# Ask the emotional vampire

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-emotional-vampire/641925>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [November 23, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-emotional-vampire/641925 "2012-11-23T19:27:03Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\
**Post date:** [December 10, 2012, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-emotional-vampire/641925/61 "2012-12-10T15:38:26Z")

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Yours does imply a certain expectation of your fellowman.

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**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\
**Post date:** [December 10, 2012, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-emotional-vampire/641925/62 "2012-12-10T17:07:46Z")

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This thread is fucked. I invite anyone whose contempt I have not aroused to continue the discussion [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=15781165#post15781165), on a hopefully more positive tack: _overcoming_ negativity.

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**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2012, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-emotional-vampire/641925/63 "2012-12-11T04:18:52Z")

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> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#):
>
> This thread is fucked. I invite anyone whose contempt I have not aroused to continue the discussion [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=15781165#post15781165), on a hopefully more positive tack: _overcoming_ negativity.

Again, I don’t think people are sitting around feeling contempt for you. You are feeling contempt for yourself and projecting it onto the outside world like a window through which you interact with the world. Ignoring all evidence when it isn’t there and magnifying it when it is. A lot of us have too many failings and shames of our own to sit around contemptous of other people for having the same problems.

That is arguably the shittiest part of self hatred and something I know I struggle with myself. If there was a loving creator who created us, that is a massive design flaw. The fact that our self hatred can make it impossible for us to accept that other people generally don’t hate us as much as we hate ourselves, or that makes us blind to compassion because we don’t feel it for yourself.

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