If I actually didn’t have Aspergers, I would be quieter, but more outgoing, I would think. But that’s not necessarily what I want! :o > [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > So, do aspies ever roll their eyes at their father? 😕 All the time. But I would say that’s just regular teenage behavior. Although, may I add that I don’t roll my eyes nearly as much. But it happens. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2013, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/78 "2013-11-13T06:26:56Z")
Do you have superpowers? If so, what is your kryptonite? ---
**Author:** ![Purin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Purin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purin)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2013, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314/79 "2013-11-13T18:05:17Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > Do you have superpowers? If so, what is your kryptonite? Misspelling. I have an overwhelming urge to serve justice to the illiterate. You can just call me: Hyperlexia. [del] (Just to save unnecessary comments, I really do have Hyperlexia. It’s the opposite of Dyslexia. [Here](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperlexia)’s more about it if you wish to read up on it.) [/del] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-aspie-teenage-girl/673314.md?page=3)