# Ask the conspiracy theorist **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 27, 2012, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012 "2012-10-27T05:07:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2012, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/301 "2012-12-21T15:48:23Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > Well, which is it? The “intelligentsia” or the “world of finance?” It doesn’t matter, because they’re controlled by someone higher up and even more secretive. It’s turtles all the way up. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2012, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/302 "2012-12-21T16:47:54Z")
New York Times, financial interests, intelligentsia…yada yada yada the illuminati. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2012, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/303 "2012-12-21T16:54:08Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > You’re doing that gnomic gibberish thing again - and not answering direct, simple questions. +1 ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2012, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/304 "2012-12-26T06:08:58Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > Well, which is it? The “intelligentsia” or the “world of finance?” It doesn’t matter. > [@Telemark](#): > > It doesn’t matter, because they’re controlled by someone higher up and even more secretive. It’s turtles all the way up. And at the top is the Anarch. > [@Loach](#): > > New York Times, financial interests, intelligentsia..yada yada yada the illuminati. Not quite right. My hypothesis is that there is an Anarch who, among other things, controls wars, controls what’s on the front page of _The New York Times_, controls all political parties, all political movements, all events, all groups from drug cartels to the entertainment industry, heads of government, the Ayatollahs, persons on [this](http://www.wargs.com/essays/succession/2011.html) list, the Saudi royal family, the Pope, and everyone else to a greater or lesser degree. > [@](#): > > He who controls the past controls the future. He who controls the present controls the past. - George Orwell ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2012, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/305 "2012-12-26T08:38:33Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Not quite right. My hypothesis is that there is an Anarch who, among other things, controls wars, controls what’s on the front page of _The New York Times_, controls all political parties, all political movements, all events, all groups from drug cartels to the entertainment industry, heads of government, the Ayatollahs, persons on [this](http://www.wargs.com/essays/succession/2011.html) list, the Saudi royal family, the Pope, and everyone else to a greater or lesser degree. Is the Anarch responsible for the Holocaust? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2012, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/306 "2012-12-26T15:10:58Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > It doesn’t matter. > > And at the top is the Anarch. > > Not quite right. My hypothesis is that there is an Anarch who, among other things, controls wars, controls what’s on the front page of _The New York Times_, controls all political parties, all political movements, all events, all groups from drug cartels to the entertainment industry, heads of government, the Ayatollahs, persons on [this](http://www.wargs.com/essays/succession/2011.html) list, the Saudi royal family, the Pope, and everyone else to a greater or lesser degree. My hypothesis is that Barney the Purple Dinosaur controls the Anarch. I can offer just as much proof as you. Anyone can come up with a kooky idea. Oh I know you will now link to something that has nothing to do with your point and offer no explanation. I think it is telling that you are willing to take the Newtown massacre at face value (a situation which an implausible but internally logical conspiracy theory could be made) but you believe that someone caused hurricane Sandy just to get a liberal mayor to endorse Obama. Please talk to a professional. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2012, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/307 "2012-12-26T15:32:17Z")
Don’t fall for it, Kozmic. What Loach isn’t telling you is that he is the Anarch. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2012, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/308 "2012-12-26T16:48:22Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Don’t fall for it, Kozmic. What Loach isn’t telling you is that he is the Anarch. Shhhhh you’ll ruin it. ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/309 "2012-12-27T17:05:40Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Is the Anarch responsible for the Holocaust? Yes. The Anarch is responsible for all events from 9/11 to the Holocaust. ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/310 "2012-12-27T17:07:04Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Yes. The Anarch is responsible for all events from 9/11 to the Holocaust. What about Jonestown, Heavens Gate and similar mass/cult suicides? ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/311 "2012-12-27T17:08:28Z")
Kozmik, have you heard that the Sandy Hook shootings were planned by the Obama administration to get rid of guns and that the teachers and police interviewed on t.v. were all actors? What do you think of that? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/312 "2012-12-27T17:08:40Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Yes. The Anarch is responsible for all events from 9/11 to the Holocaust. And yet, when he gives the Prime Minister of Israel an order, the latter follows it instead of trying to kill him? Does not compute. Why would he follow orders given by Hitler’s boss? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/313 "2012-12-27T17:11:10Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Not quite right. My hypothesis is that there is an Anarch who, among other things, controls wars, controls what’s on the front page of _The New York Times_ You say you trust what the Times prints, and you say the Times is run by a global conspiracy. This makes no sense. ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/314 "2012-12-27T17:11:59Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > And yet, when he gives the Prime Minister of Israel an order, the latter follows it instead of trying to kill him? Does not compute. Why would he follow orders given by Hitler’s boss? Clearly Netanyahu is One Of Them. ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/315 "2012-12-27T17:19:43Z")
> [@chiroptera](#): > > What about Jonestown, Heavens Gate and similar mass/cult suicides? Yes, to a greater or lesser degree. Wikipedia article on [Jonestown conspiracy theory](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonestown_conspiracy_theory). > [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > Kozmik, have you heard that the Sandy Hook shootings were planned by the Obama administration to get rid of guns and that the teachers and police interviewed on t.v. were all actors? What do you think of that? I haven’t heard about that. Ridiculous. > [@Alessan](#): > > And yet, when he gives the Prime Minister of Israel an order, the latter follows it instead of trying to kill him? Does not compute. Why would he follow orders given by Hitler’s boss? 😕 > [@Marley23](#): > > You say you trust what the Times prints, and you say the Times is run by a global conspiracy. This makes no sense. I trust what the Times print. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/316 "2012-12-27T17:20:35Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > I trust what the Times print. 😉 Your riddles are boring. Either explain how this makes sense to you, or admit it doesn’t make any sense. ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/317 "2012-12-27T17:31:38Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Yes, to a greater or lesser degree. Wikipedia article on [Jonestown conspiracy theory](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonestown_conspiracy_theory). Ah. That clears everything up. So wikipedia is not controlled by the Illuminati? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/318 "2012-12-27T17:52:09Z")
> [@Kozmik](#): > > Yes. The Anarch is responsible for all events from 9/11 to the Holocaust. The Anarch is a concept from a work of fiction. Ernst Junger wrote fiction and used it to explore philosophy. It is not a history book. Let me let you in on another secret. Robert Anton Wilson was writing a comedy not a history book. > [@Kozmik](#): > > I haven’t heard about that. Ridiculous. > > ) How is a Newtown conspiracy less ridiculous than Dr Evil creating and aiming hurricane Sandy at the New York area to get Bloomberg to endorse Obama? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/319 "2012-12-27T17:55:13Z")
Kozmic, do you meet in person with other conspiracists to discuss conspiracies? Kozmic, do you meet on-line with other conspiracists to discuss conspiracies? Kozmic, what is the best thing a person can do to recogize what is and what is not a conspiracy? ---
**Author:** ![Ace309](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ace309/32/1050_2.png) [@Ace309](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ace309)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2012, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012/320 "2012-12-27T21:17:12Z")
**Kozmik** , what’s your job? I’m not asking for details, just a general idea of your level of responsibility. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012.md?page=15) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-conspiracy-theorist/639012.md?page=17)